Some 'Sound' advice thread

[buzzardbreath]

Occasionally, arbitrary wisdom will flow from the lips of the RIU brilliant. Then a confusing but great satisfaction ensues in the minds of the slightly less ignorant, a neuron temporarily emits a glow and slowly dims out. Lets light up them there neurons!

Some sound advice:

1. Never dry hands with toilet paper, no matter how many ways you do it, joy will never follow.

2. If you're a big ole hairy chunker of a dude, never try on Under Armor compression shirts in front of your girl. Because...you know that feeling when you're trying to take off a tight shirt, and you're stuck with your arms up and the shirt's over your head? It's like that, except replace the shirt with a burmese python.

 

[Gary Goodson]

3. If your breath smells like testicles, then maybe you shouldn't stand so close to people when you talk to them?

Cock breath!

 

[Indacouch]

Don't try to save money on toilet paper .....you're ass will appreciate it ......((((for those of you who use toilet paper that is)))

 

[buzzardbreath]

4. Never find out if you erectillis penis will fit in a toilet paper roll. (another TP one, WTF)

 

[buzzardbreath]

Never number your sound advice because shit could get screwed up.

 

[Sir Napsalot]

Never trust the guy who prays the loudest in church

 

[tyler.durden]

Never Trust an Atom, They Make Up Everything...

 

[tyler.durden]

If You're Drinking to Forget, Pay in Advance

Whatever You Do, Always Give 100%. Unless You're Donating Blood.

Don't Give Up on Your Dream, Keep on Sleeping...

 

[Indacouch]

If You're Drinking to Forget, Pay in Advance

Whatever You Do, Always Give 100%. Unless You're Donating Blood.

Don't Give Up on Your Dream, Keep on Sleeping...

I feel like saying AMEN ....after I read that ....

 

[Eltomcat]

Don't try to save money on toilet paper .....you're ass will appreciate it ......((((for those of you who use toilet paper that is)))

No fucking joke yo! I bought some off brand tp(I didn't know, first time buying tp) I returned it, bought charmin ultra soft!
My ass is happy. Never looking back(I did a pun).

 

[Indacouch]

No fucking joke yo! I bought some off brand tp(I didn't know, first time buying tp) I returned it, bought charmin ultra soft!
My ass is happy. Never looking back(I did a pun).

I'm telling you ....any asshole around will appreciate better toilet paper ........there buttholes will feel better to ...

Pun pun

 

[Sir Napsalot]

Don't buy any newly-manufactured vacuum tubes- they all suck

 

[Elwood Diggler]

bidets heathens

 

[buzzardbreath]

Don't buy any newly-manufactured vacuum tubes- they all suck

quite astute but too literal, still get my thumbs up

 

[Bob Zmuda]

If you can feel that last little dingleberry hanging in the void, by all means wait and let it drip naturally. (It could take several minutes but trust me)

If you try to wipe it; things will immediately go downhill. That little dingleberry could turn a 1-wiper into a 14-wiper/half roll of tp.

 

[buzzardbreath]

If you can feel that last little dingleberry hanging in the void, by all means wait and let it drip naturally. (It could take several minutes but trust me)

If you try to wipe it; things will immediately go downhill. That little dingleberry could turn a 1-wiper into a 14-wiper/half roll of tp.

LMAO, Sound advice indeed!

 

[buzzardbreath]

It's only logical to move over to the shower.

If you have the urge to shave your anus, don't use your wife's leg razor.