How To Launder My Money?

1.) Steal underpants
2.) ???
3.) Profit!

Also the fact that he had several hundred thousand stuffed in his roof like that's something to do. I doubt your illegal money stuffed inside your flammable roof was insured. Or not anticipating this problem before accumulating several hundred thousand dollars.

Dameon said:

WARNING WARNING WARNING, READ THIS BEFORE TRAVELING SOUTH!!!!!!:
Listen to that guy. Silver is very very important for making certain pharmaceuticals and gold, well gold is gold. Buy Buy Buy! Also if you go to any country in Latin America, or anywhere south of the USA, bring money to bribe people with!!! This is very important. This is especailly so if you travel by boat. If this is the case, yuo should have no problem finding asylum. Trust only your translators, pay them the best and ditch your translator and find a NEW trustworthy translator every so often. These tips might save your life. Let NOBODY know you are carrying large amounts of cash or you are DEAD. I am saying all this because i have been to Venezuela, Trinidad, Cuba along with others,and have faced the military, gov lawyers, crooks, and diplomats and that was just in Venezuela! Be careful and may GOD protect you on your path, brother.

Click to expand...

LOL are you serious? write a book son.

it's so easy just contact me

[email protected]

with only a couple hundred thousand i dont think its enough to move to brazil and build a house. i normal house cost about 200-300 thousand in the us for a nice 4 bedroom house. and brazil seems kinda expensive unless your going to the amazon to live. so theres a couple hundred thousand for a house. and then depending on how many you have in your family it could be expensive. i guess you could have a job there. but i personally would rather keep doing what your if it is working and you dont think your gonna get caught. and just have a shit ton of money to retire and then live good them. retiring can cost a lot of money since you pick up hobbies and shit that cost money. im already thinking about retiring and im not out of college yet haha
i would also burry your cash. not have it in the roof. something extreme could happen. and you could lose it all

I'd just buy boxes and boxes of starburst. Then I would break open all the packages and sell them as single pieces of candy in the parking lot of the grocery store. Fool proof.

Buy gold coins that are old, i forget the term, but if there collector coins you donot have to even report them to us government.

Best way to launder money.. Coin operated Car Wash, key words: "Coin Operated"
Let's say your a baller and have 100,000 dollars dirty money. You open an and operate a coin operated car wash with 2 vending machines, coin operated vaccumes, ect.. When it comes time to pay your fed. taxes, no one really knows how much money you made during the year. Let's say you make 15,000 dollars clean money thru the car wash, add 10 grand to that and claim 25,000 on your taxes. You have no employies, if you do all the work yourself, and your have your hustle on the side, take your money off the top to pay for expensives: soap, water, snacks, electric bill, ect.. It would take a few years but its a good "front" business. That or a laundry.. lmao Hhhhhmmmmm.. what do you think? Feedback?

I'm surprised I haven't seen the most obvious one yet. Whole or universal life insurance is where most of the wealthy love to protect their money from the government. No government agency can touch life insurance(as of a couple of years ago, don't think it has changed, but I'm not certain). That's how OJ Simpson has avoided paying money to the Goldman's. You deposit the money with a life insurance company and borrow against it tax free. It also works as an investment account. Make certain your premiums are paid though, you let them lapse and everyone will be all over those accounts.

If you are smart enough to make a "few houndred thousand" then sureley you should be smart enough to get it to where you want to go! JMHO Wish I had your problem! LOL

if your stupid enough to ask this question on a forum, you,ve already lost it and just dont no it yet....peace

Better call Saul!

Ever heard of Google? Here are a few good pieces on how money laundering is typically accomplished:

http://www.wisebread.com/how-to-launder-money
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2836/how-would-i-go-about-laundering-money
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Money_laundering
http://money.howstuffworks.com/money-laundering1.htm

I'd only things I'd add are:

-Physically trying to smuggle large sums of cash is risky and stupid.
-The less money you're trying to launder, the easier it should be to pull it off.

You sir are retarded but in the small cance that you actually have that much money to launder it could take you at least 2 years to get rid off.

Firstly you will need to take out a house loan and buy a house. Yep that's right you will need more money, well you will need a house.

Secondly you need to start your own business, doesn't matter too much what it is but something where you can hide sales easily such as service, good choices are gardening, personal training, painting etc.

Now this is where things start to get a little confusing, start making extra repayments towards your house loan as soon as possible but no more then $2500.00 a month. Anything more then that could be suspicous and will be recorded to be sent to your country's security and investment commission.

Now while doing this make as many minimal renovations to your house. No pools or Saunas but a small spa is fine
Make little renovations such as repainting the house, new kitchen and interior.

While doing this go buy name brand things that aren't overly standing out so no ferrari's but maybe a lexus, something that cost more then its worth simply because of the brand, buy a TV, computer, furniture etc. All this stuff can be sold when you decide to move countries.

Now when you decide to move sell everything you own basically, house, company, items etc. pay of the entire house loan or whatever is left right there and then and what you have left over should be slightly less then what you have right now but it will be legitimate therefore have fun in te next country.

By the way everything I have said in this post is for educational purposes and I do not advocate the illegal money laundering system or fruad in any way.

salimin said:

it's so easy just contact me

[email protected]

Click to expand...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxwarning government agentxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

just move and have ur family send ur
cash weekly as needed western union

small business, small receipt book, service industry so books are ez.. you teach, instruct, babysit, etc... you make money, you pay taxes.. welcome to America..

Trade all that cash in for GOLD....and then bury most of your gold.

LoL... The op never responded past day 1.. But this bltch kept goin...

But i cant believe noone mentioned the one thing that was easy and actually works...

GAMBLING WINNINGS... DUH!!!!

Once a month or twice a month you go to a casino buy 10,000 in chips gamble with $100- for a lil bit.. Play the slots... Then cash the fvck out...

Then declare the gambling winnings on your tax's...

Easy Peezy Lemon Sqeazy....
(lol, Bobs Your Uncle...)

Open a t-shirt shop in Key West Fla