Favorite stupid joke...?

The teacher pointed to the metal rooster on the roof in a book they were reading and asked if anyone knew
what it was.
Johnny replied, Thats a cock

Thats correct answered the teacher.
Do you know why they use a cock for a weather vein?

Johnny proudly exclaimed. "Because if they used a cunt the wind would whistle tough through it!"

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh Little Johnny............ you filthy bastard...

My fav joke is this one.

A dude in the bar spilled his drink on his shirt and started freaking.

Bartender asked wtf homie?

Well explained the guy my wife is going to kick me out for good if she finds out I`ve drank yet again.

The tender laughs as he deals with these problems daily.
Here is what you do. Put a 20 in your shirt pocket and tell her someone at the office party spilled
on your shirt and gave you the 20 to cover the cleaning.

Much releived the drunkard continued to get plastered and headed home to sleep it off.

Morning comes to find his wife insane, throwing his shit out of the house etc..

He told her to calm down and he explained the spill and the 20 in the pocket.

She yelled there was 40 in the pocket to which he replied.

Oh yeah ,,, He shit my pants too.

Q: How do you top a car?
A: Tep on the brake, Tupid.

Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit?
A: Unique up on him.
Q2: How do you catch a tame rabbit?
A2: Tame way; unique up on him. cn

Whats red sits in a tree and says meow meow?
A mentally retarded apple.

And yes before you get pissed I`m 1/2 retarded on my mothers side

guess what? chicken butt

Originally Posted by olylifter420

guess what? chicken butt

That was a staple with my kids.
Guess why? Cowpie!!!

here's s dumb knock knock favorite of mine..

knock knock..
who's there?
interrupting cow..
then as the person is saying interrupting cow who, you say...
mooo...