Just Wrote These

mahlye

Well-Known Member
This poem is about a problem that I used to have.


where do I run when I am trying to escape myself?
how can I elude self infliction and curb my addiction,
and stray the emulation that has garnered me?
and is this pestilence that inhibits me,
only the resentment that asphyxiates my being?
where could I go when this is what I am seeing -
selfless redemption, no comprehension, the austere reflection in the mirror
how do I dodge my most prevalent obstruction -
My own self destruction
Fury is a flame that too often leaps
And my control has left me only ashes to reap
I long to realize the tranquil steps of redemption
The simplicity of calmness that has been absent from my comprehension
One day I will swallow my fury with pride and vehemence
And rest at last…anger will no longer be my greatest grievance


These are lyrics that I wrote recently.


It’s all starting to slip from me
The dream I’ve been living in, I’m more awake to my reality
In a sense, I saw this coming for a while
I didn’t want you to see me despondent, I’m not a fan for melancholy
So I kept on a smile and I created a mask for myself to wear
I’ve been holding up an act for too long - I’m not holding it up forever, I don’t believe I’m that strong
Let me articulate what I hate the most,
Those who convince themselves that they will be alright
But when they lay awake at night they know they’re far from being fine
Instead of beating the grief, they are forever in search for security
Building wall’s higher and higher to keep away the pain
The wall’s will get too high and your collateral will subside
Keep building them up, but sooner then you know
You’ll be dead inside
I don’t want to become hollow and never rest like the rest of you
I’m just tired of false hope
I must have pulled the shortest string
Because of the failure I know… it’s been so hard to change anything
I’ll overcome regardless of everything
Beat what I see in the mirror, find a new song to sing
It’s just hard when you’re always losing
Now the battle’s being fought are not those of my choosing
I know my turn outs, my security will deteriorate
So I’ll just live day by day, cursing every breath I take
At least now I’m on the right road, not like rest of you
 
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