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Is this shit for real???!!! hire-a-killer.com

Discussion in 'Toke N Talk' started by JN811, Jan 14, 2010.

  1.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    Check it out http://hire-a-killer.com/ . A website to hire a hit man! Has to be run by the FBI. Anyone actually think this is legit?

    [​IMG]
  2.  
    ......

    ...... Well-Known Member

    Its legit im there employee of the month
  3.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    Anyone wanna fill out the contact form??
  4.  
    guitarzan420

    guitarzan420 Active Member

    It's bs. I wouldn't go looking on websites like that.:wall:
  5.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    Which one are you? They have names.
    email:
    # of targets: 1 2 3
    package desired: Standard Buy 1 - Half Off VIP
    relation to target:
    choice of killer: Mr. X Cobra Killer Agent Orange Angel of Death first available
    choice of method: Accident "Suicide" Poison Bullet Explosion Killer's Choice
    how did you hear about this site?
    comments/questions?
  6.  
    FuZZyBUDz

    FuZZyBUDz Well-Known Member

    sum kid made that shit, it looks sloppy. an agency would of been more porfessional...i would think, plus ON THE INTERNET???
  7.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    i have no intention of hiring anyone i just found it amusing
  8.  
    FuZZyBUDz

    FuZZyBUDz Well-Known Member


    DAMN it, UR right and i just clicked on the 'profiles'.....FUCK!... damn it JN!!!:lol:
  9.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    Im gonna have the feds knocking at my door soon...
  10.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    [​IMG]
    Isn't killing people against the law?
    It depends. Yes, there are laws that make it illegal to kill other people, but there are always exceptions. Under certain conditions, for instance in times of war or during self-defense, it is okay to kill.

    Laws aren't permanent, and they change. At one point, it was illegal to drink alcohol and illegal for women to vote. Some countries don't even have clear rules on legality of killing. Your government pays people to kill all the time. Why can't you do the same?

    Isn't killing people immoral?
    Hire-a-Killer does not condone violence or murder. We will not accept any requests for cruel or unusual treatment of targets. The truth is, in any relatively free society, if there's a demand for a service, a business is going to emerge to meet that demand. In America and other industrialized nations, there is a demand for contract killing and Hire-a-Killer is trying to meet that demand in a friendly and professional manner. We do not presume to dictate an inhumane set of morals, we are first and foremost a business organization that seeks to make its customers happy.
    How can I be sure that I am safe if I use your services?
    Hire-a-Killer understands the risk involved in taking out a contract on someone's life. That is why we make sure that our transactions are as discreet and confidential as possible. We also guarantee your innocence by providing you with a helpful packet that includes tips on how to obtain an alibi during the time and date of the hit. We suggest that you delete all e-mail correspondences with H.A.K. as soon as you read them and follow the instructions in the provided packet to guarantee your safety.

    How will I know if you've done your end of the deal?
    At the end of the job, you will receive a friendly completion e-mail that will alert you that the services you requested have been completed successfully.

    What methods of payment do you accept?
    We strongly encourage you to use cash or wire transfers via Western Union, because they are the safest, most untracable methods of transferring funds. However, we realize that many people may not have the amount of money to pay for the services of a professional killer all at once, which is why we've made the decision to accept credit cards. As of now, we accept Visa, MasterCards and Discover.
    [​IMG]


    I'm an aspiring contract killer. How can I get a job with hire-a-killer.com?
    Hire a killer is very selective about choosing its employees, however, as our business expands, we will be interviewing candidates to add to our expert team. Send your resume to [email protected]

  11.  
    IAm5toned

    IAm5toned Well-Known Member

    [​IMG]

    muuuwaaahahahahaha :twisted:
    i want a free shirt
  12.  
    2much

    2much Active Member

    of course its legit! its on the internet isnt it?
  13.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    LMFAO someone should inquire about getting a position as a hit man
  14.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    [​IMG]
    Here are some testimonials from real people whose lives were improved by our services. Names have been changed and pictures have been edited to protect the identity of the customers.
    [​IMG]My neighbor let his dogs crap on my yard and then denied it. I couldn't see us reaching an agreement, so I consulted Hire-A-Killer and they gave me a great rate and an extremely fast service. Now I have a clean yard and new pet-less neighbors. Thanks H.A.K.!
    - Bill K., W. Virginia
    [​IMG]My husband left me for his secretary so I killed him and got tons of insurance money. Thank you H.A.K. for making it possible!
    - Joan W., Ohio
    [​IMG]My future mother-in-law was driving me crazy and turning my fiance against me. H.A.K. provided me with the best wedding gift I could ever wish for. Their mother's day special was unbeatable!
    - Toby L., New Hampshire
    [​IMG]
    When I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend, the pain of their betrayal was unbearable. I knew that I could never trust either of them again, so I took advantage of H.A.K.'s "buy one get one half off" offer and let the traitors be together till death did them apart. Thanks to Hire-a-Killer, I can finally move on with my life again!
    -Mary G., California
    [​IMG]
    I'm in a business that requires a lot of "waste management", so I knew I needed a reliable partner to take care of things for me. H.A.K. gave me a bulk discount and has never been anything less than perfect. Really the top in the field!
    - Tony S., New Jersey
    [​IMG]
    Our parents didn't approve of our lifestyle, so we killed them and moved to Philadelphia where we live happily together. Thanks H.A.K.!
    - Travis & Ashton, Pennsylvania
    [​IMG]
    My kids were pressuring me about my will and would talk about what they would do with the money in front of me. So I called Hire-a-Killer and had them killed in a tragic accident. I used the money from their life insurance to go on a cruise! Thanks H.A.K.!
    - Susan K., Florida
    [​IMG]
    Several years ago this famous West Coast rapper was stealing my beats and wouldn't give me any credit. So I contacted Hire-a-Killer and had the thief whacked. Now nobody messes with my s&*#!
    - Chris W., New York
    [​IMG]
    My teaching assistant gave me a bad grade, even after I paid for the keg at her party and made out with her to boot. I felt betrayed and abandoned. I feel much better now that she's six feet under my porch. Thank you H.A.K. for protecting my GPA!
    - Sara T., Southern Illinois University ​
  15.  
    ......

    ...... Well-Known Member

    lol I wonder how many dumbasses they scamed with it
  16.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    [​IMG]
    Several years ago this famous West Coast rapper was stealing my beats and wouldn't give me any credit. So I contacted Hire-a-Killer and had the thief whacked. Now nobody messes with my s&*#!

    Best one!
  17.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    Guy killed pac! They sell killers but cant say the word "shit" on their website!
  18.  
    ......

    ...... Well-Known Member

    The best part
    [​IMG]
    Our team of expert killers is here to provide you with quality service. All of our employees have been trained by the most respected gurus in the industry and have many years of experience in the field of contract killing. To protect their identity and ensure reliable service for our customers, Hire-a-Killer uses silhouetted faces and professional pseudonyms.
    [​IMG] Mr. X
    - Former Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps
    - Master of five styles of Martial Arts including Ju Jitsu, Krav Maga, Aikido, Capoeira and Tae Kwon Do
    - "By the books" professional style
    [​IMG] Cobra Killer
    - Former Harvard Law professor
    - Expansive knowledge of untracable poisonous substances and unique weapons
    - Assignments carried out with grace and class
    [​IMG] Agent Orange
    - Self-trained for over 30 years
    - Expert knowledge in all types of automatic and semi-automatic weapons and explosives
    - Quick and precise
    [​IMG]
    Angel of Death
    - Art school drop-out
    - Master of sword and knife fighting
    - Avant Garde style dubbed her the "creative queen of killing"
  19.  
    tebor

    tebor Well-Known Member

    What the hell were you googling to find that site?
  20.  
    JN811

    JN811 Well-Known Member

    lmfao that shit is too good. Sounds like characters from a poorly written script. I was stoned and just curious what would pop up if I typed in "hire hitman." It has the #1 spot!

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