jokes

Had a real shitastic day. Tell me all your shitty, dry ass jokes.

My goal is to have a humerus thread about jokes. Story jokes, funny sayings or one liners. No copy and paste, pictures, gifs or memes. So this guy's speeding and goes by an overpass, next thing he knows a cop is pulling him over. Cop walks up to the car and asked "why are you in such a hurry"...