Voracious goat stories

I have 8 ... they are pretty freaking fun!

I think the goat should be more afraid of ME!


Birria, anyone???

Metasynth said:

I think the goat should be more afraid of ME!


Birria, anyone???

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Molto benne.

My goat story.

A stranger came up to me one day, I had never seen this man before.

With a heavy foreign accent he asked "Do you have any drugs?"
This surprised me as we were in a professional setting and not down on the street someplace.

"No" I replied, "No I have no drugs".
He smiled, shook his head and proceeded to write a note. "Do you have any goats?"
Surprised and smiling I told him no. And the day went on.

Later that day I was telling some friends of this odd occurrence.
"I know someone who sells goats." My friend told me. "Dustin, talk to Dustin he raises goats."

I had never met Dustin so I had to go hunt for someone I did not know to ask for a goat.

I was able to find Dustin, get a contact number and then go back to the stranger with his new goat contact information.

In that day I met 2 strangers, made 2 new friends and potentially hooked them up for a good business relationship.

Who knows Peco may now be able make his own P.A.G.A.N ritual costume.

I was always partial to Black Phillip, myself...






He changes shapes...

I was partying at a bar on Beale Street in Memphis one night, and went out on the patio for a smoke. Sat down at a table on the edge of the patio, table was touching a wrought iron fence. I didn't pay it any attention, just figured it was a decorative border. So I'm smoking, set my beer down, and when I turned around to pick it back up, a goat has his mouth through the fence, with my beer in it turned up. His chugging skills were impressive. I was pretty baked, so it didn't seem too out of the ordinary at the time

i've got a pretty good one that I wish I had on video.

Jamaica summer 2014. At my friends house with my son and all his kids. Bunch of older boys are closer to my son's age (who was 9 at the time), and one little guy @ 3yrs old. Mom is working on other side of the wall in their little 'bodega' style shop like you see from photos or videos of Jamaica selling food, snacks, juices, beers etc. Just off the main road. There is also a fence around the shop with some tables and chairs so ppl can sit down in the shade and relax. Between the house yard and the shop there is a 12 ft wall around it, which the older kids climb a metal pole and sit on top of while they eat their snacks and hang out (away from the little bro bothering them). Little man can't get up there so he spends his day pissed.

So somehow he made a game out of sneaking out of the shop to 2 houses down the street and freeing his buddy the baby goat. Baby Goat is a bad boy and gets tied up in the front yard bc it makes trouble if they leave it in the yard w other goats. Jr unties him and runs back home, and lets the goat into the shop yard. Goat and kid go crazy jumping off tables knocking over the trash can and generally fucking up the patio like its a mosh pit. Mom yells at kid to get the damn goat out of the yard and drags him by his arm as he is crying the whole way that he doesnt want to take the goat home. Within a few hours he has escaped, freed the goat, and brought him back to do more damage. We all died laughing every time, felt bad for my friends wife but even she couldn't help but crack up at the whole situation. It was more like - Again? Seriously? Good times.

tyler.durden said:

Gotta give some to get some...

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I had a boss once from Switzerland. Leggings were standard issue in the Army of the Red Knife.
Apparently they were called goatfuckers by the rank&file because they trapped the poor critter’s hind legs in correct position and orientation for yeah that.

My goat Frank ( named after Sinatra ) was the best goat ever. Just like one of the family. RIP.

I had a video of him hanging out with the wife and I eating spicy cheez it’s and laying out in the sun, drinking beer through a straw...... I mean drinking beer through a straw who the fuck does that.....


Frank gave his life protecting our other goat.... his lady friend Patches.
This is Patches trying to eat an apple.... bless her heart.

Bareback said:

.. I mean drinking beer through a straw who the fuck does that

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Someone who loves the feel of creamy head in his mouth. You’re welcome.

Long time ago had a girl friend who wanted to be a “urban farmer”, lived in a log cabin on a couple of acres. She thought that goats were cute and would be good for keeping the grass short. She got 3 or 4 Nubians and put them in a fenced in area where she kept her car parked. She came out the next morning to find them standing on the car roof eating the leaves off a tree that overhung the car. Trunk, hood and roof were dappled with so many indentations, all the panels had to be replaced. I did learn how to milk a goat, though.

BarnBuster said:

Long time ago had a girl friend who wanted to be a “urban farmer”, lived in a log cabin on a couple of acres. She thought that goats were cute and would be good for keeping the grass short. She got 3 or 4 Nubians and put them in a fenced in area where she kept her car parked. She came out the next morning to find them standing on the car roof eating the leaves off a tree that overhung the car. Trunk, hood and roof were dappled with so many indentations, all the panels had to be replaced. I did learn how to milk a goat, though.

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I have a friend who tells a story of a Jehovah Witness who came to visit and left the gate open... well the goat got out and was standing on top of her caddy when she left.... karma hehe.

I'll be making some Greek Ground Goat Gristle for nibbling on a little later today.

Milovan1 said:

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I'll be making some Greek Ground Goat Gristle for nibbling on a little later today.

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Tom Brady the GOAT (Greatest Of All Time) with his goat.






Milovan, Buc fan since '96. Go Bucs!