Pix That Make You LOL-Warning-SNWS

cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
It was the punchline to a joke. Here's a c&p version. cn

St. Peter was guarding the Pearly Gates, waiting for new souls coming to heaven. He saw Jesus walking by and caught his attention. "Jesus, could you mind the gate while I go do an errand?"

"Sure," replied Jesus. "What do I have to do?"

"Just find out about the people who arrive. Ask about their background, their family, and their lives. Then decide if they deserve entry into Heaven."

"Sounds easy enough. OK."

So Jesus manned the gates for St. Peter. The first person to approach the gates was a wrinkled old man. Jesus summoned him to sit down and sat across from him. Jesus peered at the old man and asked, "What did you do for a living?"

The old man replied, "I was a carpenter."

Jesus remembered his own earthly existence and leaned forward. "Did you have any family?" he asked.

"Yes, I had a son, but I lost him."

Jesus leaned forward some more. "You lost your son? Can you tell me about him?"

"Well, he had holes in his hands and feet."

Jesus leaned forward even more and whispered, "Father?"

The old man leaned forward and whispered, "Pinocchio?"
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patlpp

patlpp

New Member
Oh, that cleared it right the f**k up. For shits sake, I don't get the punch!! I'm dumb, pls explain the growing nose part.
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
patlpp said:
Oh, that cleared it right the f**k up. For shits sake, I don't get the punch!! I'm dumb, pls explain the growing nose part.
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I wish I could find it online, but when I was MUCH younger there was a Playboy cartoon with a wooden boy with his head tucked between the nubile shanks of a statuesque young confection. With a sigh she said "Ohh tell another lie, Pinocchio!" :joint::bigjoint: cn

 
patlpp

patlpp

New Member
cannabineer said:
I wish I could find it online, but when I was MUCH younger there was a Playboy cartoon with a wooden boy with his head tucked between the nubile shanks of a statuesque young confection. With a sigh she said "Ohh tell another lie, Pinocchio!" :joint::bigjoint: cn

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1972ish. You fuck Do I know you? Where did U libve in the 70's. I'm freaking the fiuck out rite now.
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
patlpp said:
1972ish. You fuck Do I know you? Where did [you] live in the 70's. I'm freaking the fuck out rite now.
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Then I must have seen it in a paperback compilation titled "Why do I have an irresisitible urge to laugh when i'm making love" or similar when I was fifteen, a few years later.
Unless you grew up in an East Coast suburb in the '60s/'70s, chances are we never met.

Oh and I wish I DID fuck. :mrgreen: cn
 
D

Dirty Harry

Well-Known Member
And they say that driving while texting is distracting. Try catching a golf ball with your car while driving 120MPH.

[video=youtube;VgKMGwfo5sg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VgKMGwfo5sg&feature=player_embedded[/video]
 
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