Need Advice for New Business Venture

Discussion in 'Toke N Talk' started by ClaytonBigsby, Feb 7, 2018.


    ClaytonBigsby Well-Known Member

    This last year has been crazy for me. I’ve been deported twice and had to leave a country just when I was getting my shit dialed in. I’m back in the States and I need some scratch, like Meta; @Metasynth, you can use this if you want to, but nobody else! I want to run it past you guys because I don’t have much and don’t want to make the investment if you think it won;t work.

    You are my only family and I trust your judgment. So here it is, I am thinking about starting a home colonoscopy service on Craigslist. I was at the home depot in the plumbing section looking for parts to make a pocket pussy and got the idea when I saw this


    Of course I want to look official so I’ll also get some rubber gloves, you know the ones, that go all the way up your arm, but my budget is tight so I might look into those really long vinyl sleeves they use to stick their arm up a cows ass. Goggles are a must. I can get those at the dollar store. What kind of brush should I use? The brass ones are probably too much, but I bet they would work like a MF. Probably like a round nylon? I’ll use a snake to do most of the cleaning and will probably put some cotton cloth in the end like when you clean a gun barrel. How much would you guys pay for such a service? Thanks in advance.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    this set up is pretty bad ass, when I start making money




    Karah, dangledo, MarWan and 21 others like this.

    curious2garden Well-Known Member

    My friend this could get dangerous. The Proctologist's Union are all about protecting their turf. How much you willing to split with them or you think you're able to take their turf?

    charface Well-Known Member

    I have a pair of those gloves left over from some cleanup. Consider them as your own, they aren't very new but if you bleach their assholes I doubt they will get too sick to pay their bill.

    cannabineer Ursus marijanus

    She's right you know. Those guys are serious assholes who are serious about assholes. Unless you make a stiff investment up front in a come-from-behind strategy, the horizons getting widened might be yours Clayton, gnome Saiyan.

    Metasynth Well-Known Member

    Sounds like a pretty shitty idea...

    ...SIGN ME UP!

    Singlemalt Well-Known Member

    Oh yes;


    ClaytonBigsby Well-Known Member

    Saaaay wuuut?!?!?!? Seriously, a union of asshole cleaners? I'l be low key; probably test drive someone's car on CL to each job so if shit gets real I can take off, leave the car if I have to. How much do they make? I will start out at half, not half ass, just half.

    CHARFACE! WTF? How are you!?!? I had to break my phone and lost your number. You still within walkie talkie range?

    Singlemalt Well-Known Member

    I'll offer my services as Professional Relations to deal with the competition

    charface Well-Known Member

    I been thinking about you lately.
    Ill pm my number, lets hook up soon

    ClaytonBigsby Well-Known Member

    Was I big?

    ClaytonBigsby Well-Known Member

    Gotta go, gotta go. I'll take your answers off the air. I love and miss you Mfers!

    neosapien Well-Known Member

    It sounds like a pretty good idea but you should probably hire a lawyer to write you up a contract. You don't want some pussy trying to sue you just cuz you left a ring up there or accidentally gave them a collapsed asshole.

    lokie Well-Known Member

    Hospitals get big $ for those services.

    I bet you could get at least 5 easy payments of $19.95.

    I bet you could charge a toxic waste fee too if you take everything you remove
    away with you.:p

    Just watch out for the old farts, they tend to be cheap and will expect you to performe
    services at a reduced rate.;)

    ClaytonBigsby Well-Known Member

    I don't have money for a lawyer, besides I HATE those lying cheating fucks. You can collapse an asshole? Back when I was a bouncer, for some reason we always made a to do for one of the guys every year on his birthday. One year I stopped off at Mr. Kim's video store and rented a couple movies for the party. One was crack whores of america and the other something like analrama 16. This woman had a GD two liter coke up her ass. I mean, how do you keep your shit in after something like that?

    Toxic waste? I hadn;t even considered it. I don;t know much about it but I figure anyone who calls me out doesn't either, so easy money really.

    I think I saw a show once where they made the person lay on their side for easier assess. What do you guys know about it?
    Karah, whitebb2727, neosapien and 5 others like this.

    ClaytonBigsby Well-Known Member

    Also, SWIM needs a burner phone. Do they still make them, where do I get one, and how do they work? Can you text on them?

    charface Well-Known Member

    Speaking of bleaching assholes
    Up sell that shit along with waxing.
    I mean really milk the shit out of these

    BarnBuster Virtually Unknown Member

    This is cool AF!! Need a partner? I've got some shit(!) I need to try out. We could give out "Gallon Club" awards and everything

    a senile fungus

    a senile fungus Well-Known Member

    Hear me out I'm just throwing this out there, but I think I can save you 50% on gloves. If you use one hand (short glove) to grab em in the pussy, then the other can have the longer glove to do the dirty.

    Regarding lawyer services, @Finshaggy has never been known to be a lying, cheating fuck. In fact, I'd be surprised if @Finshaggy didn't offer his services Pro Bono because of the stand up law offices of @Finshaggy . Either that or I might know someone who specializes in bird law.

    ANC Well-Known Member

    Loved the ribbed tube, will recommend.

    lokie Well-Known Member

    I have given this some thought and think you may be able to increase revenue
    by offering different levels of service options.

    Tear 3 - No lube for the hard core and/or the cheap basterds. Low bills.
    Teer 2 - Dry lube for those that want added comfort. Some frills.
    Tier 1 - Intense Pleasure Gel Lubricant. All of the thrills.

    Add any of the following to any offered service for an extra fee.
    Rose petals - visually soothing and adds to the aroma of the settings.
    Restraints - extra safety precautions or for the BDSM enthusiast.
    Happy Ending - calms all of the surrounding tissues after such a brown eye opening experience.

    Of course there is always 1 turd in the bunch.
    For the absolute cheap bastard that still wants something for next to nothing
    you could rent them the gear and they can shove it up their own ass!

    And if they are too cheap to pay the toxic waste fee just leave everything as is and they can clean it up themself.
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2018

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