Good Cock is getting so expensive

Dyna Ryda

Well-Known Member
Seriously almost $9 a lb, wtf?! I know it's "free range cock" and "organic" but this price is ridiculous.

So I made lemon pepper cock tonight. Seasoned with a lemon from my Hawaiian lemon tree and black pepper. Pretty good cock but I've had better in my mouth.

 

UncleBuck

Well-Known Member
i have 4 black hens and a nice big white cock.

i've talked to all the neighbors about my white cock to make sure they don't mind. it's the suburbs, where people can sometimes get scornful if you have a nice white cock.

but they actually like my white cock, which is great. because my white cock protects the hens and will fertilize our eggs.

there are a lot of upsides to having a nice big white cock.
 

dannyboy602

Well-Known Member
My big white cock comes from a long line of big white cocks. Its certified organic. In fact its a certified organic organ. Its so big the doctor who circumsized me actually paid my parents for the privilege.
My cock is so brave he tried out for the navy seals but someone made a big stink about him only having one eye. He got in anyway. Somethin about the American Cocks with Disabilities Act. We're so proud.
 

Growan

Well-Known Member
My girlfriend used to have a cock. Nasty, violent cock it was too. Excellent for letting you know that people were approaching your home because they would invariably get set upon by my girlfriends angry aggressive cock.
It was unfortunate when my girlfriends cock took a dislike to children, because their faces were pretty much at the same height as my girlfriends cock.
Her Ex eventually cut the head off her cock, plucked and roasted it and served it up on a Sunday. She didn't partake, as she's vegetarian, but he tucked into her cock, and although a little tough, he thoroughly enjoyed it.

Edit: My girlfriend had a cock before we were together. Since we've been together she's dead against the idea of getting another cock. Another cock is the last thing she wants.
 

a senile fungus

Well-Known Member
My girlfriend used to have a cock. Nasty, violent cock it was too. Excellent for letting you know that people were approaching your home because they would invariably get set upon by my girlfriends angry aggressive cock.
It was unfortunate when my girlfriends cock took a dislike to children, because their faces were pretty much at the same height as my girlfriends cock.
Her Ex eventually cut the head off her cock, plucked and roasted it and served it up on a Sunday. She didn't partake, as she's vegetarian, but he tucked into her cock, and although a little tough, he thoroughly enjoyed it.

Edit: My girlfriend had a cock before we were together. Since we've been together she's dead against the idea of getting another cock. Another cock is the last thing she wants.
Have you considered introducing a second pussy into the relationship?
 

irish4:20

Well-Known Member
My girlfriend used to have a cock. Nasty, violent cock it was too. Excellent for letting you know that people were approaching your home because they would invariably get set upon by my girlfriends angry aggressive cock.
It was unfortunate when my girlfriends cock took a dislike to children, because their faces were pretty much at the same height as my girlfriends cock.
Her Ex eventually cut the head off her cock, plucked and roasted it and served it up on a Sunday. She didn't partake, as she's vegetarian, but he tucked into her cock, and although a little tough, he thoroughly enjoyed it.

Edit: My girlfriend had a cock before we were together. Since we've been together she's dead against the idea of getting another cock. Another cock is the last thing she wants.
 

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Growan

Well-Known Member
Have you considered introducing a second pussy into the relationship?
The trouble with a pussy is you don't really own it, it owns you. Say for example when we go away for a week working in the summer, what if your pussy's gone feral and no matter what you do, it won't come? The only option is to go to work without your pussy, and pussies being pussies, by the time you get back from the job somebody else is sat on their sofa, watching TV stroking your pussy.
 

Growan

Well-Known Member
C'mon guys, we're talking about cock not dicks again.

Sorry Dyna, I have another 'girlfriend/cock' story?
Yes? Good.

Same girlfriend, different cock. This cock belonged to a mate of ours. Huge cock. Even more angry than my girlfriends' cock.

Anyway, this cock would lay in wait, hide behind things and then when your back was turned would cock rush you and attack your ass. If you heard it coming you could quickly spin round at the last minute and hoof it just as it was launching up, and the combined rising force if the cock strike and your boot would send it heavenward, giving you enough time to turn tale and escape.

My girlfriend heard the approaching cock, so turned and kicked, but her slip on shoe fell off and landed several feet away. She started shouting for help, and I poked my head out of the door to see her balancing on one leg in a patch of mud desperatly trying to fend off our mates massive cock. By the time I got my boots on to help, our mate had arrived to remove his cock. I handed back her shoe, and we both stood agape as our mate calmly walked away stroking his massive angry cock and making cooing noises. He was the only one who could get his hands on that cock without risk of serious injury.

True story.
 
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