Calling All Daddy's. Need Advice

I am a daddy of 2 boys. One is 17 months and the other is 4 months. Im 35 and have served in the military in Iraq and Afghanistan. They tell me i suffer from PTSD (post tramatic stress disorder). They had me taking different meds and they all made me impossible to live with so i quit taking them. I smoked pot before, during and after i served and its the only thing that helps me through the day. I also suffer with restless leg syndrome. Me and my wife both agree that marijuana is something thats a positive thing in our lives and is something that, without a doubt, is a FAR better alternative to the synthetic drugs the VA doctors were prescribing me. That being said, i could use some advice on how i should handle the situation with my boys. Its a very touchy subject that our society has made taboo. I want to make sure I handle it the right way because raising them right is the MOST important thing in the world to me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Just let the boys be boys.I am a father of 3 boys and i just let them play and have fun this is what kids are supposed to do.

Smoking. Do I let them see me smoke? Do i hide it from them and wait until they ask me about it? Would that damage the trust? Do i tell them its my medicine? School and most of society will be telling them marijuana is bad. How would i convince them its a good thing for DADDY?

cadeneli said:

Smoking. Do I let them see me smoke? Do i hide it from them and wait until they ask me about it? Would that damage the trust? Do i tell them its my medicine? School and most of society will be telling them marijuana is bad. How would i convince them its a good thing for DADDY?

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You tell them the truth.I would hide it from them while they are young.I dont smoke in front of none of my boys.My wife dont let me smoke around her while the baby is being conceived.So i would def wait until they are big enough to understand but i dont think i would smoke in front of my kids.But one thing is for sure if my kids do decide to smoke i would rather them do it in house instead of outside while its still illegal.

They will want to do whatever you are doing. So just keep the smoking out of sight, along with all items that go with it, and maybe pop some gum before you go pickup the babies. But other than that sounds like your doing fine already!

Cad few things thank you 4 ur service and thanks 4 thread. I 2 am a parent and continue to debate this issue. My situation is my son is 18 and has a list mental issues thanks 2 the fantastic genitics his mom and I provided, Lol I don't believe he knows I smoke weed (he knows I used 2 smoke thanks 2 his mom) -I smoke cigarettes and only smoke outside. I have friends that r very open with their kids ages 18 13 10 , they Do Not smoke with them but they don't hide it. They basically sat them down and told them the truth when they asked because of trust. They also let them know why they should not do it until they are older due 2 development of their brains. Now one of my problems I have with my son is he is a natural born snitch---It doesn't matter who did what including himself ----I tell everyone don't do or say anything u don't want repeated. I wish I could be open with my son so I could not feel as hypocritical I agree with the folks who posted b4 me out of sight out of mind until they need 2 know - my mom kinda had this rule - If your gonna do it do it here so I know your safe... Not giving advice just sharing ---- Again Cad thanks 4 the thread +rep and sub'd now share some grow tips Lol

Thanks for the advice. I was thinking it would be best to hide it until they asked one day. Maybe by then they'll know their daddy is a good human being that jus needs a little help through the day. Then sit down and have that talk with them. See I live in texas so its much more taboo here than cali. Any fool should know drinking is a far worse habit. Hell, who knows what it will be like in 15 years. I dont drink or do any other drugs. Ive been down that road already and im not going back. Thanks again.

40yr old army vet and fellow texan here.........glad to see youre not taking those meds, mj is a much better alternative. but.......Texas law doesnt play when it comes to god's gift to man. as for the issue with your kids....theyre still kids and will be for many years to come. i wouldnt worry too much about it until you have to start having those certain talks about life, usually preteenish age, when kids really start forming their own opinions. ive got a 12 yr old neice who recently discovered my mj usage and questioned me about it. was kind of funny because of what shed already been told in school, basically that i was a bad guy and i was breaking the law. the only part she agreed with was the law breaking! her mother and i talked with her about mj and the reasons and effects of its usage....which only got the usual preteen reaction. but at least now when she encounters mj out in public she wont be so in awe of it, might not be so drawn to peer pressure and might even ask questions. and she was told by her favorite uncle(me) that if she touches the stuff before she turns 18 ill beat the pretty out of her.....after her mom gets done!

I'm a PTSD poppa as well... And weed helps big time, but be very careful with this, the VA can and will discontinue your benefits if they become wise to your mj use... MJ helps with my anxiety disorder alot, it also helps me sleep at night... Doesnt help with my headaches I get every single day tho..

I'm not a parent myself but I started raising other peoples kids at age 11 no lie... At 17 I had become acting guardian for my 3yr old neice, 2yr old nephew, and infant neice..now the 3 year old at this time already knew about it her parents always had it around her myself included..and before anyone flips I'm not proud of what I did as a strung out teen..anyways when my oldest neice was about 1 she went to parties with her mom usually the ones I was at she began taking the pieces and copying our behavior I tried to get her parents to stop but they didn't now at 7 she tells people my aunty smokes marijuana and talks about it from years ago...keep it away till they ask you...this situation has been my only regret in life

Weed is not a drug and is better than anythang man made. I am a father also you can`t hide it so PLEACE do not be ashamed. it is the herb of life and will not kill. and helps with PTSD I know this from my own experaince.......anti depressents KILL and there is prof.......peace........and thanks again.

I say hide it form them until they do it themselves.. Or are curious. I started smoking when I was 13 and when I was 15 I started getting caught with it a lot by my parents, and then my dad would play videogames with me, while we sat down and shared a 1/5.. And rarely he would pull out a joint, you just gotta give it time. Just give him hints along the way with DARE and stuff that it isn't all bad, and make sure and tell them that the DARE officers don't tell the full truth about mary..

do wat u gotta do man u cant really hide form your kid but u also shouldnt push it on them either id say take it out side of if u have an office do it there. but overall teaching them right from wrong is whats important and letting them know how much u care for them. oh and teach then about credit i still wanna give my parent a crotch shot for not telling me about the money sie of life beside the fact that it oesnt grow on trees. lol. but hey ur there dad when the time is right youll know what they can or cand handle i been drinking with dad since i was 12 and ive never been an alcoholic except the first year of college where as you have no choice.

I appreciate all the advice my friends. These kids don't come with a manual. I wanted a different perspective from someone who's been there. I'm sure it will all fall into place. Planning ahead is never a bad thing. Thanks again. And chronic, I'll remember the credit thing. I don't want to get kicked in the crotch. Lol

Its never good to lie. I know it seems best not to expose them at an early age. But kids are not dumb. They will find out sooner or later and when they do, they will be confronted with the reality that dad lied to them and wanted to hide this from them. Which will lead to more curiosity. I say educate them. I live in Colorado and have my license. My kids know that I grow. When I explain to them what it is and what it is used for I put weed in the same category of any other medicine that the doctor prescribes. My kids know that they can not use any drugs that the doctor did not prescribe to them. My kids are 13 and 11 and to them it is no different than the bottle of heart burn medicine in my cabinet. They understand that no matter what the drug is that they will be breaking the law if they use it without a doctors prescription. Just be honest. As far as it being taboo in society, I teach my kids to be who they are no matter what other people think. Its a political issue, some people will agree and some will disagree and that rings true with any opinion.

I would hide it from them until they are older. They are too young to understand what's really going on for awhile. Once they are old enough you can be reasonable and explain the situation to them.

I'm gonna buy this book when my son gets a bit older

http://www.justaplant.com/

You need to inform your children about making good decisions regarding life in general. The good, bad and the consequences for their actions. Smoking/using marijuana isn't even the tip of the iceberg. Some may say it's harmless and so on and so forth, however it is illegal to date. So, in a sense where you may want to express to your children the rationale behind your usage, you are condoning a blatant disrespect for the law, which could lead to further backlashes in the long run. I'm only playing devil's advocate here, but really examine why you would want to inform your kids about your usage. For now allow them to be kids and avoid allowing them see you smoking. What may be good for you may not be for them, and although experimenting is a way of life, I'm not certain giving them the green light is the right path.