Great Stoner Quotes

kho20

kho20

Well-Known Member
me and a couple buddies jus chillin one day and my friend josh ends it like this
"man i'm cooked, dude im blazed, i'm i'm ...... fuck i forgot"

same kid

" hey dude lets go um um um ....." i say "smoke" he says " smoke"

i think hes a victim of the good ole short term memory loss or i like to call it brain shits
 
sollidamra

sollidamra

Member
Johnny Retro said:
Me and my buddys are talking about a movie and someone gave away the ending. (btw were all baked of course)
So i was like, common man..now i dont wanna see the movie, you ruined it
And my other buddy, "wait stop thinking about it...youll probly forget"
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LMAO - AWESOME MAN..
I was with a group of friends at uni well baked and lost the draw for the late night trip to the 24hr garage. My friend Dan decided to come with me. When he was at the counter buying cigs i was checkin out the cake and biscuits for my cravings when i spotted something that looked like a swiss roll but written on the front in big letters was "DAN CAKE".
Not particularly funny now but at the time it took 5 mins of me rolling on the floor in fits of laughter before the guy behind the counter threw me out.
 
F

felloffscooterstoned

Member
i remember a time we were smoking cracking weed i looked out of the window and tured to my buddy daz and said it was windy outside he said no it's thursday then my other mate said so am i letts go to the pub i could'nt stop laughing for ages has anyone ever miss heard things when stoned another time we were at a friends house completly mangled mate was laying on bed when my other friend asked him if he wanted a pillow he tured round and said yes i want a polo
 
BigBudBalls

BigBudBalls

Well-Known Member
Not a quote, but on on boy scout camping trip we all were walking on a set of railroad tracks blazing away. We heard a train coming, we all panicked and ran in all directions. All we _had_ to do was take 2 steps to the side.

(yeah, we had a ultra cool troupe and troupe leader)
 
jfgordon1

jfgordon1

Well-Known Member
BigBudBalls said:
Not a quote, but on on boy scout camping trip we all were walking on a set of railroad tracks blazing away. We heard a train coming, we all panicked and ran in all directions. All we _had_ to do was take 2 steps to the side.

(yeah, we had a ultra cool troupe and troupe leader)
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haha it's amazing how toking makes you over think things sometimes
 
kho20

kho20

Well-Known Member
BigBudBalls said:
Not a quote, but on on boy scout camping trip we all were walking on a set of railroad tracks blazing away. We heard a train coming, we all panicked and ran in all directions. All we _had_ to do was take 2 steps to the side.

(yeah, we had a ultra cool troupe and troupe leader)
Click to expand...
hahahaha this reminds me of one time we smoked while we were takin shrooms (gotta do it before they set in or youll be freaked out haha) but we were walkin around downtown and a damn cab came behind us ( we were walkin in the middle of the road) and he started honking and flashing his lights lol we all ran like full speed off and my buddy yellin holy shit a dinosaur lmao ity took like forever to find his ass lol
 
G

gypsyum

Member
So a bunch of us were sitting around smoking and one of my buddies say "Try to blow the smoke out of your ears. I Know it's impossible but it gets you hella high."
Of course we all tried haha
 
ihatebud

ihatebud

Member
One time my cousin and I were smoking, and I was telling him how I blaze at work all the time and this was said :

Cousin: "Dude you're such a pot head. You're probably lazy as hell at work"

Me: "Bitch, I will build an ark high as fuuuuuck. I will make Noah's Ark look like the Forrest Gump shrimping boat"

we were laughing hysterically for 15 minutes lol

and no, neither of us are religious lol just random THC induced convo
 
Scuba

Scuba

Well-Known Member
i grow everglades bud said:
ok guys i never really had one untill now and i found it tonight and it is now my sig.
i couldnt believe the dude really did this!!
but its funny lmao well to me is is!
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OMFG that is retarded dumb. hahahahahahhahahahaha like all condom are latex. WTF does he use, a milkyway wrapper?
 
P

PadawanBater

Guest
kho20 said:
hahahaha this reminds me of one time we smoked while we were takin shrooms (gotta do it before they set in or youll be freaked out haha) but we were walkin around downtown and a damn cab came behind us ( we were walkin in the middle of the road) and he started honking and flashing his lights lol we all ran like full speed off and my buddy yellin holy shit a dinosaur lmao ity took like forever to find his ass lol
Click to expand...

Goddamn I couldn't stop laughing at that shit! Good stuff man!
 
Dan Halen

Dan Halen

Active Member
My personal all time best comes from my first time smoking weed. My friend got some cheap weed. Well we start smoking it and it and I wasn't getting as high as I thought I should. So I said, how did he know this wasn't bunk. H e said he had been getting his weed from this guy for for as long as he'd be smoking, about 3 weeks. I then asked how would he know if he was smoking bunk. He said he just would.

I then go on to say if he had never smoked the real thing he'd never know what it was like. Kinda like a placebo. Or like in The Matrix where the one guy talks about chicken and what it tastes like.

The epic stoned quote "Dude, what does chicken taste like?"

And another is the high test my friends and I came up with. Get your friend's attention and say "ham and cheese sandwich" slower than normal. If you both don't bust up laughing, you aren't high.
 
Bluntman and Chronic Boy

Bluntman and Chronic Boy

Member
Heres a great stoner story

I have a Bukket a (Waterless Gravity Bong) me and my friend karl were taking hits, 1hit=1 bowl when i wasnt looking he packed the bowl full of cigar tobacco, i took the full Gravity Bong hit of cigar tobacco started coughing my brains out while karl is siting there laughing at me, then i say "DAMM MUST OF BEEN A LOT STEAMS IN THAT BITCH" not knowing that it was cigar tobacco

The Bukket
 
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