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Kids say the darndest things...

Discussion in 'Toke N Talk' started by neosapien, Jan 31, 2017.

  1.  
    mo841

    mo841 Well-Known Member

    Driving around at night one day my son was like look at that place, we have to go there. He was pointing at one of the brightly lit strip clubs on 8 mile . I told him one day we will lol.think he was like 8 at the time
     
    Possum1, mr sunshine, DST and 7 others like this.
  2.  
    neosapien

    neosapien Well-Known Member

    Maybe not funny but an observation.... At home it's starting to become more and more noticeable that my 4 year old's English vocabulary is going to overtake my wife's very soon. The rate at which she is devouring knowledge is totally awesome to watch.
     
    Possum1, mr sunshine, DST and 8 others like this.
  3.  
    v.s one

    v.s one Well-Known Member

    I was snoozing one day and my boy wakes me up. GUESSE WHAT MOM WEARS A DIAPER AND IT HaD A CACA Stain. Fast forward about 7 years. I explain why women wear diapers. The other day my wife is yelling at him to get ready . He looks at her and says it's time for you to wear your diaper. Huh? Fucking smart ass was right.
     
  4.  
    a senile fungus

    a senile fungus Well-Known Member


    I used to live right over there. Eye candy for sure, lots of neon lights and shiny things.
     
    Possum1, mr sunshine and mo841 like this.
  5.  
    whitebb2727

    whitebb2727 Well-Known Member

    Poop gets everywhere when they are little. I hate the ones that blow out the front. Above the belly button.


    My first kid was at the age we would lay her in the floor and she wouldn't move off the blanket. She was laying there on a blanket one day and crapped real bad. I get the diaper off and clean her. I set the diaper to the side and put a new one on. Knock at the door. Got to go outside and sign for a package.

    I walk back in and apparently from the time I stood up and signs then come back in, she learned how to roll around.

    She managed to roll to the diaper and get it everywhere.
     
  6.  
    jerryb73

    jerryb73 Well-Known Member

    I feel the same way bout my 5yr old except it's me she is gonna overtake.. lol.. English is the only language I speak but she definitely uses words and phrases that I don't and maybe never have.. she has 3 older siblings ( mine from previous marriage) that I swear she is smarter than at this age. She uses words(correctly) that I don't recall them using.. I'm older and "wiser"(maybe) lol now so that definitely makes a difference.. they are like sponges and soak up everything at an alarming rate..
     
    Possum1, mr sunshine, srh88 and 3 others like this.
  7.  
    jerryb73

    jerryb73 Well-Known Member

    My daughter called me in her room and asked me to help her put her doll heads back on the the correct bodies. So I grabbed a head and asked which body it went on, she says, maybe you should look at the bodies and figure it out o_O
     
    Possum1, Singlemalt, ttystikk and 3 others like this.
  8.  
    lokie

    lokie Well-Known Member

    Recently the adults in the room were having a meaningful, :roll:, political conversation
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    my 12yr old grandson speaks up:

    12yr old
    I think we should go with the popular vote.

    me
    Oh, you do do you? Well tell me what you think about water boarding.

    12yr old
    Huh? I don't know anything about that.
    [​IMG]

    Little sponge parrots aren't they?
    [​IMG]
     
  9.  
    neosapien

    neosapien Well-Known Member

    We've been reminiscing about our Disney trip and one of the highlights was the fact that she was almost 4 inches taller than last time and in turn could ride a whole new crop of rides. The Star Wars ride made an impression on her cuz she keeps walking around as Darth Vader holding her hand out going, "you don't know my power". It's pretty fucking adorable.
     
  10.  
    cannabineer

    cannabineer Ursus marijanus

    This sounds like a great excuse to keep reminding her that you ARE her father.

    [​IMG]
     
  11.  
    neosapien

    neosapien Well-Known Member

    Were on the same wavelength you and I. I was just about to get her this shirt.

    618-CxjuOEL._UY700_.jpg
     
  12.  
    cannabineer

    cannabineer Ursus marijanus

    oooh plus rep

    fully operational rep
     
    Singlemalt, Possum1, v.s one and 2 others like this.
  13.  
    jerryb73

    jerryb73 Well-Known Member

    We just took our daughter to the local fair yesterday and she is now tall enough for the next tier of rides. She loved it, she wants to ride them all, no fear.. love it..
     
    Possum1, srh88, DST and 4 others like this.
  14.  
    v.s one

    v.s one Well-Known Member

    I told my daughter to clean up her mess in the kitchen. Yesterday. She says don't cry over spilled milk. You ever hear that before. Man she caught me off guard with that one.lolz
     
  15.  
    DST

    DST Well-Known Member

    We arrived at the airport in Abu Dhabi in December. My son was 3 and a couple of months. He said to my wife. "Mummy, mummy, look at all the ghosts!":shock::grin:
     
  16.  
    Indacouch

    Indacouch Well-Known Member

    @Bob Zmuda ....gravity/physics do not apply with babies and diapers bro .....the new one likes to become a mustard container being ran over by a truck as soon as the diaper comes off ....or pee 12 feet beyond the changing table .......I bet all the non Dad's/parents thought I was talking about pee when I said mustard above ......lol
     
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  17.  
    Indacouch

    Indacouch Well-Known Member

    I remember my older boy coming home from just starting pre school telling me his new best friend is chocolate flavored ...:shock::shock:
     
  18.  
    Indacouch

    Indacouch Well-Known Member

    This ones from about an hour ago .....took 5 year old outside to hang out and play while cleaned up my court yard area from trimming some trees earlier ......he tells me mom is making a behavior chart for at home like the one he has at school

    I said --oh she is ,,well you better listen so you stay in the good colors.

    He says- dad it's not guna work .

    I asked him, why's that ?

    He says --Because,,Im guna tell mom I only know how to read when I'm at school ..

    Lol
     
  19.  
    lokie

    lokie Well-Known Member

    Previously posted. reposted here for record keeping and posterity.

    when told to go outside and play, my grandson says
    "but I'm an inside kind of guy"


    my youngest grandson came home from school one day and said "today we learned that a man has a penis. is it ok for me to say penis?" he was told yes that is an acceptable term for a part of a man's body.

    To that he replied " what about vagina? is that ok too?"
     
  20.  
    mr sunshine

    mr sunshine Well-Known Member

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