Discussion in 'Stonable Quotables' started by keysareme, Mar 8, 2014.
What's green and smells like bacon?
Kermit the frog's fingers.
Every Morning,after the little French Man boarded the bus for the ride to work,he would sniff his finger and say"Ah Fife"One day the construction worker he always sat beside asked him,"How come every morning when you get on the bus,you always smell your finger and say Ah Fife?Well I finger my wife every morning before I head off to work,so I can remember her scent all day.Hmm said the construction worker,The next morning the little FrenchMan boarder took his seat,smelled his finger Ahh Fife,he said,Then the construction worker,started at his elbow sniffed down to his fingers,Ahhh Bertha He said.
I see Bertha has joined the ultimate fisters club.
A Blonde walks into a vets office with a goldfish bowl,What seems to be the problem with your gold fish?He has seizures she said,the vet looked at the fish swimming peacefully in the bowl,He looks fine to me said the vet.She reached in the bowl picked up the fish and laid it on the table,as the fish jumped around,the blonde asked,What do you call that?
How do you turn a blonde into a brunette? Flip her upside down.
Jane was sitting in the waiting room of her gynecologists office when her doctor walked by."Hi Doctor Jim,"Jane said as he walked by.He gave a cordial Hello as he went by.Jane was kinda perplexed by his response, even though he had said Hello,he acted like he didn't know her.Anyway she was called back to the exam room,she undressed put on her gown and waited for the Doctor,Dr Jim came in sat down on his stool",Oh Hi Jane" ,Dr Jim said,I'm sorry I didn't recognize you in the waiting room,I'm not to good with faces.
What do you call an Aboriginal pregnancy test? A banana!
Instructions say to peel. Insert halfway. And leave for 5mins.
If you find its half eaten. Congratulations you've got another monkey on the way.
DAMN, I haven't seen you about since Hotrod Harley was here
i'm on almost every day bakatare.. i don't post a ton, but like i said, i'm on pretty much daily, reading a lot of threads / posts.
I'll always remember you becouse your name reminds me of bukkake
Q why is santa so jolly
A becuse he knows where all the naughty girls live
A penis says to his testicles, “get ready boys we’re going to a party.” The testicles reply, “bullshit! Whenever you take us to a party you always go inside and leave us banging at the back door!”
Do you know why jew's don't eat pussy?
It's too close to the gas chamber.
Why did the scarecrow win a Nobel Prize?
He was out standing in his field.
Separate names with a comma.