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How to Pass a Urine Test?

Discussion in 'Toke N Talk' started by Crayola, Feb 7, 2008.

  1.  
    Crayola

    Crayola Well-Known Member

    Okay, i need to pass a drug test, and the "problem" is that i smoke weed, every single day. I actually have to pass this thing tomorrow, too. So I was hoping that you guys could help me out with a simple solution.

    I need between 45-60 mL of urine, and it needs to be between 90-100 degrees Fahrenheit. I know this because i went there today with like 10 mL of my friend's clean piss, and the nurse just poured it out saying it wasn't enough.

    What should i do? I was thinking i would probably like tape a container of piss to my inner thigh prior to the event, that way it would be the desired temperature. But I was hoping that someone here would have first hand knowledge.

    Thanks
    :peace:
  2.  
    anywhere311

    anywhere311 Well-Known Member

    drink water... really all i can tell u since its so close to the day
  3.  
    Sherlock0824

    Sherlock0824 New Member

    try to find a system flush out kit.
  4.  
    dankforall

    dankforall New Member

    I have used my wife's piss to pass 2 drug tests. I had her piss across the street from the place in a container.(we have a dunkin dounuts across from the drug test place) I used a hand warmer (Hot hands) Put the piss and hot hand thing into my boot and put my pant leg over boot. Went into place filled out the paper gave my id and off to the bathroom. Once inside I got the piss out poured into the cup (my piss test cup had a temp guage on it so I made sure it went up enough) If it dont just touch the hot hands pad to the temp guage for a sec. Not too much you dont want it to get to hot. Then I put the empty container and hot hand pad back into my boot and flushed the toilet. I passed 2 this way at 2 different drug test places. I never had aproblem. I worried ALOT about my tests and it worked out great. If I ever have to take one again I will do the same thing! Good Luck
  5.  
    Tanuvan

    Tanuvan Well-Known Member

    That is pretty slick!
  6.  
    Crayola

    Crayola Well-Known Member

    that's an awesome idea. what did you use for the container? it has to be small and discreet yet large enough to hold 60 mL of piss.
  7.  
    PoseidonsNet

    PoseidonsNet Well-Known Member

    Go and live somewhere where they don't force you to do such dumb things.
  8.  
    smokinjs

    smokinjs Well-Known Member

    use a condom. and tape to you inner thigh. its gets pretty hot. but its worth it for a job.
  9.  
    Crayola

    Crayola Well-Known Member

    Alright. I've thought this one through completely. And i used parts of your ideas to make what i believe to be the master plan, at least, for my scenario.

    Materials Needed:
    1 Condom
    1 Piss Bottle
    1 Funnel (i used the nozzle end of a soda bottle)
    Tape
    Hand Warmers (optional)
    Small scissors, or needle - something small, discreet, and sharp

    Have a friend piss in the piss bottle - at least 60 mL. This is like filling a 20oz soda bottle about 2.5 inches. Then take the funnel and use it to fill the condom. If you fill the condom up as much as you can, that's about 75-85 mL, so you have plenty of room to tie a decent knot in the end.

    Now you have a little piss-condom water balloon. Before you go to your drug test, take some tape (I am using masking tape) and tape the knot end of the condom to your inner thigh. Tape around your leg in a circle, like you would a sports injury, so it really stays on and won't fall off or anything. Make sure that the condom is tied onto your leg a good 20 minutes prior to the event, so the piss will be warm.

    Now you essentially have another dick growing out of your leg. Your body will keep the piss at your body temperature, so it will pass the initial temperature exam. If for some reason you think your piss isn't warm enough, use your hand warmers, which you should probably crack open 5-10 minutes beforehand, so they've had time to warm up. When the time comes, drop ya drawers and use your sharp object to poke a hole in the "reservoir tip". Make sure your pinch the tip first, so that way no piss will just start shooting out. Then, aim into the cup and release! You're on your way to a passed drug test! You even could shoot some into the toilet to make it sound real realistic.

    Note: Make sure you rinse all of your materials thoroughly prior to use, especially the condom. Don't use soaps though, warm water should be fine.

    :peace:
  10.  
    xpyr0x666

    xpyr0x666 Active Member

    I might also add, use a condom that is NOT lubricated, to avoid that oily mess going into your piss cup.
    What if they want to watch you? Every urine test I've had to do involving probation or dui, or other police encounters there has ALWAYS been someone literally watching you hold your dick...
  11.  
    smokinjs

    smokinjs Well-Known Member

    you just re inacted my piss test a couple months ago. lol used that method twice ..easy as pie. i use a needle. and taped to my gouch. lol but i kinda like the extra dick method
  12.  
    dankforall

    dankforall New Member

    You dont need all of that work. I used a small bottle they sell it at walmart by the small travel size area. They sell small empty conatiners for air travel. If you shampoo is too big you must dump some into this small one and bring it. My wife pissed right into the small plastic contaier with a screw top. No cutting no chance of a condum breaking. Quick clean easy. My bottle was 3.5 inches tall and as round as a quarter. And when i say hand warmers I dont mean the kind you lite and put into a case. they has small ones you just shakw and they turn on. very slim and works great to keep the piss warm. Even with your body heat the piss will cool off very fast. the hand warmer is a must atleast it was for me. I had gotten a simple possission and for my conditional discharge I had to take 2 piss test 6 months apart from each other but both within 1 year. I passed them both with EASE. You are diffently on the right track. Have the person go with you and piss as cloes to the test place as poss. But dont bring them in i always go in alone.
  13.  
    smokinjs

    smokinjs Well-Known Member

    yep my friend pisses in the parking lot for me. temp was 98 hellz ya
  14.  
    dankforall

    dankforall New Member

    Its the way to go.
  15.  
    MyNameIsHead

    MyNameIsHead Well-Known Member

    dude
    you need to buy that stuff that cost like $50 from gnc
    it doesnt clean out your system but covers up the piss
    i know 4 people who took it right before or the night before
    drink a shit load of water then druink that whole bottle and youll pass
  16.  
    smokinjs

    smokinjs Well-Known Member

    thats for people who like smoke once in awhile , but if youve been smoking daily for over atleast one month. that shit is no good. ive used vale before, and i failed. but the ocasionall toker , it works.
  17.  
    Crayola

    Crayola Well-Known Member

    ok, i took the test and, as far as the actual execution of my plan, it went perfectly. the condom didn't break, and the manicure scissors worked perfectly. i was a bit worried about the temperature, though. i ended up using hand warmers (the $0.99 shake-to-activate ones). i'll find out whether i passed or not probably by wednesday.

    i would add that it's probably best, if at all possible, to bring your friend with you. this way they can piss in the container right before the test, and it'll be the right temperature. everything else, though, worked perfectly for me.
  18.  
    dankforall

    dankforall New Member

    That shit dont work. I have failed 100 drug test and that is not an exaggeration. I used every product out there and failed everyone. The only ones I passed was with my wifes piss.
  19.  
    dankforall

    dankforall New Member

    I hope you pass. Usually if there is a problem with temp they tell you right away so you can repiss before you leave. I use the shake to activate ones also!
  20.  
    yezzi

    yezzi Member

    So, did you ever end up passing the test?? I'm using my friend's urine, and using the same tactics you've described, also, i'm having her take a piss in the bathroom of where I have to take the test. The lab is up stairs of where my friend is going to be using the bathroom, so I know they wont notice. Do you think its still necessary that I get hand warmers? Also, I'm a female and have large breasts, so I was planning on putting the condom in between my breast. (which is always warm). A quick reply would be great!! I know this thread was over 3 years ago.... thanxx :)

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