You know you're stoned when.......

Discussion in 'Stonable Quotables' started by farm hippie, Dec 18, 2014.

  1.  
    SSG_Ranger

    SSG_Ranger Member

    You move things off the top of the stove because ghosts could turn on the burners, catch them on fire and burn down your house
     
    Tokachu likes this.
  2.  
    dodacky

    dodacky Active Member

    ha story of my life. pretty much garanteed to do this at least once every time im blazed
     
    ttystikk likes this.
  3.  
    Thatrated

    Thatrated Member

    when I can't stop talking... Like a girl :shock:
     
    JCS57 and ForRealz like this.
  4.  
    SSG_Ranger

    SSG_Ranger Member

    you look at an infant on a TV show and realize there must be a whole industry in Hollywood devoted to churning out babies to be on TV
     
  5.  
    meristem

    meristem Well-Known Member

    photosynthesis is cool as shit!!!
     
  6.  
    david1986

    david1986 Member

    I'm always stoned :eyesmoke:
     
  7.  
    ForRealz

    ForRealz Well-Known Member

    ...when you get up to go to Kitchen, and you're like "[email protected]#k why did I come in here?"... go back to living room, go to press Play, only to realize the Reason you just went to kitchen was because you had left Remote Control in there on a Previous Kitchen Trip!!!
     
    ttystikk likes this.
  8.  
    Kcbscrogger

    Kcbscrogger Well-Known Member

    When you're a doctor and your thermometer is behind your ear and your pen is missing.
     
    zoic likes this.
  9.  
    LegalizeNature420

    LegalizeNature420 Well-Known Member

    ...when the infomercial is interesting.
     
    JCS57, PoodleBud, ttystikk and 2 others like this.
  10.  
    Mr. Bongwater

    Mr. Bongwater Well-Known Member

    when this is you
     
    New Age United likes this.
  11.  
    puck1969

    puck1969 Well-Known Member

    Posted this before but, when you get let out of work early on Friday. You smoke
    a bowl and go get fast food for lunch. Great tunes are playing so your jammin'
    but it's cold outside so your window is up. Your moving up in line to order and your
    air drumming is on point! Then you realize your 1 car from the window and never ordered
    at the microphone..... fuuuucccckkkk.... Embarrassment and no food....
     
    hellmutt bones, ForRealz and ttystikk like this.
  12.  
    Mr. Bongwater

    Mr. Bongwater Well-Known Member

    be like yeah i need my burger and i made a mistake
     
    ForRealz and Olive Drab Green like this.
  13.  
    Olive Drab Green

    Olive Drab Green Well-Known Member

    My excuse, verbatim. :0
     
    ForRealz, ttystikk and Mr. Bongwater like this.
  14.  
    mean.green

    mean.green Well-Known Member

    Do a gravity bong and forget to put a bucket for the draining the water; you end up looking like you pissed your pants.
     
    ArcticOrange likes this.
  15.  
    ttystikk

    ttystikk Well-Known Member

    Aww fuck, at least I'm not alone!
     
    ForRealz and ArcticOrange like this.
  16.  
    RM3

    RM3 Well-Known Member

    When ya smell colors, taste music, see smells, hear bugs walkin across the floor, float to the bathroom to take a pee and your pee sparkles, when ya talk to animals and they talk back, When ya read RIU post to the tune of old Pink Floyd songs

    Ya'll must be smokin that Indica weed 8)
     
    skunkwreck likes this.
  17.  
    skunkwreck

    skunkwreck Well-Known Member

    When your wife finds you sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor with a 2 litre Coke-cola eating peanut butter out of the jar with a 14 inch butcher knife at 3:00 am .
     
    SwitchHitter, JCS57, ForRealz and 3 others like this.
  18.  
    Olive Drab Green

    Olive Drab Green Well-Known Member

    When you wake up in a VA hospital emergency room in Syracuse with a BAC of .35 five hours after drinking a fifth on top of benzos in under an hour and your entire body has scrapes, burns, cuts, and dried blood all over it.

    ..Oh, wait, no, that's hung over and totally fucked, not high.
     
    ttystikk and skunkwreck like this.
  19.  
    Mr. Bongwater

    Mr. Bongwater Well-Known Member

    when u can't function
     
  20.  
    hellmutt bones

    hellmutt bones Well-Known Member

    You end up kissing your dog and petting your kids.
     

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