# I have an unexpected drug test



## dicko (May 8, 2008)

i have an unexpected drug test tomoro wot do i do? help


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## russman22 (May 8, 2008)

Drink as much cranberry juice as you can everyime i had a test the next day i would drink 2 liters of it and it worked everytime


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## Happygrower (May 8, 2008)

Yeah just try to drink as much as you can and keep your fingers crossed. Good Luck


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## LemonHerb (May 8, 2008)

Do a google search for quick fix 4.0


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## korvette1977 (May 8, 2008)

bend over and kiss your ass goodbye ...YOUR FIRED... Just kidding .. I have no clue .. call in sick ?


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## email468 (May 8, 2008)

see if you can delay it (or if you fail ask for another test) and get this...
https://www.whizzinator.com/


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## gangjababy (May 8, 2008)

If you know what time you have the test the cleansing drinks you get at the headshops last a a few hours.


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## Pookiedough (May 8, 2008)

Thanks for the link...Miss Pookie has plans for that!


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## email468 (May 8, 2008)

Pookiedough said:


> Thanks for the link...Miss Pookie has plans for that!


they make cheaper and more fun ones if your plans are what i think they are....


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## 40acres (May 8, 2008)

I cant find the link for it, but sonnet #7 is what works. I have taken hundreds of piss tests(being on paper for a decade) and have fouud this is the best out there. It uses benzoalyte clay to suck out toxins and inpurities out of your stomach, and then out your alimentary canal. You can use it for diarhea it is that good.
You can find it at health food stores. It is a whole line, but you need #7. Take a coffee cup full, and withina few hours or less, you will piss clean.
Believe me, I went down for intent to grow, am a heavy smoker, and refuse to quit for anything.I was on probation or parole from the ages of 15-25, and have two spererate DOC numbers.I never failed a UA. This is the way around it. It only costs 20 bucks a bottle, and they cant test for it.It cant hurt you, and you get multiple uses per bottle.


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## 40acres (May 8, 2008)

email468 said:


> they make cheaper and more fun ones if your plans are what i think they are....


Good morn Email


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## Pookiedough (May 8, 2008)

Here is a link to the stuff 40acres is talking about.Sonne'S No. 7 Detoxification by Sonne's Organic Foods - VitaminShoppe.com


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## LemonHerb (May 8, 2008)

Detoxifiers don't work, if they made a product that could remove toxins from your body no one would get sick. Get someone else to pee for you, or get some synthetic urine.


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## 40acres (May 8, 2008)

LemonHerb said:


> Detoxifiers don't work, if they made a product that could remove toxins from your body no one would get sick. Get someone else to pee for you, or get some synthetic urine.


Have you tried it? Once again, just like as in growing, if you havent used it or done it, then you shouldnt give people advice on it.


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## Yondaime (May 8, 2008)

Here, download and read this pdf file it covers drug tests mostly for weed but also for other drugs. It will tell you what to expect, what will work, what wont etc. etc.

Fooling The Bladder Cops - The Complete Drug Testing Guide.pdf

Fooling The Bladder Cops - The Complete Drug Testing Guide.pdf (391.5 KB)


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## LemonHerb (May 8, 2008)

40acres said:


> Have you tried it? Once again, just like as in growing, if you havent used it or done it, then you shouldnt give people advice on it.


Good point, I'm going to go home and drink bleech or something but not go to the doctor and instead ill use some of this detox tea. I don't think it will work, I'll probably die, but I haven't tried it and bleech is a toxin so it should just get rid of it right away. 

Have I tried detoxifiers? Yes, my liver still works... But also yes I have used detox drinks, didn't cure any diseases or problems I have, didn't make me feel healthier but I did shit more. 

The detox myth | Special reports | guardian.co.uk
Detox Aids - The Myth Of Detoxing
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/health/dietfitness.html?in_article_id=373209&in_page_id=1798

Mostly diet information, but maybe useful. I do however know that synthetic urine or someone else's urine will work. But I haven't tried a detox method for a drug test, so feel free to bet your job on whatever advice you want.


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## email468 (May 8, 2008)

LemonHerb said:


> Good point, I'm going to go home and drink bleech or something but not go to the doctor and instead ill use some of this detox tea. I don't think it will work, I'll probably die, but I haven't tried it and bleech is a toxin so it should just get rid of it right away.
> 
> Have I tried detoxifiers? Yes, my liver still works... But also yes I have used detox drinks, didn't cure any diseases or problems I have, didn't make me feel healthier but I did shit more.
> 
> ...


I think you may be confusing detoxing (which is mostly baloney as you point out) with diluting - which is what most "detox" products attempt to do - dilute something enough and it will be undetectable. 

Unless 40acres is lying, which i see no evidence of, then this product does seem to work to dilute the "marijuana alert" for drug tests enough to not register.

Personally, I'd prefer the less nail-biting method of using clean urine ala the whizzinator. Well actually i'd prefer employers and the government stay the hell away from my piss but here we are.


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## LemonHerb (May 8, 2008)

Diluting of course can work, but I view that as a last resort personally. I'd always go for something I know is going to work 100% (unless I get caught) then something questionable but that's just me.


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## LoudBlunts (May 8, 2008)

i always get kids to piss in a medicine bottle.


if they ask me, i tell them im piss testing them to make sure they arent doing anything they arent supposed to!


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## superhighme (May 8, 2008)

go to GNC or Super Suppliments or your local head shop. they have different drinks that you can take. they taste like shit and you have to drink like a gallon of water afterwards and pretty quickly, but they do work.


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## Pookiedough (May 8, 2008)

Im just looking forward to the pee nazi's face when I whip out my whizzinator.JUST KIDDING!


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## skunkmaster311 (May 9, 2008)

you kno what i heard works idk if its true when u go to piss just piss a real little bit in the cup then add all water but make sure its enough piss to keep the liquid yellow ya kno ...probly bs but it sounded like it might work


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## dicko (May 11, 2008)

well it was negitive but it was on boarder line for pretty much every thing it test except bzo but i cant remember taking all that stuff lol


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## LocoMonkey (May 11, 2008)

So what did you end up using?


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## coolman1a (May 11, 2008)

Ya what did you use? Hey quick questions, how long is the detection time for weed in a blood test? Ive been clean for 2 weeks, if i hit about half a gram or crip(good quality) how long will it take me to get clean again(5ft-10in, 135pounds with about 15% body fat, exersice 3x per week, drink about 3 bottles of water a day)?


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## dicko (May 12, 2008)

coolman1a said:


> Ya what did you use? Hey quick questions, how long is the detection time for weed in a blood test? Ive been clean for 2 weeks, if i hit about half a gram or crip(good quality) how long will it take me to get clean again(5ft-10in, 135pounds with about 15% body fat, exersice 3x per week, drink about 3 bottles of water a day)?


 weed stays in ur system for 6 weeks if ur a chronic user and about 7 to 10 days if u only smoke soscialy


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## dicko (May 12, 2008)

drug wise or my test?


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## LocoMonkey (May 12, 2008)

What did you end up using to pass your test?


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## Yondaime (May 12, 2008)

You guys really need to read "Fooling The Bladder Cops - The Complete Drug Testing Guide"

Cannabinoids have a detection time of 3-45 days

Factors that an influence the detection time of Cannabinoids : Metabolism, fluid intake, tolerance, frequency of intake of substance, amount of substance, potency of substance, length of time you have been a user and amount of body fat.

2.2.1 Frequency of Intake
If you use marijuana on rare occasions, your urine may be clean of metabolites
in less than a week. There is a common and strange phenomena that occurs
with chronic users. You would expect a chronic user to have the longest
detection time and the smallest chance of passing. This is not always the
case. A chronic user with a high tolerance will eliminate drugs quicker than
an occasional user. Chronic users have tested negative after a week long
binge.

2.2.2 Amount of Body Fat
Lipid tissue also makes a huge dierence. Skinny users not only have a faster
metabolism (usually), but also lack storage for THC metabolites. Fat will
cause a lag in excretion pattern, and lead to a longer detection time.

2.2.3 Predicting Detection Period
You should now be able to understand why an individuals detection time
for THC is so unpredictable. Please don't post or e-mail a question "how
long will it take..." This is the single most frequently asked question. Many
people can't even begin to estimate a detection for their own bodys, let alone
the unseen, unknown body of a internet explorer.
There is an inaccurate program that will plot a graph of time versus percentage
of THC in your system given the days you've smoked. The program
is called CALC_THC.EXE and can be found on the internet. CALC_THC cannot
possibly be accurate because it doesn't have any way of measuring the
potentcy of the weed, and it leaves metabolism out of the equation.

2.3 Positive (dened)
50 nanograms of THC metabolites per milliliter denes a "presumptive positive"
by NIDA certied labs. This value was originally 20 ng/mL, but too
many false positives resulted. So the level was raised to 100 ng/mL to reduce
false positives. As of January 1995, the threshold was lowered back down to
50 ng/mL because drinking water would easily bring a positive below 100 ng.
Be aware that these cutos are not universally consistent. I recently heard
of a lab using a 15 ng/mL cuto! Table 2.2 details the thresholds for other
substances.

2.3.1 Passive smoke and positives
"Second hand marijuana smoke in a car can cause you to fail the next day". It is possible that second hand [marijuana] smoke will raise someone to the 50 ng/mL level; however, extreme exposure is required. For instance, a closed car full of pot smokers and a non-smoker may render the non-smoker positive for both urinalysis and the hair test, provided that they are sealed in the car for a while. The Army did a case study where volunteers were put in a room pumped full of smoke for an hour, five times
daily. Subjects started testing positive after the second day. The non-smoker
would have to take in virtually as much second hand smoke as a smoker
inhales. Non-smokers are safe in a ventilated area, as long as they don't get
a hair test. According to Clinton, simply blowing crack smoke on ones hair
may cause a positive hair test. Second hand pot smoke doesn't affect the
hair test results as much as crack smoke does mainly because exhaled smoke
contains no THC. The only pot smoke that contains THC is the smoke that
hasn't entered the lungs.

2.4 Decreasing detection times
Increasing metabolism is probably the most effective way to decrease the
time period that drugs can be detected in your system. Metabolism can be
inuenced by physical activity, diet, and drugs.

2.4.1 Physical Activity
Physical activity can increase your metabolic rate as much as two thousand
percent! Nothing beats proper training taken to an extreme.

2.4.2 Diet
A high calorie diet is the next best way to increase metabolism. Consuming
mass quantities of high calorie food will increase metabolic rate by up to
10 percent. On the contrary, a malnutritious (light) diet could lower your
metabolism by 10 percent.

2.4.3 Using Drugs to Reduce Detection Times
Amphetamines will also increase metabolism. Unfortunately, labs usually
test for speed, and could get you into trouble.

Things Tested to Detect Counter Measures:

Laboratories know how easy it is to tamper with urine samples and alter the
results. Labs often test to Find out if the sample is legitimate.

6.1 Color
If a urine sample looks clear, the lab will suspect that it is watered down.
They cannot report it as positive, but they may reject the sample and inform
your employer that you tried to beat the test. If this happens, the sample
might as well be positive, because you won't get hired. Take vitamin B
complex to color your urine yellow.

6.2 Temperature
Urine should be between 91 and 97 degrees. NIDA certified labs will verify
temperature. If the sample is out of the accepted temperature range, they
will suspect you added water to the cup, or used substitution. Disposable
pocket hand warmers (sold in department stores) will keep a urine sample
warm, provided that the urine is in a condom or douche bag.

6.3 Creatinine
Creatinine is a substance produced by vertebrates, and it shows up in urine. If
someone substitutes their urine with something other than urine, like Mountain
Dew, they will test negative for drugs. However the testee will most
likely not get away with it because Mountain Dew contains zero creatinine,
and labs test creatinine levels to ensure that the sample is valid. Creatinine
levels drop below normal when people dilute their urine. This tests to ensure
that the subject did not drink unusual amounts of water. An *accurate* creatinine
"clearance" test would require a urine and blood test 24 hours before
the drug test to determine the normal creatinine level for that individual.
This is almost never done. You should still be cautious because they do often
use the inaccurate method of comparing your creatinine level during the
drug test to an average. People who are drug-free sometimes lose their jobs
for having too low of a creatinine level.

6.3.1 How to Increase Creatinine Levels
Eating foods rich in protein like red meat will slightly increase creatinine
levels. There is no significant variation between vegetarians and armavors,
so the effect protein has is little. Sexual activity also raises creatinine levels.
I doubt sexual activity influences creatinine level with much significance.
However, a vegetarian that does not have much sex should be concerned.

6.4 pH
pH is often changed when people spike their sample with household products.
Use caution when doping urine, pH is usually tested.

THC is fat soluble, and it gets stored in your fat cells. Cleaning it out of
your lipid tissue is very dicult. Many herbal products claim to clean out
your system, yet they do nothing to remove THC byproducts from fat cells.
A study was done in Germany in 1993 on 50 of the most common herbs used
by people trying to pass the test. All 50 herbs failed to cause a negative.
Unfortunately, this rumor will not die. Goldenseal is useless; yet it's the
most common thing for people to use. The only way to extract THC from
fat cells is to exercise. Fat cells secrete fat with THC metabolites at
a constant rate, regardless of what herbs you consume. You may be able
to temporarily rid THC metabolites from your bloodstream, or dilute your
fluids to yield a larger urine/THC ratio, but your bloodstream will continue
collecting THC metabolites from fat. Your urine will continue collecting
THC metabolites from your bloodstream.


7.1 Dilution
Hyper saturating your body with fluids will dilute metabolites possibly below
the 50 ng/mL threshold, depending on your metabolism. Be aware that
creatinine levels are often tested, and will show that the sample has been
diluted. Diluting your sample will also produce clear urine, with virtually
no yellow color. They will assume that you've diluted your sample, and they
may reject your sample on the basis of color alone. It's only necessary to
start drinking just before the test. Those who drown themselves in fluid days
before a test are only causing unnecessary discomfort. Those who stay up
all night drinking don't have any better chance than one who drinks heavily
first thing in the morning. Get up early if the test is early, but don't lose
sleep over a test that is given in the daytime.

7.2 Water
Drink at least eight hefty glasses of fluid (preferably water) just prior to the
test. Many people start drinking water several days before the test; which
is useless. Water does *not* clean any THC metabolites out of your system
because THC is not water soluble. Water only dilutes urine temporarily. Do
not over do it; you can get water intoxication. People can actually overdose
and even die from water intoxication. It's very hard to do, and you'll vomit
before anything gets serious.


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## dicko (May 13, 2008)

lol i drank like 4 liters of pinapple juice, a liter or apple juice and like a another liter of "ural" and than another 500mls of apple juice before i did the test (this is over 24 hours) i was trying to get rid of other drugs not just thc so i know that drinking for days before just to get rid of thc is a waist of time


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## Morning Star (May 14, 2008)

i have a drug test friday, so i bought a device like the whizzanator. it's cheaper and it doesn't come with the fake dick. all it is a pouch that goes into a velcro belt you wear around your waist with a tube coming out of the pouch. it came with fake piss, but i'm going to have a clean buddy fill it up for me. in the velcro belt there is a space for a little heat packet and you put the heat packet in 45 minutes before use for perfect tempeture pee. the device was like 70 bucks with the fake piss and the heater, and i picked it up at a local head shop. havn't tried it out yet. hope it works.


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## email468 (May 14, 2008)

Morning Star said:


> i have a drug test friday, so i bought a device like the whizzanator. it's cheaper and it doesn't come with the fake dick. all it is a pouch that goes into a velcro belt you wear around your waist with a tube coming out of the pouch. it came with fake piss, but i'm going to have a clean buddy fill it up for me. in the velcro belt there is a space for a little heat packet and you put the heat packet in 45 minutes before use for perfect tempeture pea. the device was like 70 bucks with the fake piss and the heater, and i picked it up at a local head shop. havn't tried it out yet. hope it works.



Let us know how it turns out. and if you could give us more info about the device (like a name/website or something) that would be great!


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## LocoMonkey (May 14, 2008)

MorningStar, I would like a followup as well


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## Morning Star (May 14, 2008)

will do guys.


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## Morning Star (May 14, 2008)

has anyone ever tried using the synthentic piss? what are your opinions on it?


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