An ethical dilema

I had lunch with one of my very best friends yesterday.


She is not against drug use, she loves her husband, she rarely uses anything but most things tend to make her "sea sick" she calls it.

I commonly check on my closer friends to see if they are doing all right, not straying off course, and the like.


Now he had not known much about pills in general before I met him, he was all about powders. I cought wind of a couple thousand norcos up for sale and convinced him to go in for half, which he did.

That was years ago and he has been a hydro guy ever since. They are hard to get as some of us know, and over the years I have introduced him to other things, soma being one.

When I asked my friend's wife how he was doing she said "the soma is turning him into a perfect asshole, I am thinking of leaving him". We talked about this and found that he was always going to take some sort of pills, that he was prone to using them until they were gone and that the only thing that made him worse was coke. He can't find coke anymore and I depend on my own laziness to keep it from entering my house. But Soma flows freely here.


the last part of the equation is this, My friend and I share stuff, if he is out of something that I happen to have some of, I will make the effort to ensure he has some. He has given me all sorts of things he has come across but as I say, we do not withold from each other.


He called me this morning and said he was out of everything and did I have any soma? It was on voice mail.


Is it my responsibility to ensure he isn't an asshole?
Do I simply tell him what his wife told me in confidence?
Do I lie to him and say I don't have any?

That is a tough one. Ideally she would tell him that it's her or the Soma and you guys could figure something out for other stuff. I'd talk to her since what she told you was in confidence and let her know you're having this dilemma.

any chance you, he and the wife could sit down for a discussion about this?

I'm sure if she told you that she was thinking about leaving him, then she has probably told him as well. I would help him out and give him some soma, but that's just me... and because of that last part of the equation that you posted.

Skuxx said:

I'm sure if she told you that she was thinking about leaving him, then she has probably told him as well. I would help him out and give him some soma, but that's just me... and because of that last part of the equation that you posted.

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Yeah, that's the problem with all of this. You may have read another of my stories where a guy offered me his icecream truck for an ounce or so of blow - I turned him down, I didn't know him all that well and I did know he had kids and a wife and needed the truck - I didn't want to be the source of that kind of agony for his family - I have trouble knowingly contributing to drug induced strife - but, this guy is one of those true friends. I don't want to preach (well, not too much), or tell old guy stories (yes I do) but I find that the older one gets the fewer real friends he has. He either winds up with his wife's friends friends, good people or not, or he simply winds up not talking to people about intimate issues - hell I do that more on this site than I do in person mostly. Anyway he is that kind of friend and I think I'm down to two of them. I don't have the patience to look for more.

And BarnBuster? that's a pretty good idea. I got another person write me and say something interesting.


When I used to get blow - for my wife, we had a pact, she would hide it from me and I would hide the grinder and such from her. The only time we would use it is when we both agreed - that worked pretty well.


Well his wife commonly searches his bags and pockets - not in a nasty way (though, I have been so long with the same woman I am with now partly because we don't go through each other's pockets or purse or computers or phones - EVER), but when she finds his little stashes of pills she will put them somewhere else and he has to ask her for them.

It works out for her because she can be away if he takes them. It works out for him because he has them longer.

The problem with ME is that, well, I believe in buying a lot of something when I can and he knows it. I dunno, maybe I should simply give HER the soma and tell him I did it that way. She is only slightly less cool than my wife.

My wife has an alcohol problem. I had a choice, I could either leave her or tell her to stop drinking. But... But.... I like to drink and I'm damned if I am going to tell her not to as I sip my scotch. And I value a little of this or that other than alcohol. I figured if it came to that I could still get her high on something, so she wouldn't have to spend the rest of her life with me sober - no one want s that. I can't imagine anyone spending the rest of their life with me - SOBER fergodsake.

So, she will only drink, glass by glass after she has asked my permission and will never ever cop an attitude when I tell her no.


Seems to work. Maybe I could give them to her?

Problem I think is the same old one, those of us who become assholes on one drug or another rarely believe they are assholes - some NEVER do, some I guess actually enjoy it.

I'm a happy drunk, a delightful opiate user, a morose and reclusive pot smoker, an asshole on speed, a monster who barely controls himself on mushrooms and an angry son of a bitch on..... clobazam.

Am I rambling again? it's raining out and I just took some..... soma a while ago.

I think if hes ur friend u should tel him what a dumbass hes.bein....wtf?!?!....somas??...are u kidding me...there absolutely terrible...n they cost like 50cents a piece....here anyway...u cant give em away...I knew a girl who.was soma'd out all the time n she was a straight bafoon when she was on em...stumblin everywhere n tlkn like she was drunk...she lost her job n everything...hell no dnt give him any of those stupid ass somas....
just my opinion....thats what id do...id break it down to him...ur a smart guy so im sure ur buddy is too...somas arent for smart ppl

ah damn my bad...I just read the rest...u like em too.....idk what to say then....hook him up...u cant b hypocritical(eating them urself n holdin out on ur buddy)
u gotta give em to him now....

I like to have a little for an emergency on hand but otherwise I give my wife most of the sedatives that come into my possession.

I never deal with any dudes lady, and especially not "in confidence".

I would discuss it directly with him.

Best of luck regardless.

MrEDuck said:

I like to have a little for an emergency on hand but otherwise I give my wife most of the sedatives that come into my possession.

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I nvr found em good for anything except makin me walk crooked...i hate xanax n valium along w the soma...anything that gives me that zombie feeling aint my thing....I.shldnt say they're bad.tho not.everyone enjoys the same.type of buzz....I guess I have run across ppl who loved em...but those ppl love anything that fks em up....if.they.could only see themselves wlkn around in that soma coma they may change their mind abt em...ive watched somas fk a few ppl up.....if ur buddy's. bout to lose his girl over dope its time to chill...lifes not worth fkn up over dope...ive fkd up lots of good relationships over dope in my time....a lifetimes worth....and I have many regrets today because of it.

Ok, another old man story then. When I was 19 or so, I worked at a paint factory - I learned my first lesson from an old guy there. the factory sat on two HUGE underground tanks of solvent - can't recall which now (lost my favorite dog over it, he used to keep me company but wound up drinking from water collected on some of the drums out back - he got bladder cancer). So this old guy walked me through the factory and took an instant liking to me "Canndo? you know there really are only two kinds of men in the world", as he took out his zippo I watched as some people actually started sauntering - quickly, toward the door, a few others ran at us. "them that runs away and them that don't".

True story, I never again saw him pull the same trick.

Anyway, a salesman there used to get milltowns and on occasion he would give me one or two - I LOVED them. Now miltowns were all the rage until valium overtook them. Miltown is meprobamate.

You with me? Huxley's "Brave New World" describes a drug, the Perfect drug, that is used to calm the population without inhibiting their abilites otherwise. It was called "soma"

Soma, the actual drug is carisoprodol and carisoprodol metabolizes very rapidly into.... meprobamate.


That bit of history combined with the fact that it is an excelent opiate enhancer is why I like Soma. One develops a tolerance for the effects rapidly but until that time, they are rather pleasant.

Got to remember also that he acts completely differently around me, so I have to take her word for this stuff. I just texted her and said the next time I come by I will bring HER some so she can dole it out - when he calls again I will tell her the same thing. He knows the two of us got together for drinks and such yesterday so I can tell him sort of, anyway, that soma and his relationship don't seem to mix.

Well canndo,as you know I'm recently trying to use,medicinally,drugs that calm me down..I finished our convo and the guy showed up with a sack of colonipin..I accepted one 10mg..perhaps if these drugs are causing strife in your friends life,talk to him..let him know of your concern over his relationship with his wife,and hell,possibly you(it seems kinda annoying from my perspective)..I accepted the drug from my friend,but told my wife exactly what,why and when ill be taking the drug,and calmed her fears(she knows of my past history of drugs)...honesty is allways the best policy,even if it results in one of the parties being upset a little..his wife is allready upset,and he's obviously on a bender that he can't control..either you talk to him,help him,or hell be askin junkie joe for help I feel(all the wives hate junkie joe..)..hope it works out whatever method of alleviation you choose...good luck!

canndo said:

You with me? Huxley's "Brave New World" describes a drug, the Perfect drug, that is used to calm the population without inhibiting their abilites otherwise. It was called "soma"

Soma, the actual drug is carisoprodol and carisoprodol metabolizes very rapidly into.... meprobamate.

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Wasn't soma the name of the ancient drug mentioned in the Vedas in early Indo-European culture?

More on topic, not even being (that) old of a man yet I've had similar experiences. I have a history of doing drugs with my best friend Bobby, and after he got engaged his fiance politely asked me not to bring drugs around as much. Now clearly his appetite haven't diminished, so I'm in a similar vein.

I am good friends with his fiance as it seems you are with your friend's wife, and that really makes it a conundrum. Now I can't speak for your situation, but we kind of came up with a implicit agreement; when its just him and I, all rules are off, and when its all 3 of us no cocaine or psychs. I don't know if this could help your situation as it seems the use is more day to day, but maybe something can be reached between all 3? Probably the best advice is the previous posters idea to have a sit down.

If not, there's the infamous court case of Bros v. Hos which I often find cited in many legal documents.

Niggas before 'i figures'...lol
I have a friend who sells meth..he's not proud of it..wants to get out(I been helping him with clones,advice for a grow)..but he has 4 people he says..they buy meth here and there for different reasons..(obviously they deal a little teeners or whatever)..but,hes(my friend) has been at it for over 25 years(he's 15 years older than me)..he has a strict code..and this is why now he has only four customers and went from dealing 2lbs at a time to 2oz at a time..he would never let people he dealt with put their lives in financial or mental or in family jeopardy..he is a sound guy and makes a lot of sense..and I feel him..recreationally drugs are great..too many can't take em for what their worth,and that's where the trouble arises..meth,coke,pills,smack,..hell..moonshine..sometimes it takes a real friend to say 'stop,its hurting you...'..my two cents...again..much love and good luck..its hard to have your friend angry at ya,and I feel he will be for a time if you do what's right in my opinion...

canndo said:

Ok, another old man story then. When I was 19 or so, I worked at a paint factory - I learned my first lesson from an old guy there. the factory sat on two HUGE underground tanks of solvent - can't recall which now (lost my favorite dog over it, he used to keep me company but wound up drinking from water collected on some of the drums out back - he got bladder cancer). So this old guy walked me through the factory and took an instant liking to me "Canndo? you know there really are only two kinds of men in the world", as he took out his zippo I watched as some people actually started sauntering - quickly, toward the door, a few others ran at us. "them that runs away and them that don't".

True story, I never again saw him pull the same trick.

Anyway, a salesman there used to get milltowns and on occasion he would give me one or two - I LOVED them. Now miltowns were all the rage until valium overtook them. Miltown is meprobamate.

You with me? Huxley's "Brave New World" describes a drug, the Perfect drug, that is used to calm the population without inhibiting their abilites otherwise. It was called "soma"

Soma, the actual drug is carisoprodol and carisoprodol metabolizes very rapidly into.... meprobamate.


That bit of history combined with the fact that it is an excelent opiate enhancer is why I like Soma. One develops a tolerance for the effects rapidly but until that time, they are rather pleasant.

Got to remember also that he acts completely differently around me, so I have to take her word for this stuff. I just texted her and said the next time I come by I will bring HER some so she can dole it out - when he calls again I will tell her the same thing. He knows the two of us got together for drinks and such yesterday so I can tell him sort of, anyway, that soma and his relationship don't seem to mix.

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cool story......

rory420420 said:

Well canndo,as you know I'm recently trying to use,medicinally,drugs that calm me down..I finished our convo and the guy showed up with a sack of colonipin..I accepted one 10mg..perhaps if these drugs are causing strife in your friends life,talk to him..let him know of your concern over his relationship with his wife,and hell,possibly you(it seems kinda annoying from my perspective)..I accepted the drug from my friend,but told my wife exactly what,why and when ill be taking the drug,and calmed her fears(she knows of my past history of drugs)...honesty is allways the best policy,even if it results in one of the parties being upset a little..his wife is allready upset,and he's obviously on a bender that he can't control..either you talk to him,help him,or hell be askin junkie joe for help I feel(all the wives hate junkie joe..)..hope it works out whatever method of alleviation you choose...good luck!

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junky joe...ha

yeah my wife hates all the junky joes I know....ive had.to.change fone nmbrs bout three times in the past year...not by choice n not that it actually affects anything...ha..i guess her philosophy is "if they dont know his nnbr they cant contact him"...I can nvr convince her that when it comes to that "problem" im my own worst enemy n have never needed outside infuence nor have been victim to outside influence...I stay clean for the most part...weed n subs...man's gotta have a little treat now n then tho....its a stressful world

Sorry to hear about your friends troubles. Since you are close with both, staying on the same page is probably a good idea.

Side note, I've been on Soma for years. Easily one of the better muscle relaxers that mesh well with opiates. Fuck having a bad spine. Soma honestly makes my day easier to get through plus I've never had any negative side effects when stopping abruptly.

In a similar moral issue myself with a friend who is dating a deadbeat. He's a great friend but is desperate. Always seeming to find low quality women. I feel like I need to have a heart to heart with him. Straight edge dude before but this welfare queen collecting babies daddies has him seeking drugs for her so she doesn't get sick and flipping others for her and her friends. Just greasy.