Great Stoner Quotes

dead sleep on the couch pop up say ,"all in due time you will get the nugget" fall back asleep.

someone tap him out the window, he's cashed

I'm sorry officer.. Honestly, I'd swear I'd let you hit it.. but there's none left.

*Actually didn't go to jail! (idk how though, that window was renamed 'the chimney'.)

pulled over for doin 120mph, cop says "I been waitn for you all day"... i got here as fast as i could officer

"We should, like, totally make a instrument that plays, like, electronic sounds. And we should call it a psychedelitron."
"Dude, there already is one, and it's called a synthesizer."
"Oh yeah."
*the sound of 4 totally stoned guys laughing their asses off goes here*

will this make my soilder stand at attention?
no, this will make you forget that he isnt standing at attention

"You start thinking about how fun it was to play games like Battleship when you were a kid, and how as we get older we forget how to just have fun so you say guess what, I'm gonna make a game and it involves a porcupine and a baseball bat and i'm gonna try to kill a porcupine with a baseball bat but you dont know where to find one so you do a websearch but people dont sell porcupines on the internet, so you say ya know what world, you've got me cornered again. I'm gonna roll another joint."

.......It goes something like that

I take my bongos wherever my bong goes.

why drink and drive when u can smoke and fly

"i dont know where i am but thats exactly where i want to be." - this guy -->http://theinternettaughtmealliknow.blogspot.com/?zx=7d19e007e49edd27

my friend from school..pretty interesting guy

"see i figure i study high, take the tests high, get high scores"
-how high

would a booger be a fruit or a vegitable? thats the real question

popeyes chicken is the shiznit

(so is this thread)

smoking cigarettes is about looking cool. Smoking weed is about feeling cool

"GREENS!!!!!" "DEUCE!!!" OR "CHEECH" "CHONG"!! "awww **** you i always get a cashbowl"

Erniedytn said:

The pictures:
Funny t-shirts, Funny shirts, Crazy t-shirts, Crazy shirts, Cool t-shirts, Cool shirts


The quote is from the "Poppler" episode of Futurama where Lrrrr eats the hippie at the end.

Click to expand...

I love futurama, and i love bud. youre the man dude.

Whenever i stretch my arms out my ears pop so this one time i was smoking with some mates and i yawned and stretched and i was like 'holy crap i went deaf for a second there...but now i can hear EVERYTHING...i can hear my cat think.' I swear to god i could hear my cat talking hahah shit i was sooo blazed.

"Man, why the fuck do all the stoner commercials come on when we're baked? Like, that dude's high, and this chick's blazed, and here's a fucking commercial for Taco Bell. Goddamnit, let's get in the car. We've got a dozen tacos to pay for in spare change.."

damn...you got down syndrome so bad you prolly got up, left, and right syndrome too

Chuck Norris fucked your mom, and you dad hi 5d him.

Chuck Norris Fucks every girl once a month.