# Passing a drug test for the TSA



## AFaQ (May 23, 2010)

So I applied for the TSA.. I have 29 days before my cognitiv test and then I assume I have to take the medical exam and drug test. I have been a daily smoker for 2 years. Is there a possibility to pass this? Any tips? Fake pisser is not an option, Im 18 and a male my mother is a nurse and she said they will test for small traces of sperm in the urine to prove it was mine because of my age and its normally practiced in a drug testing lab. I am sure they will do this because it is a government job, I am not sure the amount of nG they test for though... Also has anyone taken the TSA drug test before?


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## SmokeyMcSmokester (May 23, 2010)

drink lots of water, and work out..i was a daily smoke for 10 years and had to quit due to probation. you can also start popping niacin pills to help clean you out..but the key is at least a gal of water a day..you can buy home test kits that are 99% accurate, just to make sure. 

good luck


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## AFaQ (May 23, 2010)

Thanks alot man! +rep anyone else wanna add any info? +rep to anyone who does


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## AFaQ (May 23, 2010)

by the way im 5'8 and 160lbs


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## dtRepeat (May 23, 2010)

vinegar is great and cranberry juice. anything that gets the fluids moving  run alot too. if you put vinegar in cranberry juice and drink it, you shouldn't taste it that much and it'll be good.


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## dtRepeat (May 23, 2010)

AFaQ said:


> by the way im 5'8 and 160lbs


judging by your body type you can get rid of it pretty fast. for me I look like im 180 but im actually 244, so it would take me like 2 months lol


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## me8980109 (May 24, 2010)

Jesus! So we're gonna depend on you the chronic smoker to defend us from a terrorist attack now??

Let me give you some advice. I work 20 years for the federal government, 15 years overseas working with the DEA, customs, military, foreign governments. Your 18, you have the ability now to land a decent job, government jobs are pretty cushy and you really don't want to fuck this up.

Number one, get clean and stay clean, they (TSA) do random testing and sometimes the observer is standing right beside you, none of this here's a vial go piss BS. They have observers, not always but you cannot count on being alone. If you get the job you will be tested often, I've seen guys test (random) 3 times in a single month. It's random, but sometimes it sure doesn't feel that way.

Two, if you persist in smoking and still decide to test you have only one chance of passing it, clean urine from a company that sells it, and they do. They test immediately after the sample is given for temperture. If it is not warm enough (the sample) it is immediately flagged as suspect and they may reschedule you and place an observer in with you. My guess is that for pre-employement there will be no observer, once hired forget that shit. I passed a physical for the FAA recently that required a urine sample and I was not clean but I had time to get the things I needed. I think I spent $50-75 bucks but it was worth it.

Any thing that is added to the sample can be detected, so you can only pass with clean urine. There is a 100 PPM threshold so you can still have THC in your system but if it's below the threshold it is returned negative. Stay away from addatives or synthetic urine.

Real urine, when purchased comes in a sterile container (bag), is place under your arm near your arm pit and tape in place. A hose goes from there to your pants where a small clip can be released to start the flow. Do not use this if being observed, the fuck'n click (when you release it) is a tell'tale sign something is up. It is kept under your arm for at least 90 minutes to warm to body heat temperture. Remeber it can only be off a few degrees from body temp or it's flagged.

If all goes well and no observer is present your home free.

But do yourself a favor, quit smoking and start a new life as a TSA agent! A good job is sometimes more important in life than smoking pot, others may argue differently but you will have years to enjoy your habit later once you have retired. If you can't stay clean don't even go in for the test. You'll waste a few years training and than get canned anyway for a failed test down the road. I have seen 50+ individuals get the boot for this, some with as much as 18 years federal service, 2 years from retirement.

And I have never heard them test for semen, there are enough genetic markers in urine that you wouldn't test for semen. Mom is just trying to scare you into quiting smoking and taking a good job, LISTEN TO HER!


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## NoDrama (May 24, 2010)

THEY DO NOT TEST FOR SPERM!!!! You can use synthetic, there is no way for the machine to tell the difference NONE AT ALL!!!! I been taking Drug tests for 15 years now, at least 4 a year, I smoke everyday and have never failed a test. I USE SYNTHETIC URINE. It goes through a gas spectrometer, the most exacting of the testing procedures. I pass every time. 

THEY DO NOT CHECK FOR SPERM!!!!!!! They check for normal levels of other things that are the same for male and female, things like creatine levels and specific gravity.

the threshold for THC Metabolites is 50 nanograms per microliter not 100. Thats the equivalent of a few bad drops of urine in a 2 ounce sample.

TSA is the most looked down upon government position there is, your basically a panty sniffer and a Constitution shredder IMO!


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## AFaQ (May 24, 2010)

NoDrama said:


> THEY DO NOT TEST FOR SPERM!!!! You can use synthetic, there is no way for the machine to tell the difference NONE AT ALL!!!! I been taking Drug tests for 15 years now, at least 4 a year, I smoke everyday and have never failed a test. I USE SYNTHETIC URINE. It goes through a gas spectrometer, the most exacting of the testing procedures. I pass every time.
> 
> THEY DO NOT CHECK FOR SPERM!!!!!!! They check for normal levels of other things that are the same for male and female, things like creatine levels and specific gravity.
> 
> ...


I honestly dont care about your opinion on the TSA. A jobs a job espicially in this economy. If they pay me $14+ an hour im taking it and you can fuck off with your constitution ripper bs because im going to do what im paid to. Of course I know my rights and all that I feel that airports wouldn't be safe without them. Also have you ever taken a government test to be sure of that? How do you know its 50 nG? Like I said Id doubt youve taken a government test or even past a written exam for that matter.


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## AFaQ (May 24, 2010)

me8980109 said:


> Jesus! So we're gonna depend on you the chronic smoker to defend us from a terrorist attack now??
> 
> Let me give you some advice. I work 20 years for the federal government, 15 years overseas working with the DEA, customs, military, foreign governments. Your 18, you have the ability now to land a decent job, government jobs are pretty cushy and you really don't want to fuck this up.
> 
> ...


Thanks alot man +rep...im just hesitant about using the fake pisser I really dont want to get caugh...it could mean jailtime!


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## Discgolferman (May 25, 2010)

Im in the same boat....Need to get a job in a Hospital and they test. Ive smoked..proably every day of the last 20 years(I have a bad back amd MJ card) Im 140 lb But 30 of that is probably thc in my body  . Fake piss scares me but it may be the thing I have to do.


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## godsbestgift (May 25, 2010)

I wonder why Gov. jobs stopped taking hair samples...Now thats something to discuss right there. haha you can't get fake scalp hair....or can u hehehehehehe


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## NoDrama (May 25, 2010)

AFaQ said:


> I honestly dont care about your opinion on the TSA. A jobs a job espicially in this economy. If they pay me $14+ an hour im taking it and you can fuck off with your constitution ripper bs because im going to do what im paid to. Of course I know my rights and all that I feel that airports wouldn't be safe without them. Also have you ever taken a government test to be sure of that? How do you know its 50 nG? Like I said Id doubt youve taken a government test or even past a written exam for that matter.


Sure Ive taken Government tests, Spent 8 years in the Marine Corps as enlisted with 5 years with a Secret Security Clearance, then when I transitioned over to the Civilian side I worked for a large contractor and Carried a Top Secret secuurity clearance, the FBI talked to my Neighbors, my parents, my High School and college friends and teachers. I got fingerprinted and they ran a DUI and Crimes check in every state and country I had ever visited. The tests I passed make your daytime panty sniffing job look like initiation into the girl scouts.

A Job is a Job until they ask you to take that walker away from granny and let her fall and break her hip, because your a good little boy and will do what your told to do. Afterwards there are some hot teens traveling with their parents and you just know they got some awesome underwear you can fondle. Perhaps you'll get lucky and one of them will be snagged by the random search generator and you can do a semi strip search with your other TSA Buddies.

And just so you know, your not keeping ANYONE safe. The terrorists will always get through your defenses, the TSA has never caught a single bona fide terrorist in history. You are just put there to give the people a false sense of security, just enough smoke and mirrors so we don't all start crying about how shitty we all have it.

The only people who will be stopping any airborne terrorists are the passengers themselves who will never let that tragedy happen ever again. You TSA guys provide no real service to mankind and since you work for the Fed Govt you are a strain and a waste to all taxpayers, a parasite who makes people feel like a George Orwellian Nightmare has befallen them.


How do I know its 50NG? its called the Federal Government, Ever heard of it? The Federal Government has set the guidelines for their own tests, therefore the rest have followed suit.

50 nanograms of THC metabolites per milliliter defines a "presumptive positive" by most laboratories and instant tests. This value was originally 20 ng/mL, but too many false positives resulted. So the level was raised to 100 ng/mL to reduce false positives. As of January 1995, the threshold was lowered back down to 50 ng/mL because drinking excessive water could easily bring the level of metabolites in the urine below 100 ng/mL. Some employers may use a lower cutoff, but that is rare. If a specimen screens non-negative for THC (anything other than negative or fails an integrity test), the specimen is then sent through a Gas Chromatograph / Mass Spectrometer (GC/MS) for the specific metabolite tripping the immunoassay screening. This level is set at 15 ng/mL for that one specific metabolite.


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## godsbestgift (May 25, 2010)

Did you say Marine...lol there was some dude in another post and the MOD deleted my post, all i said was Hi there Mr. Marine Man how would you like to smoke on my dickhead bong with me. I see nothing wrong with liking Marines lol
Blushing. They Protect and serve......ME


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## MiracleStash (Aug 30, 2011)

HAHA awesome post NoDrama
I just got my job offer rejected by the FAA last week, Federal aviation administration because I had 2 negative diluted results. Its total bs because according to the DOT regulations there supposed to follow, after a negative dilute result they are supposed to retest me directly observed which they didn't. The MRO(medical review officer) was not even supposed to send the 2nd result on. It says it counts as negative if there are 2 negative diluted results.

I used Strip NC complete body cleanser from the local smoke shop. They swore by it and said no one in 4 years has failed using it. The first time I drank the 4 pills and small liquid shot and about 10oz of water more than what the package said(48oz). The second one I made damn sure to measure out exactly 48oz and I still got diluted.

Human resources at the FAA in california are such bitches man... I almost lost my current job because they were too lazy to find a collection facility thats open past 3:30pm. I asked to have it later in the day as possible and both times they schedule me for 8am. They even had me scheduled for a 3rd drug test, but the day before that they called and said they decided to rescind my offer. Such bull shit.


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## tangerinedreamer (Jun 6, 2013)

AFaQ said:


> So I applied for the TSA.. I have 29 days before my cognitiv test and then I assume I have to take the medical exam and drug test. I have been a daily smoker for 2 years. Is there a possibility to pass this? Any tips? Fake pisser is not an option, Im 18 and a male my mother is a nurse and she said they will test for small traces of sperm in the urine to prove it was mine because of my age and its normally practiced in a drug testing lab. I am sure they will do this because it is a government job, I am not sure the amount of nG they test for though... Also has anyone taken the TSA drug test before?


I've gotta ask, because I'm in the same position with you. Just passed my CBT and accepted their contingent offer of employment. Meaning they'll start my credit check soon. So, my question is, how did it go? Did you use fake piss? I recently bought synthetic urine but I'm considering the risk to maybe be too high for that. I think I may have enough time to get clean for this test.


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## iblazetoomuch (Jun 9, 2013)

lol epic resurrection..Almost didn't catch it at all.


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## yeti5508 (Aug 29, 2013)

iblazetoomuch said:


> lol epic resurrection..Almost didn't catch it at all.



Also wondering about which comes first physical or drug test, mines not for a government job but its a bobcat dealership, they said I had to pass a physical and drug test, I'm wondering if I should hide it in boxers or tape it to leg, are they going to stare at my dick in then physical like if so they will see the fake piss.. 

Any help please

I'm buying tight boxer briefs and am gonna go that route


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## ambedexteras (Aug 29, 2013)

hey man. either stop smoking and do alot of excersizing and drink alot of water this month
and you should pass with 29 days for sure.

however if you really tryna not stop and / or buy anything. ik its a gov job but they cant watch you
pee can they? ive personally taken many drugs tests. and the only time i had to stop smoking was 
for a yr like 6 yrs ago when i was on random drug testing for a yr due to being arrested bla bla. and it was for the courts who can actually watch you pee which i believe regular employers can not. however gov MAY be able to. im not sure
which for me always took forever man. hate that shit haha. but all the others have been for a job. iin which case
the most theyve done for a preventitive measure was to empty my pockets.

get a frieend/ relatiive you know and TRULY know are clean of anyh drugs that would come up on your test.
get a sample cup and get them to pee in it that day or the day before. doesnt matter male or female because
they cannot tell unless the women is menstrating or pregnant. and put it under your sack between your legs
and practice walking with it a bit. it really is undetectable. and stays body temp as a result of being 
under your heat bags hahah so they may or may not have you emptuy your pockets. u go into room.
pour the sample. come out and boom passed son. im like 6/6 and have smoked a bowl on the way to the
test everytime. good luck


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## racerboy71 (Aug 29, 2013)

ambedexteras said:


> hey man. either stop smoking and do alot of excersizing and drink alot of water this month
> and you should pass with 29 days for sure.
> 
> however if you really tryna not stop and / or buy anything. ik its a gov job but they cant watch you
> ...


 lol, this thread is about 3 years old, so if dude ain't clean by now, he ain't getting clean, lmao.


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