couch weed problems?

I sit on my couch.. A lot..
I figured I smoke enough to grow..
I put the leg of my couch into some good organic soil.
How long before my couch grows bud?

Do I need more nutrients than Taco Bell?
I'm using cheesey gordita crunch right now.

What recipe do I need to have the best 10$ or less nutrient meal any couch grower can have?

Example: French bread, salami, cheddar cheese, strawberry jelly... Toasted..

All you need now is a way to water the couch.
Seems like it's full of gaseous nutes to last a few grows.
Legumes are your friend.

I never move from the couch. It gets watered daily. You just made me realize I am the bud that spring forth from this kushion!!! Som bitch!

Spit ding!

Nutes and Nugs said:

All you need now is a way to water the couch.
Seems like it's full of gaseous nutes to last a few grows.
Legumes are your friend.

Click to expand...

Add a 10 min or less quick meal if you'd like...
Example.. Smooores pop tarts with butter spread on top.. Microwave for 15 seconds

OMG so fuc8ing funny love it can't wait for my greens to mature maybe I will come up with something only time wil tell. Keep up the funnies

Your couch grows Schwag!

Hookabelly said:

http://www.wftv.com/news/news/480-pound-woman-dies-after-six-years-on-couch/nFCfB/

Click to expand...

saving on fertilizer allready...

good light for growing couch

You need to add stimulation. I suggest a strict xbox or playstation saturation every couple of hours switching between a high quality porn and stem stretching at least once a day, but no more than 4 times daily.

You're not going to grow good sticky buds until you quit your fucking job, bro.

Quit your stupid job, stop bathing, don't wash your clothes or your asshole, either.

All that is good, but if I can give any advice, it's to quit your job and move back in to your parents' house.

Then you will finally see crazy growth, bro. And the nugs will be dense as fuck.

If your really couch growing don't forget the nuts!!

Yes mate yes!

I once did a grow just like yours because a friend told me old stale farts in growing medium make anything the shit!
I hope your couch is well farted on just like any good couch should!

Set it outside to get the full potential. I know a lot of people are growing em inside, cause that's where the AC is. Don't take the lazy approach. Do it like it was meant to be done!! Besides those couches have been growing outdoors for thousands of years without any help from us. Here's one in its natural habitat....

Ohh you didnt hear about those couches made out of rockwool????