# Your dick on the internet



## Heisenberg (Sep 30, 2012)

So are there any guys who haven't put their dick on the net? My theory is that guy+camera+computer+time= dick pics. My friend disagrees and thinks that it's actually uncommon for most guys to do it, and then admitted he scanned his dick when he was younger.

Furthermore, have you ever known a girl (or guy) IRL and then manged to track down nude pics of her on the net? Do you think girls are less likely to expose themselves digitally? If you find out your friend's girlfriend has put erotic pics on the net, can your friend get mad at you for jerking off to them?

*Sorry if this seems geared towards males. I welcome ladies input as well.


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

Heisenberg said:


> So are there any guys who haven't put their dick on the net? My theory is that guy+camera+computer+time= dick pics. My friend disagrees and thinks that it's actually uncommon for most guys to do it, and then admitted he scanned his dick when he was younger.
> 
> Furthermore, have you ever known a girl (or guy) IRL and then manged to track down nude pics of her on the net? Do you think girls are less likely to expose themselves digitally? If you find out your friend's girlfriend has put erotic pics on the net, can your friend get mad at you for jerking off to them?


I've never personally uploaded my dick to the internet, but I've sent plenty of dick pics to people I know, as well as a few I don't, and perhaps (more than likely) it's out there somewhere. Let me know if you see it, it's got a freckle just right of center down the shaft, so if you ever happen to see it, that's me!

I'd think it depends on the person in general, I guess most guys are less conservative when it comes to things like that, so it's probably safe to assume there are more guys doing it themselves than girls, but that's only a theory, I have a folder of 'self pics' in my porn collection with a couple thousand different chicks (yep, I like porn), not a single guy.. lol, so I don't have any numbers to support it, but the ladies are out there, that's for sure.

/r/gonewild is awesome for that 

If I had a friend who got upset at me for beating it to his girlfriend for posting pics of herself, I'd probably still do it and just not tell him about it anymore.. I can see why he might be upset, but that's not my fault..


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## sworth (Sep 30, 2012)

There's only two places I would/have put my dick, and they're both organic! 
And my friend could feel free to get mad at my wanking off to pics of his girl found on the net. Where they're found doesn't make it okay...But then, if I were to engage in such practice; I also wouldn't tell him! lol!


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## tyler.durden (Sep 30, 2012)

I've never taken a picture of my dick, and after the reading the OP I'm wondering why that is. I've never (knowingly) seen nude pics of anyone I know on the net, except the pics of my ex-wife I posted last week. I'm not sure if my buddies would be angry with me if I beat off to nude pics of their women, I wouldn't be. IRL, I did mind when guys would stare at the fine woman I was with: I'd stare them down and sometimes say something. I've never fought over this, but it's been close a few times. I don't mind quick, admiring glances at my woman, but the long lustful stares are just rude. I think woman are natural exhibitionists and love to pose of nude/sex pics, but only for the guy or guys she's emotionally close to, whereas guys seem to not mind if the entire world sees their shit. People are funny...


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## sworth (Sep 30, 2012)

Yeh man! That's what I tell my son "Look once to see if you like her, twice if you do, but the third better be coupled with talking to her or you've crossed the line.."


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> I've never taken a picture of my dick, and after the reading the OP I'm wondering why that is. I've never (knowingly) seen nude pics of anyone I know on the net, *except the pics of my ex-wife I posted last week*. I'm not sure if my buddies would be angry with me if I beat off to nude pics of their women, I wouldn't be. IRL, I did mind when guys would stare at the fine woman I was with: I'd stare them down and sometimes say something. I've never fought over this, but it's been close a few times. I don't mind quick, admiring glances at my woman, but the long lustful stares are just rude. I think woman are natural exhibitionists and love to pose of nude/sex pics, but only for the guy or guys she's emotionally close to, whereas guys seem to not mind if the entire world sees their shit. People are funny...



Wait.. what?! LINK SON!


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## thehole (Sep 30, 2012)

They say the camera gives you ten pounds, I wonder how many inches it gives you?

I've never sent a pic of my dick to anyone, but this has happened to me.

[youtube]oTFQ03DMq3A[/youtube]


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## D3monic (Sep 30, 2012)

I was being goofy and sending dick pics to my exwife. I doodled lil smiley faces and shit. One time I drew a monocle and made a little top hat. " some times Mr head likes to get dressed up for Cock-tail parties" well one day I was trying to show a co worker a pic of my new gf and he snatched the phone and started scrolling. That cocktail pic scrolled by. I about died!


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## tyler.durden (Sep 30, 2012)

sworth said:


> Yeh man! That's what I tell my son "Look once to see if you like her, twice if you do, but the third better be coupled with talking to her or you've crossed the line.."


LOL! My son is 11 now, and it's so funny to see what a little man he is. He's giving me the nudge or the 'o'clocks' when he sees a fine chick. He's very discreet with his staring and loves to wear his mirrored sunglasses when we go downtown so he can look but not turn his head. The problem is that he can be attracted to little girls and women, so sometimes I get, 'dad, check that out!' and I'll look to see a pair of 12 year old girls. I'm like, 'Dude, that's not for me, that's for you. Tell me when you see something over 18 (or over 16 if they're particularly hot. J/K)...


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

I had a GIRLFRIEND, yeah, full on BF/GF, who was too conservative to sext pics.. She was pretty self conscious about her body so whatever, even though I loved it.. If someone asked me to sext them a pic, especially if it was my GF, I wouldn't even second guess it. I really couldn't care less who sees my junk, and I don't understand what's the big deal, especially if the person receiving already finds you attractive and they're not candid about letting you know.. I have a semi-fuck buddy right now who is the exact same way. To me, that's totally unattractive, all it does is tell me you're not happy with yourself and you're too lazy to change it. I need to find a better fuck buddy..


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## tyler.durden (Sep 30, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Wait.. what?! LINK SON!


LOL! Here you go, Pad  https://www.rollitup.org/spirituality-sexuality-philosophy/562827-videos-my-ex.html - Post #5...


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

D3monic said:


> I was being goofy and sending dick pics to my exwife. I doodled lil smiley faces and shit. One time I drew a monocle and made a little top hat. " some times Mr head likes to get dressed up for Cock-tail parties" well one day I was trying to show a co worker a pic of my new gf and he snatched the phone and started scrolling. That cocktail pic scrolled by. I about died!


AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAH! +rep


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## robert 14617 (Sep 30, 2012)

i am a dick and look here i am on the net ....you sir are correct


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> LOL! My son is 11 now, and it's so funny to see what a little man he is. He's giving me the nudge or the 'o'clocks' when he sees a fine chick. He's very discreet with his staring and loves to wear his mirrored sunglasses when we go downtown so he can look but not turn his head. The problem is that he can be attracted to little girls and women, so sometimes I get, 'dad, check that out!' and I'll look to see a pair of 12 year old girls. I'm like, 'Dude, that's not for me, that's for you. Tell me when you see something over 18 (or over 16 if they're particularly hot. J/K)...


lmao man, I bet my dad was thinking the same shit and I was always totally oblivious to it.. How old are you, if you don't mind me asking?


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

thehole said:


> They say the camera gives you ten pounds, I wonder how many inches it gives you?
> 
> I've never sent a pic of my dick to anyone, but this has happened to me.
> 
> [youtube]oTFQ03DMq3A[/youtube]


Story?.........


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## tyler.durden (Sep 30, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> lmao man, I bet my dad was thinking the same shit and I was always totally oblivious to it.. How old are you, if you don't mind me asking?


42, but most people guess early 30s. I've got the Sicilian oily olive-skin thing going, our people tend to age well without many wrinkles


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## D3monic (Sep 30, 2012)

If you google penis with a top hat the second image is pretty similar. Except his monocle and mustache is much more superbe


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## robert 14617 (Sep 30, 2012)

on the hard wood floor , you are an animal


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

D3monic said:


> If you google penis with a top hat the second image is pretty similar. Except his monocle and mustache is much more superbe


Post yours! lmfao that's gotta be hilarious in itself! And that's something I've never seen!


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## ProfessorPotSnob (Sep 30, 2012)

Proud to never have shared that side of me with the world through the internet . I had women ask to see such on webcam or in photo and my reply is come feel the real deal , cyber perverts .. Whatever floats your boat I guess but after all is said and done the penis is one ugly instrument compared to female anatomy and to post it like so is gay if you ask me ....

Go ahead post your genitalia on the net , show the world what a slut and looser you really are lmfao ......... Chances are some Gay man will be whacking to your peter one day just as men whacking to female images lmfao ...Sick sad little world it really is


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## tyler.durden (Sep 30, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Oooooh yeah, I remember those, allow me to present one of my ex's, I'm afraid I have to blur the face though (it's exceptionally beautiful imo, but for the sake of privacy) and this'll probably get deleted, so look quick bud!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Wow! Those are some Tig ol' Biddies. More, please!


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> 42, but most people guess early 30s. I've got the Sicilian oily olive-skin thing going, our people tend to age well without many wrinkles



Dude, I thought you were mid-late 20's max this entire time! MindBLOWN!


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## D3monic (Sep 30, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Post yours! lmfao that's gotta be hilarious in itself! And that's something I've never seen!


lol I don't have the pics no more thank G** that's actually why I googled to see if it came up.


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## tyler.durden (Sep 30, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Dude, I thought you were mid-late 20's max this entire time! MindBLOWN!


Yeah, I'm pretty young at heart. I don't have much in common with the other 40 year old dads, it's all additions to their homes, their investment portfolios, their new cars... yawn. Not that those things aren't important, but let's talk ideas, science, philosophy, art, music, literature, something meaningful and personal... or at least interesting...


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Yeah, I'm pretty young at heart. I don't have much in common with the other 40 year old dads, it's all additions to their homes, their investment portfolios, their new cars... yawn. Not that those things aren't important, but let's talk ideas, science, philosophy, art, music, literature, something meaningful and personal... or at least interesting...


You're still 26 to me brah


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## thehole (Sep 30, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Story?.........


Well I won't go into super details but when I lived in Texas for a summer at age 19 I was at a giant outside parking lot type garage sale event 30 minutes or so northeast or something of Corpus in some small town. My friend and I walked by a booth where this older(late 30s early 40s)good looking lady with huge tits(not my thing, I like asses) and she immediately said "come here blondie" and grabbed my hand and brought me back behind her booth wall and proceeded to give me a handjob. I think I remember telling her "let's just fuck somewhere" and she said something like "no no no, no time cutie" and amazingly somehow I came fairly quickly, about 4-5 minutes, she knew what she was doing. As she was jerking me off she would take her other hand and squeeze my balls or grab my ass, she went up under my shirt behind my back and dug in with her nails. She would put me in a low bear lock position for a minute then slide in front of me, then at my side. She was almost circling me like a fucking shark. She was pinching me and shit and I was like wtf but it worked. 
My friend was waiting a few booths down and was like wtf when I came out. 
I swear to the sun that when we were walking away I looked back and she was greeting some guy and his wife by shaking their hands with the same hand she just got done jerking me off with. I was wtf-ing myself at that point. It was strange to say the least. One of those weird sexual moments and events you know don't happen often, but do happen and just finished doing it. During I didn't even have time to think it was so surprising and intense.

Christ, I have tons of these stories just from my 8 month summer spent in southeast Texas that year. One of the best years of my life!


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## robert 14617 (Sep 30, 2012)

i hate to tell you this but that sir was my gay cousin dressed in drag


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## Padawanbater2 (Sep 30, 2012)

thehole said:


> *Well I won't go into super details* but when I lived in Texas for a summer at age 19 I was at a giant outside parking lot type garage sale event 30 minutes or so northeast or something of Corpus in some small town. My friend and I walked by a booth where this older(late 30s early 40s)good looking lady with huge tits(not my thing, I like asses) and she immediately said "come here blondie" and grabbed my hand and brought me back behind her booth wall and proceeded to give me a handjob. I think I remember telling her "let's just fuck somewhere" and she said something like "no no no, no time cutie" and amazingly somehow I came fairly quickly, about 4-5 minutes, she knew what she was doing. As she was jerking me off she would take her other hand and squeeze my balls or grab my ass, she went up under my shirt behind my back and dug in with her nails. She would put me in a low bear lock position for a minute then slide in front of me, then at my side. She was almost circling me like a fucking shark. She was pinching me and shit and I was like wtf but it worked.
> My friend was waiting a few booths down and was like wtf when I came out.
> I swear to the sun that when we were walking away I looked back and she was greeting some guy and his wife by shaking their hands with the same hand she just got done jerking me off with. I was wtf-ing myself at that point. It was strange to say the least. One of those weird sexual moments and events you know don't happen often, but do happen and just finished doing it. During I didn't even have time to think it was so surprising and intense.
> 
> Christ, I have tons of these stories just from my 8 month summer spent in southeast Texas that year. One of the best years of my life!


lmfao 10/10

Bravo dude. Great story


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## thespaceman937 (Sep 30, 2012)

Low standards.... me too


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## sworth (Sep 30, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Yeah, I'm pretty young at heart. I don't have much in common with the other 40 year old dads, it's all additions to their homes, their investment portfolios, their new cars... yawn. Not that those things aren't important, but let's talk ideas, science, philosophy, art, music, literature, something meaningful and personal... or at least interesting...


Nothin' to add to that statement tyler.durden, and nothin' to take away.

My thanks to you for reminding me I'm not alone in feeling/acting that way...

[video=youtube;BDbZvOPuE7A]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDbZvOPuE7A[/video]


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## Shannon Alexander (Sep 30, 2012)

Yeah my dick is out and about on the internets...

It's wider through the middle of the shaft... You guys may or may not have seen it before...


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## guy incognito (Sep 30, 2012)

I'm sure mine is all over the net. I don't know where specifically, but I have sent out enough so I am sure it is. When I got my PA done there was some pictures taken for a portfolio of the piercer, and it got circulated among almost everyone I knew and tons of people I didn't. It was posted online in his portfolio so people could just link to it instead of having the actual picture. Don't know the status of that now though.

I have seen nudes of people I know when they were either offered up by that person, or by that persons bf. I have never hunted them down myself.


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## Tragic420 (Oct 3, 2012)

i must say, i have done videos and pics.....


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## Tragic420 (Oct 3, 2012)

and i like it!!!!!


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 3, 2012)

guy incognito said:


> I'm sure mine is all over the net. I don't know where specifically, but I have sent out enough so I am sure it is. *When I got my PA done* there was some pictures taken for a portfolio of the piercer, and it got circulated among almost everyone I knew and tons of people I didn't. It was posted online in his portfolio so people could just link to it instead of having the actual picture. Don't know the status of that now though.
> 
> I have seen nudes of people I know when they were either offered up by that person, or by that persons bf. I have never hunted them down myself.






Tragic420 said:


> and i like it!!!!!


Me too lol


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## Tragic420 (Oct 4, 2012)

lol yeeeep i dont mind one bit


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## Omgwtfbbq Indicaman (Oct 4, 2012)

ever since a video of mine got out in high school (like 5 years ago) i've been avoiding digital proof, got me into trouble with the law. some people, act like they never seen a penis before sheesh.


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## BabyPothead (Oct 9, 2012)

sent dick pics, but never just left em up on the internet naw


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## thump easy (Oct 9, 2012)

fuck usaully when people piss me off i send picks of my penis and post it lolz i got a shit load of pics of naked girl friends i have had but i wont post them!!! and im shure they got pics of me i know of two that still from now and again the years fly and i will get a message on the computer email and well memory lane... lolz but know that im older i dont feel the earge to send a pic to my girl like i usto lolz i dont know.. im considerd crazzy in the noggin...


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## charface (Oct 9, 2012)

I got fuck pics floating around and yes my dick was involved.


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## ClaytonBigsby (Oct 10, 2012)

Uh, Thump, you posted a pic of your dick here at RIU about a month ago.


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## Bottleandmobile (Oct 10, 2012)

LoL

Once when i was in highschool there was one girl my classmate she was hot but almost everyone hated her, so one day i took pic of my dick and sent her with Yahoo (anonymous ID for sure) thats all what i did lol. Otherwise I thinks uploading your dicpicks is pretty lame


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 10, 2012)

Shoot... i just made a video of my GF giving me a blowjob... give me a link where i can put it online and post that shit and i'll fuckin show you guys, i don't give a fuck lol. I bet she'll be pissed if anyone finds out... which i personally, would think is funny, but i think a lot of things are funny that other people don't. Lmfao, that reminds me of a sweet prank i thought of a year or so ago. 

So it was random, a split second thought i had... So my little bro was over at my apt. to help me out with my garden, and before hand he went to take a piss, so i grabbed two cups of water, filled one up half way, and the other all the way (i just wanted to make it different, to see which one he would pick, its a psychological thing) so i took both cups into the bathroom right after he was done and said "bro... pick one" he's like, "whaaaaa? why" i said "no time man, pick one" so he picked the half full one, and as soon as he grabbed it, i threw my full cup of water right in his face!!

Then i stared at him to see his reaction, which was funny as hell!!!! At first he looked confused, i noticed from his facial expression... then a split second later he looked angry, he looked around for a second (i think he was attempting to find something to get back at me with) and finally looked at the cup of water in his hand, not a moment later, he threw the cup of water he was holding in his hand, in my face... and we both just started laughing like crazy!!!

It all happened exactly like i had suspected, and i think this joke is one that you all should try one a close friend of yours just to see if what they will do, if they will throw the cup of water in your face, set it down, or what! It's a super fun psychological experiment, just don't forget to watch their reaction to the fullest. 

Peace out, Zaehet's drunk tonight.


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 11, 2012)

http://www.sexykarma.com/gonewild/

http://videobam.com/

There ya go, bud


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 11, 2012)

EDIT: Rofl mixed up members!


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 11, 2012)

Zaehet Strife said:


> Shoot... i just made a video of my GF giving me a blowjob... give me a link where i can put it online and post that shit and i'll fuckin show you guys, i don't give a fuck lol. I bet she'll be pissed if anyone finds out... which i personally, would think is funny, but i think a lot of things are funny that other people don't. Lmfao, that reminds me of a sweet prank i thought of a year or so ago.
> 
> So it was random, a split second thought i had... So my little bro was over at my apt. to help me out with my garden, and before hand he went to take a piss, so i grabbed two cups of water, filled one up half way, and the other all the way (i just wanted to make it different, to see which one he would pick, its a psychological thing) so i took both cups into the bathroom right after he was done and said "bro... pick one" he's like, "whaaaaa? why" i said "no time man, pick one" so he picked the half full one, and as soon as he grabbed it, i threw my full cup of water right in his face!!
> 
> ...




LOL! I'd be PISSED if someone threw a cup of water in my face!

If he'd of picked the other glass, would you have done the same thing? Was it some sort of retaliation for picking the wrong amount!?

LOL you crazy dude!


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 11, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> LOL! I'd be PISSED if someone threw a cup of water in my face!
> 
> If he'd of picked the other glass, would you have done the same thing? Was it some sort of retaliation for picking the wrong amount!?
> 
> LOL you crazy dude!


Nope, i just wanted to see what his reaction would be because i thought it would be funny... i have a weird sense of humor lol. Try it with someone you know isn't going to retaliate by punching you in the face, it's super fun AND funny!


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 13, 2012)

So where's that BJ video?!

lol


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 13, 2012)

Zaehet Strife said:


> Nope, i just wanted to see what his reaction would be because i thought it would be funny... i have a weird sense of humor lol. Try it with someone you know isn't going to retaliate by punching you in the face, it's super fun AND funny!


and LOL! I don't know anyone who wouldn't punch me in the face for that!


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 13, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> So where's that BJ video?!
> 
> lol


You'd have to give me directions on how to upload it and put it on here.


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 13, 2012)

With the first site I linked to, register (free, took me 5 seconds), then click the 'upload' tab at the top and the directions are really basic

With the second one click the 'browse' tab, find your video on your comp (500MB limit, you're a minute man anyway so that's OK lol jk), click upload, post link


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## ZEMIC (Oct 13, 2012)

YES!!!, I havn't but it's not that i'm too busy or no time or camera, keep it real my "mini me" is tooo mini to throw him on front street like that, I could not do that to us. so you guys must be packing. but I think girls are more likely to expise themselfs. and I would have to say it depends, if the homie knows bout the pics then he has no right thy shouldn't be on the internet it's world wide. but if he doesn't then yeah he might. personally more at my bitch. I just don't see me rolling the dice on a friendship just cause I rub a few out . how would you tell your "friend" anyhow? I couldn't tell him, I smoke a 8ther blunt and yank it to his girl for thirtyseven minutes, so i wouldn't volenteer any info of that sort.


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 13, 2012)

Ok, how would i put the video on here after i upload it on there??

Edit: I'm going to post one of my ex girlfriend instead of the one i have now, hope that is sufficient.

Omfg dudes i just watched it again and you guys are going to laugh your asses off!!!!

Better get some plus rep for this shit, its uploading on that website right now.


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 13, 2012)

Better get some plus rep for this, enjoy my friends. Lmfao! Especially you Pad my man!

http://www.sexykarma.com/gonewild/video/blowjob-from-my-ex-xaaLNyccjJu.html

Any comments from this clip of me and my ex is more than welcome 

(Edit: you'll have to turn it up to see what she says, its really fuckin funny)


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## ArcticGranite (Oct 13, 2012)

Well call me Chad! Cool jammies, nice prong, accommodating female, great sound. What's not to like? Rockstar.


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 14, 2012)

Zaehet Strife said:


> Better get some plus rep for this, enjoy my friends. Lmfao! Especially you Pad my man!
> 
> http://www.sexykarma.com/gonewild/video/blowjob-from-my-ex-xaaLNyccjJu.html
> 
> ...


Lmfao dude delivers! 

That chick is a trooper, if I tried to pull the same shit with chicks I've been with, no BJ would have ever taken place.. Curious what made her an ex, she's pretty cute too

How old are you again Z? 

I might have a sexual encounter with a friend in a few days, I'll try my hardest to get some footage. 

+Rep


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## tyler.durden (Oct 14, 2012)

I know that chick! JK. The Z-man putting his money where his (and her) mouth is! She couldn't have been more turned on knowing she'd be watched by strangers, I bet she didn't know how strange her audience would turn out to be  She's a little cutie, and the audio was awesome. You even got away with slapping her, wow. I felt so wrong watching that, but I fought through it and busted a nice nut anyway. Thanks for sharing, +rep...


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 14, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> I know that chick! JK. The Z-man putting his money where his (and her) mouth is! She couldn't have been more turned on knowing she'd be watched by strangers, I bet she didn't know how strange her audience would turn out to be  She's a little cutie, and the audio was awesome. You even got away with slapping her, wow. I felt so wrong watching that, but I fought through it and busted a nice nut anyway. Thanks for sharing, +rep...


It was great, but her technique was terrible! She barely sucked on the head and didn't even bother trying to deepthroat! Same issue with most chicks I've been with, too much hand, not enough mouth. D a f u q? I can give myself a handjob bitch! SUCK MY DICK! NO HAND! Fuck your hand, you don't know what you're doing, use your MOUTH! 

Props for her enthusiasm though, that's for sure!


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 14, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> It was great, but her technique was terrible! She barely sucked on the head and didn't even bother trying to deepthroat! Same issue with most chicks I've been with, too much hand, not enough mouth. D a f u q? I can give myself a handjob bitch! SUCK MY DICK! NO HAND! Fuck your hand, you don't know what you're doing, use your MOUTH!
> 
> Props for her enthusiasm though, that's for sure!


Also, no homo, nice sized D and your voice is audible chocolate, you should narrate audio books! hahahaha!


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## tyler.durden (Oct 14, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> It was great, but her technique was terrible! She barely sucked on the head and didn't even bother trying to deepthroat! Same issue with most chicks I've been with, too much hand, not enough mouth. D a f u q? I can give myself a handjob bitch! SUCK MY DICK! NO HAND! Fuck your hand, you don't know what you're doing, use your MOUTH!
> 
> Props for her enthusiasm though, that's for sure!


Yeah, awful technique, she gagged with effort a couple times and had a some watery eyes action going. I feel the same way with the hands, a little hand action is okay but it should be 80% hands-off. Gotta love Z, he's got balls. I seen 'em!


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## tyler.durden (Oct 14, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Also, no homo, nice sized D and your voice is audible chocolate, you should narrate audio books! hahahaha!


I think he's got a future in the porn biz if he so chooses. Z, PM me if you need help with the casting calls...


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 14, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Yeah, awful technique, she gagged with effort a couple times and had a some watery eyes action going. I feel the same way with the hands, a little hand action is okay but it should be 80% hands-off. Gotta love Z, he's got balls. I seen 'em!


Hold your thumb in your fist, it helps with the gag reflex (TELL THAT CHICK Z!), that has made pornstars careers! 

Sasha Grey, Annette Schwarz, Charlie Chase, and the queen of the DEEEEEEEEpthroat, Bobbi Bliss, show your chick those ladies! OMFG didn't know that was possible! lol! 

Z's a trooper! Dude is my internet BRO, just like you TD! You guys are much more than I could hope to have in person, no joke, from the heart, both of you guys are more than internet buds, I'd be honored to share a drink with you guys. Heis and MF included.


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## tyler.durden (Oct 14, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Hold your thumb in your fist, it helps with the gag reflex (TELL THAT CHICK Z!), that has made pornstars careers!
> 
> Sasha Grey, Annette Schwarz, Charlie Chase, and the queen of the DEEEEEEEEpthroat, Bobbi Bliss, show your chick those ladies! OMFG didn't know that was possible! lol!
> 
> Z's a trooper! Dude is my internet BRO, just like you TD! You guys are much more than I could hope to have in person, no joke, from the heart, both of you guys are more than internet buds, I'd be honored to share a drink with you guys. Heis and MF included.


Back at you, Pad. That would be a great guy's night out, throw in those DT ladies and we'd _really _have a party


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 14, 2012)

Holy shit you guys are fuckin hilarious!! Pad i'm 26 now, i think i took that video a year or two ago. Thanks for all the compliments means a lot, it's the coolness my friends here on RIU that made me comfortable sharing that. I agree too, a night out with you bro's would be the fuckin shit! We'd be taking home a lady for each of us for sure, id make damn sure about that! And if we couldn't, know damn well id be sharing with my bro's  (I actually tag-teamed the girl in the video with one of my best buds, before hand we made up a secret super awesome high five technique lol)

I'm really comfortable with my sexuality, sucks that im not gay because id have twice the fun lol. I've shown that video to some of my close friends and i consider a few of you on here close friends as well over the couple years ive been on here, you know who you are. 

I have another video of her after i taught her a thing or two about how to suck a dick, it's a little embarrassing though because she had just gotten out of rehab and i hadn't fucked in a month or so, so it's not very long after penetration that i bust it. If you want to see, i can put up a video with a password, pm me for the password and i'll hook you up. It's got her deep throating it the whole damn way and a badass cumshot at the end, you dudes would probably love it.

Glad i could hook my bro's up, you guys mean a lot to me, i even sent ol' Heis a pm wishing him well on his back pains ya know? I've met some really great people on here, honest and sincere, and from what i can expect, cool as shit to boot. So thankful i took the opportunity and spent the time to get to know some of you guys, because you fucking ROCK! Like i said, you know who you are.

+rep if i had any left to give you guys


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 14, 2012)

So what's up with Heis' back?


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 14, 2012)

He hasn't written me back yet, so it's prolly getting worse. Not really sure, im thinking from physical exertion of some sort. Hope he gets better soon.


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 15, 2012)

Zaehet Strife said:


> He hasn't written me back yet, so it's prolly getting worse. Not really sure, im thinking from physical exertion of some sort. Hope he gets better soon.


Dude's doing better, finally got some meds. 

Interesting feeling when you actually miss a dude you've never met before, eh? Heis is like the godfather of reason around here, I've learned so much and developed into a much better person solely because of him and the things he's taught me. I love the internet.


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## tyler.durden (Oct 15, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Dude's doing better, finally got some meds.
> 
> Interesting feeling when you actually miss a dude you've never met before, eh? Heis is like the godfather of reason around here, I've learned so much and developed into a much better person solely because of him and the things he's taught me. I love the internet.


Same here, Pad, Heis is the shit. I don't think I've ever met anyone who thinks more clearly and logically, and I have also learned so much in many different areas because of him. He's become one of my favorite authors  Wow, where's the funeral? We're talking about him like he's dead. Get well soon, Heis!


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 15, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> Heis is like the godfather of reason


I completely agree, i have learned so much from him. Hies is the fucking masta.


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 15, 2012)




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## tyler.durden (Oct 15, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


>


LMFAO! +rep...


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 15, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


>


So fuckin EPIC!!!

(I find myself rep'n people for the simplest little thing just so i can rep you guys more lol)


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## Heisenberg (Oct 16, 2012)

lol thanks for the kind words guys. As of now I am able to lay here on the floor with relatively little pain, and I can walk around for a while just fine, but I still can't sit without being extremely uncomfortable. This was a flareup of an existing injury I received when I had a furniture delivery job several years ago. Truth is, when you are maneuvering heavy furniture around people's homes, it's often not possible to lift properly. Bad thing is I don't even know what aggravated it this time or what to be more careful about. Sometimes just sitting a certain way and coughing can trigger it, but it usually isn't this severe.

Luckily my best friend lives next door to me and took care of me, although he is moving today! Jus so happens I was completely out of bud or hash or anything. I have the trim to make hash but obviously can't with my back out. So out of desperation I went to search the floor under my drying area and low and behold an entire branch of Lemon Skunk had fallen into a vase I keep on the floor. This was the first time I have actually experienced a clear medicinal aspect to cannabis. I could actually feel my lower back relax and loosen up as I smoked, and the muscle twitching stopped.

I entertained myself by watching the entire Walking Dead series and about 50 episodes of Forensic Files I had downloaded. I can report the healing power of horror works no better than the healing power of laughter.


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## tyler.durden (Oct 16, 2012)

^^ So glad to hear that you are healing, but so sorry to hear that your best friend is moving. That was a great situation for you, I know it's not easy for you to let new people into your life. I'm getting older and after I play a challenging match of tennis I get a little stiff and sore. MJ always lessens my pain, cool that you found that lone branch of bud to toke on. My lower back was iffy a few months ago so I started doing some core training (back extensions and crunches, which I hate) and I can really feel the difference. I don't really enjoy horror but I love the Walking Dead, and I'm a different person after watching that first season it was so gritty and real. Good first episode this season, can't wait to see how it develops...

P.S. - My favorite line of the series is in the second season: Hershal - 'Well, the Lord promised to raise the dead, I just thought he had something a little _different_ in mind...'


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## Heisenberg (Oct 16, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> ^^ So glad to hear that you are healing, but so sorry to hear that your best friend is moving. That was a great situation for you, I know it's not easy for you to let new people into your life. I'm getting older and after I play a challenging match of tennis I get a little stiff and sore. MJ always lessens my pain, cool that you found that lone branch of bud to toke on. My lower back was iffy a few months ago so I started doing some core training (back extensions and crunches, which I hate) and I can really feel the difference. I don't really enjoy horror but I love the Walking Dead, and I'm a different person after watching that first season it was so gritty and real. Good first episode this season, can't wait to see how it develops...


Having my best friend close was great in many ways, ill miss the late night smoke sessions and the companionship, but it's also like being in a relationship with his GF where I get none of the good stuff (sex, intimacy) and all of the fallout (animosity by association, threats of snitching) when they fight. I'll gladly trade some distance between him and I for the elimination of all that.

I plan to start some core exercises when I am able. I understand the best way to prevent back problems is exercise and strength. The back is funny that way. Not working it enough can be just as bad as working it too hard.

I liked the first episode of Walking Dead this season. Season 2 sorta lost me with all the talking and drama. Not one of them did anything to fortify the farm. Why not dig a trench around the perimeter? And why keep going into town for every little thing, bring the supplies back to the farm! I also didn't like the time lapse between season 2 and 3. Nothing happened during the winter that was worthy of story telling? They met no new members, not one of them died? Pretty weak.


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## tyler.durden (Oct 16, 2012)

^^ Oh yeah, I've been there with best friends and their GFs, that's why I don't share my growing with anyone. Some crazy bitch along the way would turn me in, I'm sure. I've heard your same complaint about season 2 being too slow and dramatic, I really liked the character development and the slower tension, rallying their hope to find Sylvia, and the build up of the Shane, Rick and Lori love/hate triangle. I wondered the same thing about going into town, why not send all the guys and bring back truckloads of supplies? I didn't think about them fortifying the farm, Rick and Shane fucked up on that one. I understand why they glossed over the winter in order to get to the prison, but I would have liked to see more of the planning and anxiety about taking the prison in the first place. The scariest thing to me right now is the possibility of seeing a sex scene between Daryl and Carol, yuck. On the other hand, can't wait to see Carl get some Beth


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 16, 2012)

So what's up with the zombies in that show barely creeping along n shit? In Dawn of the Dead, the new one, they're sprinting at your ass, that's the scary type of zombie, with these fucks I'd get my 9 iron out and stroll casually down main street without a care in the world, what's so scary about them? That alone completely eliminates the fear aspect of the entire show..


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## tyler.durden (Oct 16, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> So what's up with the zombies in that show barely creeping along n shit? In Dawn of the Dead, the new one, they're sprinting at your ass, that's the scary type of zombie, with these fucks I'd get my 9 iron out and stroll casually down main street without a care in the world, what's so scary about them? That alone completely eliminates the fear aspect of the entire show..


Some of the zombies in WD are slower, but there are many throughout the series that will chase your ass full speed. And there are just SO many of them, they surround your ass then you're in real trouble


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 16, 2012)

I've seen an episode or two, too much romantic type stuff for my taste too.. 

Do they have limited resources to work with? Guns, ammo, food, water, etc.? Is the whole world zombies, have they explained what happened? What are they trying to do, what's their eventual goal?


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 16, 2012)

I've been thinking about starting to watch it... though im not big on drama, i like action much more. My favorite zombie movie is 28 days later... so fucking epic, with such a creepy atmosphere.


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## ClaytonBigsby (Oct 17, 2012)

I am not a big zombie movie fan, but that 28 Days Later was great! Having them act like crazy animals was scarier than hell.


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## spandy (Oct 23, 2012)

I usually find something better to do just before I whip it out and scan it, so sorry no pics of my dick for you.


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## Hal Incandenza (Oct 24, 2012)

Only one of my penii are on the internet, I might upload the other one some day.


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## Padawanbater2 (Oct 24, 2012)

How many peni do you have?


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## Hal Incandenza (Oct 24, 2012)

Padawanbater2 said:


> How many peni do you have?


What kind of question is that? I've got the normal amount of peni.


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## tyler.durden (Oct 24, 2012)

Can you imagine if we had two penises one on top of the other, and the horror on your girlfriend's face? I'd call them Pinky and Stinky, they'd switch identities depending if she was facing toward or away from you


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## cannabineer (Oct 24, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Can you imagine if we had two penises one on top of the other, and the horror on your girlfriend's face? I'd call them Pinky and Stinky, they'd switch identities depending if she was facing toward or away from you


Shocking!  cn


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## donmagicjuan (Oct 24, 2012)

jon bobbit would of had a back-up, if she didnt get both...oww!


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## cannabineer (Oct 24, 2012)




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## Heisenberg (Oct 24, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Can you imagine if we had two penises one on top of the other, and the horror on your girlfriend's face? I'd call them Pinky and Stinky, they'd switch identities depending if she was facing toward or away from you


_Diphallia is a rare medical condition in which a male infant is born with two penises._

"Most diphalluses lie side by side and are of equal size, but they can be seated atop one another, with one distinctly larger than the other."


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## tyler.durden (Oct 24, 2012)

Heisenberg said:


> _Diphallia is a rare medical condition in which a male infant is born with two penises._
> 
> "Most diphalluses lie side by side and are of equal size, but they can be seated atop one another, with one distinctly larger than the other."


Actually, i was born with this condition and as I got older it just fused into one very large penis. Seriously, I wonder why I've never seen one of these guys in porn. I mean, I watch a _lot_ of porn...


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## UncleBuck (Oct 24, 2012)

Zaehet Strife said:


> Better get some plus rep for this, enjoy my friends. Lmfao! Especially you Pad my man!
> 
> http://www.sexykarma.com/gonewild/video/blowjob-from-my-ex-xaaLNyccjJu.html
> 
> ...


video does not exist, it tells me.


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## Zaehet Strife (Oct 25, 2012)

UncleBuck said:


> video does not exist, it tells me.


I took the video down, but, if you would really like to see it, PM me and ill put it back up and send you a link. This goes for everyone.


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## Hal Incandenza (Oct 25, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Actually, i was born with this condition and as I got older it just fused into one very large penis. Seriously, I wonder why I've never seen one of these guys in porn. I mean, I watch a _lot_ of porn...


Oh, it's out there. You've just gotta look. There is a porn for every concept or thing in the known universe.


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## UncleBuck (Oct 25, 2012)

Zaehet Strife said:


> I took the video down, but, if you would really like to see it, PM me and ill put it back up and send you a link. This goes for everyone.


you're too kind.

i'll consult the devil and angel on each shoulder and see what they say about it.


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## Hal Incandenza (Oct 25, 2012)

[video=youtube;DrhOc4qbpvk]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DrhOc4qbpvk&amp;feature=related[/video]


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## FlowerPower! (Oct 26, 2012)

My dick is too small for the Internet. You wouldn't be able to get a close look and you'd have to put your face to the screen! You might touch it with your nose!


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## Shannon Alexander (Oct 26, 2012)

tyler.durden said:


> Actually, i was born with this condition and as I got older it just fused into one very large penis. Seriously, I wonder why I've never seen one of these guys in porn. I mean, I watch a _lot_ of porn...


Are you seriously saying you haven't seen the video of the guy with two dicks..? You must not have been watching porn for long my friend..


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## rockyard (Jul 5, 2013)

An ex girlfriend posted pictures of me on the internet. I told her to post the ones of me sucking cock. She later became an ex wife.


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## Villane (Jul 5, 2013)

I could never fit it all in the camera.


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## BurnRide (Jul 5, 2013)

I use wideangle for that


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## BarnBuster (Oct 12, 2014)

bump


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