Beardo

Here I am, just been trying to find myself,
hanging out around the lost and found, hoping someone will try to pick me up
[youtube]gcEUWR0JqYY[/youtube]
 
The holidays get me all messed up, this year was... worse.
Hope this ain't the case for you beardo.
 
dirtsurfr said:
The holidays get me all messed up, this year was... worse.
Hope this ain't the case for you beardo.
Click to expand...

Yeah Christmas is tough, holidays are always kind of lonely when your not with friends or family, Christmas is always kind of rough I had a good friend die a couple days before christmas years ago and I always kind of think about that and how it easily could have been me because we were doing the same wild reckless stuff just worked out that i'm here today and he's not, he was young at the time and had family so I always think about how tough it must have been for his family.
I also have a rough time because being alone gets lonely but I stay alone because I have learned through experience that most people suck and cause you problems and I get weird paranoia that makes it hard to talk to people or go to public places or events, I think my brain got fucked up from shooting coke or doing speed or acid- I recognize it for what it is so for the most part I can cope but it's not always easy, I've been clean for years but I think i'm still feeling the effects of years of heavy use and abuse
Thanks to all of you for asking how i'm doing.
 
Keep on keepin' on Beardo.

[video=youtube;RcYVKrBatj8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcYVKrBatj8[/video]
 
i was missing you. im happy to see you around these parts. i am sorry your xmas was lonely. holidays are always kind of lonely for me but since i am not religious, i try to remind myself that it's all a marketing ploy to get people to spend money and i feel less bad about being alone lol
 
i don't believe in sin and i have a BF but we don't celebrate. 2 doesn't equal festive lol, its just the 2 of us on the couch like any other day.
 
beardo said:
Yeah Christmas is tough, holidays are always kind of lonely when your not with friends or family, Christmas is always kind of rough I had a good friend die a couple days before christmas years ago and I always kind of think about that and how it easily could have been me because we were doing the same wild reckless stuff just worked out that i'm here today and he's not, he was young at the time and had family so I always think about how tough it must have been for his family.
I also have a rough time because being alone gets lonely but I stay alone because I have learned through experience that most people suck and cause you problems and I get weird paranoia that makes it hard to talk to people or go to public places or events, I think my brain got fucked up from shooting coke or doing speed or acid- I recognize it for what it is so for the most part I can cope but it's not always easy, I've been clean for years but I think i'm still feeling the effects of years of heavy use and abuse
Thanks to all of you for asking how i'm doing.
Click to expand...

sorry to hear that man i got your back if you were ever near me or i knew you
 
First this thread made me happy because someone cared, now it makes me sad because no one cares
 
we care, i thought maybe you were hanging out with Urca since i haven't "seen" her around lately either. or maybe she is one of the "new" names being used by "old" people????
 
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