How to survive prison?

Puffster

Well-Known Member
Keep your fucking mouth shut...dont be tellin everybody your business....keep quiet listen and they will tell you everything...they all have their own agendas so if you keep quiet you can learn them before they learn you
one of, if not the most intelligent things ever written on riu!!!!!:peace:
 

bgmike8

Well-Known Member
Lol. Owned.

people who say owned are so queer.



so i guess blacks dont exist then? there is no difference then?

you can say that we all came from the same place but it is obvious that whites evolved much more. and this is the race that i speak of.
 

purpdaddy

Well-Known Member
I've done ALOT of time. Mostly for guns, drugs and counterfiet, anyways, the way to survive in jail, is to just fucking act right, follow the range rules, and don't try to be a hard ass, just play your cards, read and talk with the boys, everyone hates being in there, so no one needs extra stress from some punk trying to be hard, especialy when you just had a bad day in court, that'll just make you wanna rag doll the little bitch. Deffinatly get on a work crew, takes your mind off shit and not just being bored in the same range day after day, and plus you make $ for canteen. Kitchen is the best to get, alot of shit comes through the kitchen and laundry, I always get the laundry cause (well.....too many assults, and weapon charges) so my classifacation won't allow them to let me work in the kitchen, if you don't have them, then you can go, plus you can get extra food, and if you got a good crew, you can make a brew.
Anyway, just act right, because it really is a community, you LIVE with these ppl, and sometimes, you live with this ppl for years. So you prolly would rather make friends than enemys. You'd be surprised on what kind of cool ppl you can meet in the can.
Jail is nothing like what you see on tv. I heard it was rougher in the U.S. thoungh, I'm from Canada.
Anyway, that's my little bit on this subject,

happy growing
If you chillin with the "BOYS" in LA prisons you punk.BOYS=PUNKS..Yea jail aint shit..go to PRISON..They got Booty bandits in canada..well lemme tell ya this..They got bitches in there that call themselves that and thats all they do..try to talk you out your ass and i seen happen to SO many freshfish whiteboys a couple blacks...
One of my close padnas got locked up..man on the streets he was a fucking fool would pull that 44 on you quick and would burn you to a crisp if you didnt give it up...His first day in there.As im leaving for work detail..i see him struggling with his mattress and shit..lil bitty dude..but was psycho i still dont understand..well i go help him to his rack and shit..try to give him the basic game before i leave,,Then i hear "WORK CALL" fuck i gotta go "just dont talk to anyone"Seriously...he didnt take heed to what i had told him...i got back from work...the bandits shaved his head and eyebrown and put him in sum red cut-offs ...When igot back to the dorm and saw that...It really fucked me up..So he was already sittin on the dudes bed thats a no no..i went over there and said hes for me..yanked him off the bed and made him sit in his bunk..went to the tv unplugged it..MAde a fuckin announcement that anyone fuck wth my bitch gonaa get they issue..That saved him..I told him to just go sneek SOMEONE anyone to get yourself in the hole and tell the warden you need to be in honors dorm..He shook back from it but i still think they got his booty..Jujst goes to show you..Prison a whole different world and yes it like it is on TV..Those are real prisons with real victs..Trust me its real.
 

bgmike8

Well-Known Member
my favorite show was funniest videos. it takes your mind away and lets you laugh a bit. also simpsons family guy
 

Daguzenn

Member
don't ever let a cop into your house. if the cop is legally allowed in, he won't be asking.
cops lie, lie and when you think they are done lying - they lie some more.

myth: a cop is not allowed to use drugs - well it is true but they are very good at faking it.
True: a cop is not allowed to allow drugs to get back on the street. they buy, buy, and buy - but never sell (unless it is a sting). so if you suspect someone of being a cop - have them give you a joint and walk away (be prepared to eat it).
A cop can do whatever the fuck he wants. He can walk right in, if he has ANY suspicion of illegal activity...so, yeah.
Same with searching car, pulling you over...etc.
 

shroomer33

Active Member
A cop can do whatever the fuck he wants, whether it is Constitutional or not. Cops aren't trained in the Constitution like they used to be. Your job is to keep your fucking mouth shut and beat the case in court. Just pray that the judge has some respect for the Bill of Rights, which he probably won't.

And NEVER let them in your house!!! EVER! Talk through the deadbolted door. Tell them to bust the door down if they have a warrant. If they don't have a warrant, tell their dispatcher to call you on your cell phone. NEVER let them in!!!!!!
If they could get a warrant, they wouldn't be talking to you through the door. They would have already bust the door down and you would have 50 guns pointed at your pot smoking head.
 

Louis541

Well-Known Member
A cop can legally search your car if he has probable cause. Your house is a different story, because of castle law. They absolutely have to have a warrant or your permission, which they WILL try to bully you into giving them permission. Just keep in mind that if they are asking it more then likely means they don't have permission.
 

purpdaddy

Well-Known Member
A cop can legally search your car if he has probable cause. Your house is a different story, because of castle law. They absolutely have to have a warrant or your permission, which they WILL try to bully you into giving them permission. Just keep in mind that if they are asking it more then likely means they don't have permission.
That needed to be said... THANK YOU
if you dont know your shit now days when you run into the law...they gonna run clean over you..people please know state laws..A cop just cant do whatever the fuck he wants.They can lie to you to get the truth.So thats why its so important to know the COPS statutes and limitations as well as your own.
 

Imlovinit

Well-Known Member
Seriously, what's going to stop the police from walking right into your house finding your plants and just saying he smelt the pot from the door. It's your word against theirs. Personally, i wouldn't even answer the door. Fuck em! If they want in they can knock my door down. I just hope i can destroy enough evidence to make it probation or community service. You don't have to talk to the cops, just your lawyer!
 

Pushit

Member
pretty new and stubble upon this thread. I just recently got busted in May(twice actually long story)...Apparently they had a task force with help from the FBI.(Questioned for 3 hours in the back of a police car by 2 feds. Didnt say shit so they sat my ass in the back of the patrol car with the windows rolled up in 100 degree weather) I'm out on bail right now still waiting for trial, they keep resetting it. My lawyer says the DA has not even charged me "Yet". The way they busted me was full of shit...Did not give a shit about my rights nor respected them. Nothing I can do at the time but hopefully my lawyers will try and suppress the evidence because they had no probable cause in the first place. I'm facing 2 years if I get convicted
 

newb19547

Well-Known Member
pretty new and stubble upon this thread. I just recently got busted in May(twice actually long story)...Apparently they had a task force with help from the FBI.(Questioned for 3 hours in the back of a police car by 2 feds. Didnt say shit so they sat my ass in the back of the patrol car with the windows rolled up in 100 degree weather) I'm out on bail right now still waiting for trial, they keep resetting it. My lawyer says the DA has not even charged me "Yet". The way they busted me was full of shit...Did not give a shit about my rights nor respected them. Nothing I can do at the time but hopefully my lawyers will try and suppress the evidence because they had no probable cause in the first place. I'm facing 2 years if I get convicted
Shit man! Good Luck to you :peace:
 

blakkmask

Well-Known Member
1. If you socialize with anyone, make sure they are your same skin color. PERIOD.

2. One of the easiest shanks or shivs to make is to melt the grip end of your plastic, prison issued toothbrush and shape it into a point. With a little sly hand work, you can carry it around in plain view and know one notice its a weapon.

3. The first person that tries to punk you, no matter how big he is, FIGHT HIM. More than Likely It will be broken up before you sustain serious injury and the altercation is more over dominance not because that other guy dislike you. Show no fear.

4. Phones books under your clothes makes great armor against poorly made prison weapons. Try to pad it and tuck the edges into your pants to make it look natural. you dont really want anyone to notice it, this would make just wanna go for your eyes or neck.

5. If you run with a crew, try to never go anywhere alone. Prison bonds are strong, and your homies know the consequences for betrayal.....

6. Never apologize for shit " Im sorry" doesent exist in prison

7. Find a Hobby like reading, drawing, and puzzles to keep busy.

8. Drugs are availible in prison but are ALOT more expensive than on the streets. drugs in prison usually sell for 5x more than street value.

9.Try to smugle things like orange and apple juice back to your cell. Add a few rolled up balls of bread for yeast...Ferment...and you can make some O.K. booze. Add fruit coctail for extra flavor.

10. DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO SURVIVE. KILL, STEAL,LIE, SUCK, FUCK, SELL, PRAY, RAPE, TORURE, WHATEVER IT TAKES.
 

olishell

Active Member
Bend over and take it like a punk......Or(my preference)beat the shit out of the first guy that looks at you sideways.
 

shroomer33

Active Member
pretty new and stubble upon this thread. I just recently got busted in May(twice actually long story)...Apparently they had a task force with help from the FBI.(Questioned for 3 hours in the back of a police car by 2 feds. Didnt say shit so they sat my ass in the back of the patrol car with the windows rolled up in 100 degree weather) I'm out on bail right now still waiting for trial, they keep resetting it. My lawyer says the DA has not even charged me "Yet". The way they busted me was full of shit...Did not give a shit about my rights nor respected them. Nothing I can do at the time but hopefully my lawyers will try and suppress the evidence because they had no probable cause in the first place. I'm facing 2 years if I get convicted
Damned good thing you kept your mouth shut.
You should file a civil suit against the pigs who put you in a hot car. It is against the law to do that to a dog. They are treating you worse than a dog. SUE THEM!!

Even if they beat the charge, they can't beat the ride of going to court and paying for a lawyer.
 

spazstic

Well-Known Member
It's all about your race. stick with your own and if you see one of your own race getting jumped you had better jump in there right away. Or next time it's you getting jumped you ain't gonna have any help and you're gonna get your ass beat.
 

email

Member
I've read every single page in this topic.

I've never been or have been to jail/prison. But this advice seems to be the most logical i've read.

1.) Walk with your head up... don't stare at the ground.

2.) like above: don't act like a victim or you will be a victim. You will be sized up from the moment you get there and they WILL have an idea why you are in there.

3.) If attacked fight back with everything you have (even if you lose) or else you will look like a coward and that'll just be inviting more trouble your way.

4.) Don't talk about your problems and don't talk about other peoples problems.

5.) Do not trust ANYBODY

6.) never accept anything from anybody. never take anything you find on your bed... just brush it off on to the floor.

7.) Do not gamble. Do not take anything on loan. do not ask for favors.

8.) cigarettes are king.



These sound like bad advice:

1.) when you get in, go up to the biggest baddest mofo you see and beat him up.

2.) do anything in order to survive


We are trying to reduce time in there w/o STD's right?


Anyway, I've never been and am not trying to pretend I know what I'm talking about. Somethings you are just going to have to learn when you get in there. Oh and for that kung fu guy that did that post like he was steven seagal... one guy you could probably win. With two, you probably would not. With three, you would not. Just remember this quote "Everybody thinks they can fight, Then they get hit with the truth" I forget where I heard that. maybe mike tyson.

Oh and just a thought. I've read in this topic that jail/prison was like candyland to it is hell. It's useful when you guys say what country you were in and if in the US, what state.

soooo... if any of you jail vets have anything to add or if some of my assumptions are just plain wrong. please feel free to correct me.
 

blakkmask

Well-Known Member
These sound like bad advice:

1.) when you get in, go up to the biggest baddest mofo you see and beat him up.

2.) do anything in order to survive


We are trying to reduce time in there w/o STD's right?
So you would rather die than catch herpes? You'er committed
 
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