Naming neo's New Helper

lokie said:

Nobody cat eat 50 eggs.

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I wouldn't bet against Rocky

Singlemalt said:

^^^^This. Neo, it's time to test his design specs, stress testing is called for

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Have him drink a gallon of milk in a hour

SH420

shrxhky420 said:

Have him drink a gallon of milk in a hour

SH420

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As a warm up

if you all haven't seen "cool hand luke" you need to...awesome movie, about a guy that ain't bad, but just can't be good...and it's the source of

Call him UncleBuck, then you won’t feel so bad if you have to smack him around a little.

The story today is that he called off work. Because his wife was going into labor. But turns out she just had "pains". Taking covers off of pools by yourself is challenging and tiresome.

well, when he does show up for work, get a lot of calls that you have to take care of, keep walking away and motioning for him to keep working, then stand there and watch him sweat while you enjoy the breeze

You sir are an evil genius.


Edit: Pretend there's a picture of Snidely Whiplash here.
(Damn glitchy site)

neosapien said:

The story today is that he called off work. Because his wife was going into labor. But turns out she just had "pains". Taking covers off of pools by yourself is challenging and tiresome.

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Ask him tomorrow if they were heterochromatic pains, tell him you've heard they can exchange colors when they get upset.

So he has called off yet again saying "he thinks this is it". This will be the 3rd time in 2 weeks that he thought "this was it". The actual due date is the 30th, so not totally unbelievable but the false alarms could also just be a well played story to sleep in. Which I totally can't put past the guy. I'll just have to wait and see after the baby comes.

i think it's time for a new helper....get a gay guy, they'll never pull this shit

And another "false alarm". Never had any false alarms with my wife. Even if it is true that they are in fact genuine "false alarms", I imagine the doctors hate them lol.

neosapien said:

And another "false alarm". Never had any false alarms with my wife. Even if it is true that they are in fact genuine "false alarms, I imagine the doctors hate them lol.

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Nah they don't give a shit, the highly trained OB nurses usually make the call while the OBs are down in the OR eating our food. If this is a first baby they are usually late, not early with PLENTY of time to get to the hospital.

neosapien said:

And another "false alarm". Never had any false alarms with my wife. Even if it is true that they are in fact genuine "false alarms", I imagine the doctors hate them lol.

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I predict that once the baby is there, he'll come up with a whole phalanx of emergencies, excuses, unanticipated pressing commitments. I don't think you can rescue this one.

@neosapien
Have you decided on a name for this yutz? I'm kinda torn now, thinking he may not last to deserve a name. I agree with CN, the dude will use every excuse in the book; "baby has sniffles and a rash, can't come to work today", as if watching it will cure it.

Singlemalt said:

@neosapien
Have you decided on a name for this yutz? I'm kinda torn now, thinking he may not last to deserve a name. I agree with CN, the dude will use every excuse in the book; "baby has sniffles and a rash, can't come to work today", as if watching it will cure it.

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Of course watching it might cure it, after all it's the thought that counts

FIRED...... sounds like a good name for this slacker.

So the story of the day for the false alarm is… his dog had an accident in the bed and they thought her water broke.

Singlemalt said:

@neosapien
Have you decided on a name for this yutz? I'm kinda torn now, thinking he may not last to deserve a name. I agree with CN, the dude will use every excuse in the book; "baby has sniffles and a rash, can't come to work today", as if watching it will cure it.

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Not yet. The other guys here call him Lurch from Addams family fame. I think he looks more like Uncle Fester though myself.

they can't tell the difference between water and dog piss?

and they're going to be taking care of a child?