Ask Neo Landers

Grandpapy said:

I have a fear of running out of matches and lighters.

How can I get over this?

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tangerinegreen555 said:

I've recently read that the sun will collapse into a black hole in 7 billion years

But we don't get the entire 7 billion years, in 600 million years the sun will get too hot and vaporize the oceans.

So I feel kind of cheated. What can I do to cheer up?

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neosapien said:

Take a scolding hot shower in a bathtub of rum with a dolphin.

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curious2garden said:

Dear Neo Landers,
Will low sodium Club Soda work in place of Seltzer water and what size club do I need to use?
Thank you,
High and Dry

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curious2garden said:

Dear Neo Landers,
Will low sodium Club Soda work in place of Seltzer water and what size club do I need to use?
Thank you,
High and Dry

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neosapien said:

You need high sodium Club Soda. and an 11 iron.

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Grandpapy said:

and can I use it after I set myself alight.

(just sampled some fruity pebble extract....nice!)

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curious2garden said:

I miss @Indacouch

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Grandpapy said:

I was looking forward to some exotic tattoo stories.

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curious2garden said:

Can I substitute a Rowenta iron? I'm really thirsty.

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curious2garden said:

Can I substitute a Rowenta iron? I'm really thirsty.

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cannabineer said:

Dear Neo Landers,

I made the mistake of leaving my case of Club Soda out. My pet baby seal is offended now. What should I do, assuming I do not wish to fate my seal?

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lokie said:

What is the proper response to when my crazy cuz always shouts out "Hey, pull my finger!"

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