Shit i gotta hit the bong

d.s.m. said:

I pretty much try to keep defecation separate from all other areas of my life.

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WusSupHoez420 said:

yea sumtimes ill have to take a shit and ill hold it so i can pack the bowl,

then take a hit, take a shit, then finish my bowl

lol its relaxing and a good way to start off the day LOL your corrrect

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woobystein said:

Update: If you read my post from yesterday then you know that my first attempt at pooping whilst smoking went totally haywire, most likely due to lack of fiber (hence the watery feces) and accidentally taking a hit that was to large for this particular scenario (resulting in a simultaneous coughing fit/diahrea esque splatter on my porcelin). But alas, i have vowed to try again as quitters never win and winners never quit and what good is a man if he is not a man of his word. I'm very pleased to report to you all that attempt #2 was a dazzling success. It began as i awoke early this morning, determined to spawn a large, hearty poop. The kind of poop that requires time and patience. After waking I devoured two english muffins, a bowl of cereal with added fruit and almonds, 2 poptarts, a pillsbury toaster stroodle, and a nice beef tamale. I was completely full and i was eager to believe that a massive brown stinky dump was on its way to conception. It should be mentioned that in between breakfast and lunch i had a slight bout with gas but my sphincter did not give in as i was committed to let the fecal beast grow until it would be born later in the afternoon. Also, it should be mentioned that i did not smoke at all until the event as i wanted to maximize the ambiance of the smoking/birthing process. As for lunch, a chipotle burritto was eaten with haste along with chips and guacomole. Yes, guacomole. Now it was time for the waiting game. And the wait was unbearable but not too long in retrospect. Roughly two and a half hours later i could hold in my wretched conglomerate of brown matter no longer and it was go time. do or die. This was it. I had a bowl of some freshly ground Green Crack with kief on it filled to the brim waiting anxiously for me next to the toilet. I plopped down and felt as if the whole world was watching me, even though i was home alone... The feeling might be described as sitting on the 50 yard line of a football stadium perched on a toilet with no one in the stands. As i sparked the bowl, i squeezed with trememdous effort. Actually, i began excreting a few seconds before i started inhaling so the shitting and smoking experience could peak simultaneously in elegance. And let me tell you this is exactly what happened. To those of you who have yet to try this manuever....do so. and do so with pride! for it is an experience not soon to be forgotten.

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woobystein said:

Update: If you read my post from yesterday then you know that my first attempt at pooping whilst smoking went totally haywire, most likely due to lack of fiber (hence the watery feces) and accidentally taking a hit that was to large for this particular scenario (resulting in a simultaneous coughing fit/diahrea esque splatter on my porcelin). But alas, i have vowed to try again as quitters never win and winners never quit and what good is a man if he is not a man of his word. I'm very pleased to report to you all that attempt #2 was a dazzling success. It began as i awoke early this morning, determined to spawn a large, hearty poop. The kind of poop that requires time and patience. After waking I devoured two english muffins, a bowl of cereal with added fruit and almonds, 2 poptarts, a pillsbury toaster stroodle, and a nice beef tamale. I was completely full and i was eager to believe that a massive brown stinky dump was on its way to conception. It should be mentioned that in between breakfast and lunch i had a slight bout with gas but my sphincter did not give in as i was committed to let the fecal beast grow until it would be born later in the afternoon. Also, it should be mentioned that i did not smoke at all until the event as i wanted to maximize the ambiance of the smoking/birthing process. As for lunch, a chipotle burritto was eaten with haste along with chips and guacomole. Yes, guacomole. Now it was time for the waiting game. And the wait was unbearable but not too long in retrospect. Roughly two and a half hours later i could hold in my wretched conglomerate of brown matter no longer and it was go time. do or die. This was it. I had a bowl of some freshly ground Green Crack with kief on it filled to the brim waiting anxiously for me next to the toilet. I plopped down and felt as if the whole world was watching me, even though i was home alone... The feeling might be described as sitting on the 50 yard line of a football stadium perched on a toilet with no one in the stands. As i sparked the bowl, i squeezed with trememdous effort. Actually, i began excreting a few seconds before i started inhaling so the shitting and smoking experience could peak simultaneously in elegance. And let me tell you this is exactly what happened. To those of you who have yet to try this manuever....do so. and do so with pride! for it is an experience not soon to be forgotten.

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Stoney McFried said:

OMG, thanks for the laugh. Rep to you. Only bad thing is, when I'm stoned, there's a time distortion, so wiping seems to take forever.I prefer a poopless smoke.

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