Warning..this is long..
So my sister and her boyfriend were living with my mom for awhile because my sister had a baby (she was 19) and had no where to go. My mom didn't ask them to pay any rent until recently because she wanted to help them out so that her boyfriend could pay off his bills (he's 26 with a 6 year old already) and then they could eventually move out. Well they were living there for almost two years, rent free, and he never really helped out my mom around the house. I'll admit that they did abuse her generosity and he could've contributed a lot more but here is the rest of the story..
Well first here's a little background on the boyfriend; he lived in a bad part of the city, his family..well is kind of trashy, a quarter of his friends are drug addicts and another quarter are in jail, and he used to be a drug addict himself but he went to rehab and doesnt (and hasn't for a few years) done anything other than smoke everyday and drink. My mom has always had a thing against him since day one because of his past and because she thinks my sister could do way better than him, which she could, but she loves him and it's her own choice to stay with him.
So to the real story.. the other night they go out after the baby feel asleep to smoke a little. The baby is old enough now that she hardly ever wakes up and even if she did, my mom was still home. Well the baby wakes up and my mom is looking for them and I guess she looks out of the window or something and sees them smoking in his car outside. Supposedly she says they were out there for 40 minutes, but I have no idea how big the blunt would've had to be for them to be out there for so long, haha. Well they come back in and my mom flips out on them, acting like they were out there smoking crack or something. And she says she doesn't want them bringing it in her house (even though he's always kept it in his car). She also said that "they can't expect her to watch their baby while they're out there getting high" and she threatened to call child services and wouldn't give my sister back her baby. The boyfriend argued with her saying it's not that bad and she ended up telling him to get the fuck out of her house and also hinted that she wanted my sister to leave if she was going to be doing "drugs". Obviously my sister wouldn't want to stay there anyway after that and also without her boyfriend, so she's leaving now.
Now before this ever happened my mom thought my sister was a great mother (which she is), my sister had straight a's in college, and everything in her and her boyfriend's life was fine. So all of a sudden after she finds out that she smoked she thinks she's a horrible mother and can't take care of her kid? My mom also thinks that the boyfriend is "dragging her into this" and that it's only going to get worse because weed is obviously a gateway drug. She even went as far as to say they'd end up like my aunt (who just got out of rehab for coke). I know my sister has never and probably will never try any other drugs because she's not that type of person and she's not a dumb girl.
And I respect the fact that my mom was paying the bills, it's her house, and the bottom line is that she has the right to say what will and will not happen in her house, but I think the desicion she made was a little ridiculous. I can see kicking the boyfriend out because she thought he was disrespecting her and not contributing, but she basically kicked both of them out and it was only because of some marijuana. I see no harm in my sister smoking since it doesn't adversly affect her life at all and she never even does it while the baby is awake. And my mom attacking her saying she's a bad mother is just wrong. I told her that I want to talk to her tomorrow about it and I need some help of what to say to change her bias against weed. Oh yeah, and my mom is an "OTC (over the counter) addict" and takes advil (probably about 8-12) everyday, sudafed, and 3 or 4 different weight loss pills that I can't imagine are any good for you. She also "needs" at least a glass of wine a day to "ease all her stress" yet sees no problem with drinking wine or drinking vodka (which she does every weekend).
So do you guys think she over reacted? And any ideas of what to say to her? I was thinking of telling her to read the abovetheignorance website and the one about how marijuana became illegal.
Please be serious though with the suggestions, no rude comments or anything because..well because they'll just piss me off more than I already am.
Thanks for any help!
So my sister and her boyfriend were living with my mom for awhile because my sister had a baby (she was 19) and had no where to go. My mom didn't ask them to pay any rent until recently because she wanted to help them out so that her boyfriend could pay off his bills (he's 26 with a 6 year old already) and then they could eventually move out. Well they were living there for almost two years, rent free, and he never really helped out my mom around the house. I'll admit that they did abuse her generosity and he could've contributed a lot more but here is the rest of the story..
Well first here's a little background on the boyfriend; he lived in a bad part of the city, his family..well is kind of trashy, a quarter of his friends are drug addicts and another quarter are in jail, and he used to be a drug addict himself but he went to rehab and doesnt (and hasn't for a few years) done anything other than smoke everyday and drink. My mom has always had a thing against him since day one because of his past and because she thinks my sister could do way better than him, which she could, but she loves him and it's her own choice to stay with him.
So to the real story.. the other night they go out after the baby feel asleep to smoke a little. The baby is old enough now that she hardly ever wakes up and even if she did, my mom was still home. Well the baby wakes up and my mom is looking for them and I guess she looks out of the window or something and sees them smoking in his car outside. Supposedly she says they were out there for 40 minutes, but I have no idea how big the blunt would've had to be for them to be out there for so long, haha. Well they come back in and my mom flips out on them, acting like they were out there smoking crack or something. And she says she doesn't want them bringing it in her house (even though he's always kept it in his car). She also said that "they can't expect her to watch their baby while they're out there getting high" and she threatened to call child services and wouldn't give my sister back her baby. The boyfriend argued with her saying it's not that bad and she ended up telling him to get the fuck out of her house and also hinted that she wanted my sister to leave if she was going to be doing "drugs". Obviously my sister wouldn't want to stay there anyway after that and also without her boyfriend, so she's leaving now.
Now before this ever happened my mom thought my sister was a great mother (which she is), my sister had straight a's in college, and everything in her and her boyfriend's life was fine. So all of a sudden after she finds out that she smoked she thinks she's a horrible mother and can't take care of her kid? My mom also thinks that the boyfriend is "dragging her into this" and that it's only going to get worse because weed is obviously a gateway drug. She even went as far as to say they'd end up like my aunt (who just got out of rehab for coke). I know my sister has never and probably will never try any other drugs because she's not that type of person and she's not a dumb girl.
And I respect the fact that my mom was paying the bills, it's her house, and the bottom line is that she has the right to say what will and will not happen in her house, but I think the desicion she made was a little ridiculous. I can see kicking the boyfriend out because she thought he was disrespecting her and not contributing, but she basically kicked both of them out and it was only because of some marijuana. I see no harm in my sister smoking since it doesn't adversly affect her life at all and she never even does it while the baby is awake. And my mom attacking her saying she's a bad mother is just wrong. I told her that I want to talk to her tomorrow about it and I need some help of what to say to change her bias against weed. Oh yeah, and my mom is an "OTC (over the counter) addict" and takes advil (probably about 8-12) everyday, sudafed, and 3 or 4 different weight loss pills that I can't imagine are any good for you. She also "needs" at least a glass of wine a day to "ease all her stress" yet sees no problem with drinking wine or drinking vodka (which she does every weekend).
So do you guys think she over reacted? And any ideas of what to say to her? I was thinking of telling her to read the abovetheignorance website and the one about how marijuana became illegal.
Please be serious though with the suggestions, no rude comments or anything because..well because they'll just piss me off more than I already am.
Thanks for any help!
