Ladies, have you ever felt like you might be in a potentially dangerous situation?

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Padawanbater2

Padawanbater2

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Specifically regarding sexual situations, for example, have you ever been in a situation where you felt like you either couldn't say no directly, or if you did, it wouldn't make a difference? Have you ever felt scared in a situation with someone you previously trusted?

I've been reading a bit about statistics of sexual assault and was curious about any real life, first hand accounts.

Interestingly enough, female sexual assault victims make up somewhere around 70% of cases in the US, but males are still the majority because of the sexual assaults that take place in prison.
 
ClaytonBigsby

ClaytonBigsby

Well-Known Member
Padawanbater2 said:
Specifically regarding sexual situations, for example, have you ever been in a situation where you felt like you either couldn't say no directly, or if you did, it wouldn't make a difference? Have you ever felt scared in a situation with someone you previously trusted?

I've been reading a bit about statistics of sexual assault and was curious about any real life, first hand accounts.

Interestingly enough, female sexual assault victims make up somewhere around 70% of cases in the US, but males are still the majority because of the sexual assaults that take place in prison.
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slowbus

slowbus

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this one time at band camp in India
[h=2]Surprise Winner At This Years Punjab Rape Festival[/h]May 7, 2013 by Jimmy Rustling 7 Comments
Winners of this year’s Punjab Rape Festival. Nikhil Thakur (second from left) being awarded ‘The Baalkrishan’ for most rapes.
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Punjab, INDIA — Exciting news is coming out of Punjab, India this morning as this year’s Punjab Rape Festival results have been announced and prizes are being awarded. It was close, but in the end it was Nikhil Thakur who took home the ‘The Baalkrishan’ for most rapes this year. This was the first time Thakur had participated in the event and locals are still in shock.
Madhuban Ahluwalia who heads up the annual festival told reporters he is just baffled by this year’s winner. “We don’t know where Nikhil Thakur came from or who he is,” said Ahluwalia. “There are men in India who have participated in this festival since they were little boys, and then some guy just comes in here and wins it all by getting the most rapes.” Ahluwalia continued, “Well I can tell you that the locals around town are not too pleased.”
“It’s f*ckin’ bullsh*t, that’s what it is,” said 81-year-old Madhusmita Borthakur. “I’ve been participating in this festival since I was nine years old. And some new dude, some hip-hopper, just comes in and gets the most rapes. It’s not g*ddamn fair and I demand a recount!”
Ahluwalia told reporters why the event is so important. “This is a long time tradition in Punjab dating back thousands of years,” says Ahluwalia. “We rape the evil demons out of the girls, otherwise they will cheat on us and we will be forced to kill them. So it is win-win for everyone.” Ahluwalia continued, “The Punjab Rape Festival began in 43 BC when Baalkrishan Tamil Nadu raped everyone in his village of Ludhiana. Baalkrishan Tamil Nadu is remembered every year at this event, in fact the trophy given to the man with the most rapes is called ‘The Baalkrishan’.”
23-year-old Harikrishna Majumdar who tied for 3rd told reporters that he had been training all year for this event. “I told everyone that I would get the most rapes this year and I almost did!” Majumdar said, “I was practicing raping my sister and her friends every day and my hard work paid off!” Majumdar continued, “One day I will get the Baalkrishan prize for sure!”
[h=2]WINNERS OF THIS YEAR PUNJAB RAPE FESTIVAL[/h]1. Nikhil Thakur – 28 confirmed rapes
2. Suresh Ambiger – 24 confirmed rapes
3. Chandan Panjwani – 22 confirmed rapes
4. Harikrishna Majumdar – 22 confirmed rapes
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“We normally award just three winners, but Harikrishna Majumdar was able to sneak in there at the last minute and get rape number 22,” said Ahluwalia. “We are all so proud of him!”

34-year-old Paul Horner who is a Rape Crisis Specialist said the rape statistics in India are incorrect. “Currently India is second in reported rapes in the world only behind the United States. This information is false for a number of reasons,” says Horner. “In India, for a woman that has been raped to go to the police she usually needs four to five witnesses to collaborate her story. This act will also shame her and her family for life. In India the woman is blamed for the rape, not the man. Plus in a lot of cases the woman can be stoned to death or even forced to marry the man who raped her. In the United State of course that does not exist in our free society. Well excuse me, it may not be a free society, but when it comes to a woman being able to report a rape to the proper authorities, justice is always served,” Horner continued, “No one looks down on a rape victim in the United States. She is only greeted with open arms and the person responsible goes to prison.” Horner finished by explaining to reporters, “I imagine in India, realistically, only about 2% of all rapes actually get reported. It is so sad. I truly hope the Indian Government starts doing something about this pure evil and embarrassment to their country.”
For more information on the festival or if you would like to participate in next year’s event, please call the 24-hour Punjab Rape Festival hotline at (785) 273-0325.
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schuylaar

Well-Known Member
This is a sensitive subject..joking aside..no less than half a dozen times which involved kicking out a car window on one occasion and jumping from a moving car on another then having having that car look for me while I hid stuffed under somebody's porch for an hour with one man on foot..came so close I thought he would have heard my heart beating..
 
ruderalis88

ruderalis88

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Yeah this is a very sensitive subject. I've never actually been raped, but i have been sexually assaulted, and i have been sort of cornered into sex with guys for fear that if i say no it'll happen anyway. I'm a lesbian, and i don't actually enjoy having sex with guys, but there you go.
I've been in a LOT of situations where i've been afraid of what might be going to happen and have had to do things like say i'm going to the bathroom and sneak out/make up a boyfriend or brother who's coming to meet me/say i'm HIV positive (i'm not).

Separately, about 70% of my female friends have been either raped or sexually assaulted, and only about 15% of them have ever reported it. It's a serious problem. Especially in a culture (generalising western culture here, i'm Scottish) where rape is seen as a joke or "not that bad". If there's no consent, it's rape - end of.
All the victim blaming and rape apology stuff is just SO prevalent, just look at the Stuebenville (sp?) coverage. There was that girl in Halifax who was so bullied after being raped that she killed herself. And of course there are still all the jokes like "How do you piss off a feminist? Rape her." etc etc.
Anyone who says it's a woman's responsibility to avoid getting raped (eg don't dress like that, don't get drunk, don't kiss guys if you don't want to have sex with them, etc) is making the problem worse. The only solution is for guys to stop raping.

Possibly interestingly, most of my gay male friends have been raped but none of the straight ones. The problem in prisons is completely horrendous - i don't mean to detract from that or from the number of men who are victims (nor indeed the women who are rapists) but outside of prison, the onus really is on men raping women.

Interesting topic though, never thought i'd see a guy opening a thread like this on RIU!
 
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schuylaar

Well-Known Member
guy opening this thread obviously wants talk to women lol..in the real world, I don't know of a women who has NOT been in this situation on some level..guys, if you don't believe me just ask..good news though, we now have tasers.
 
hsfkush

hsfkush

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A guy I know stopped a woman being raped, he beat the living shit out of the guy who was left in a pool of his own blood. The guy who was attempting to rape the woman pressed charges against the guy who kicked the hell out of him, he served 3 years in prison and the rapist is still walking the streets, albeit with a gimp leg as his leg was broken in 8 places.

The guy who gave the beating should be hailed a hero, but was considered a criminal.
 
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schuylaar

Well-Known Member
hsfkush said:
A guy I know stopped a woman being raped, he beat the living shit out of the guy who was left in a pool of his own blood. The guy who was attempting to rape the woman pressed charges against the guy who kicked the hell out of him, he served 3 years in prison and the rapist is still walking the streets, albeit with a gimp leg as his leg was broken in 8 places.

The guy who gave the beating should be hailed a hero, but was considered a criminal.
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agreed, but there must be more to the story sorry to say..
 
dr.gonzo1

dr.gonzo1

Well-Known Member
ruderalis88 said:
Yeah this is a very sensitive subject. I've never actually been raped, but i have been sexually assaulted, and i have been sort of cornered into sex with guys for fear that if i say no it'll happen anyway. I'm a lesbian, and i don't actually enjoy having sex with guys, but there you go.
I've been in a LOT of situations where i've been afraid of what might be going to happen and have had to do things like say i'm going to the bathroom and sneak out/make up a boyfriend or brother who's coming to meet me/say i'm HIV positive (i'm not).

Separately, about 70% of my female friends have been either raped or sexually assaulted, and only about 15% of them have ever reported it. It's a serious problem. Especially in a culture (generalising western culture here, i'm Scottish) where rape is seen as a joke or "not that bad". If there's no consent, it's rape - end of.
All the victim blaming and rape apology stuff is just SO prevalent, just look at the Stuebenville (sp?) coverage. There was that girl in Halifax who was so bullied after being raped that she killed herself. And of course there are still all the jokes like "How do you piss off a feminist? Rape her." etc etc.
Anyone who says it's a woman's responsibility to avoid getting raped (eg don't dress like that, don't get drunk, don't kiss guys if you don't want to have sex with them, etc) is making the problem worse. The only solution is for guys to stop raping.

Possibly interestingly, most of my gay male friends have been raped but none of the straight ones. The problem in prisons is completely horrendous - i don't mean to detract from that or from the number of men who are victims (nor indeed the women who are rapists) but outside of prison, the onus really is on men raping women.

Interesting topic though, never thought i'd see a guy opening a thread like this on RIU!
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Hey rud, you paint a pretty bleak picture of life in Scotland. Rape being seen as "not that bad" & "a bit of a laugh" sounds terrible.

Im gay and scottish. What you have described (70% rape ratio) is thankfully not what my group of friends have experienced.

I hope you dont think Im being cunty, I believe and realise that everyones life is different. Just dont want people thinking Scotland is one big rape fest.

What I will say is that anyone who could inflict the physical and emotianal pain of forcibly having sex with another human......no longer deserves to be defined as one.
 
ruderalis88

ruderalis88

Well-Known Member
No worries, don't think you're being cunty at all! I probably should have put my point better - i don't think Scotland is worse than anywhere else for rape problems, i think all of the english-speaking West (UK, USA, Canada etc) has a terrible problem with rape culture. Only mentione my Scottishness as a "I'm from this part of that larger group" type thing.
Can i ask if you're male or female? 70% ratio was for sexual assault as well, that includes things like having your tits or arse grabbed or having your hand shoved down someones pants etc etc.
Scotland is no worse than the rest of the UK - but it's still pretty bad!
 
dr.gonzo1

dr.gonzo1

Well-Known Member
ruderalis88 said:
No worries, don't think you're being cunty at all! I probably should have put my point better - i don't think Scotland is worse than anywhere else for rape problems, i think all of the english-speaking West (UK, USA, Canada etc) has a terrible problem with rape culture. Only mentione my Scottishness as a "I'm from this part of that larger group" type thing.
Can i ask if you're male or female? 70% ratio was for sexual assault as well, that includes things like having your tits or arse grabbed or having your hand shoved down someones pants etc etc.
Scotland is no worse than the rest of the UK - but it's still pretty bad!
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I'm male and when you put it like that, I've been sexually assualted lots of times :o
 
ruderalis88

ruderalis88

Well-Known Member
Not sure what the IT crowd gif is meant to mean..


Gonzo the fact that you wouldn't normally perceive those acts as sexual assault is indicative of the problem i'm talking about!
 
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