Hey old farts..how many over 50 yrs?

Fubard

Well-Known Member
I'm a devout atheist, never believed in God or the supernatural even as a kid. Its all random so there is no one to ask why.
I love organised religion, it doesn't take much "research" to have them bamboozled by asking them questions that they cannot answer because it means their version of belief gets shredded.

The Book of Leviticus is a cracker for when you get accosted by the bible bashers, you can really screw with their heads.

Or, may favourite, "I stopped talking to imaginary friends when I was 6 years old, what's your excuse".

Of note is that such things are only done when a polite "Not interested" followed by a not-so-polite "Fuck off" is not a hint they understand. Believe what you wish, that is your choice, but don't try to force me into believing your fantasies or you will not come off best, "live and let live" you could say....
 

jonsnow399

Well-Known Member
I love organised religion, it doesn't take much "research" to have them bamboozled by asking them questions that they cannot answer because it means their version of belief gets shredded.

The Book of Leviticus is a cracker for when you get accosted by the bible bashers, you can really screw with their heads.

Or, may favourite, "I stopped talking to imaginary friends when I was 6 years old, what's your excuse".

Of note is that such things are only done when a polite "Not interested" followed by a not-so-polite "Fuck off" is not a hint they understand. Believe what you wish, that is your choice, but don't try to force me into believing your fantasies or you will not come off best, "live and let live" you could say....
I mentioned in another post that two Mormon missionaries came to the house the other day. I let them in because they were hot chicks and I wanted to screw with their head. Among other things they said "I never thought about that!" . They left crying! I think partly cause I shook their beliefs or maybe because they figured I'm Hell-bound. LOL:fire:
 

Fubard

Well-Known Member
I mentioned in another post that two Mormon missionaries came to the house the other day. I let them in because they were hot chicks and I wanted to screw with their head. Among other things they said "I never thought about that!" . They left crying! I think partly cause I shook their beliefs or maybe because they figured I'm Hell-bound. LOL:fire:
Hell no, you made the mistake of saving their souls because of "misbelieving" so you're going to heaven with the Mormons

I answered the door to some "Witnesses" when wearing a t-shirt covered in blood and with a cleaver in my hand, I'd bought a LOAD of meat and was cutting it up to go into the freezer, and told them that the dog I had would never chew my shoes again. They called the police. Police laughed and that meant I'm heading to the place where we find the beer and hookers, and I have an entire floor reserved for me so I have some space for the like-minded to join me.
 

Fubard

Well-Known Member
i just give them a curt no and close the door in their faces when they come around here. actually, they've only come twice in 10 years, guess i'm not worth the walk up the big hill
No fun in that, they made the effort to get there so the least you can do is invite them in to rest their weary legs.

And then rip their "ideals" apart for daring to try and preach their ideals to you...
 

Roger A. Shrubber

Well-Known Member
i just don't have the time to waste on those people. i've got way better things to do....pick my nose....scratch my ass...water the plants...
the best "revenge" is them having to turn around and walk back down on their tired legs

(i wash my hands between the scratching my ass part and the watering the plants part...)
 

HolyGhost23

Well-Known Member
well im only 30 but i feel like im 50. ive done a lot of shit that most people have not..from killing people in war. to taking shits in a hole in the floor
 

jonsnow399

Well-Known Member
Hell no, you made the mistake of saving their souls because of "misbelieving" so you're going to heaven with the Mormons

I answered the door to some "Witnesses" when wearing a t-shirt covered in blood and with a cleaver in my hand, I'd bought a LOAD of meat and was cutting it up to go into the freezer, and told them that the dog I had would never chew my shoes again. They called the police. Police laughed and that meant I'm heading to the place where we find the beer and hookers, and I have an entire floor reserved for me so I have some space for the like-minded to join me.
I'm going straight to Hell,
Ain't nothing slowing me down,
I'm going straight to Hell,
So serve me up a drink and I'll shoot it right down,
Then I'll jump on the bar and holler "One more round"
 

jonsnow399

Well-Known Member
i just don't have the time to waste on those people. i've got way better things to do....pick my nose....scratch my ass...water the plants...
the best "revenge" is them having to turn around and walk back down on their tired legs

(i wash my hands between the scratching my ass part and the watering the plants part...)
I used to work third shift and a couple Jehovah's Witness's knocked on the door and woke me up. They said The Lord told us to come here and talk to you. I looked at them and said " The son of a bitch should have told you I work third shift and and was sleeping!" then I slammed the door in their face.:cuss:
 

Fubard

Well-Known Member
I'm going straight to Hell,
Ain't nothing slowing me down,
I'm going straight to Hell,
So serve me up a drink and I'll shoot it right down,
Then I'll jump on the bar and holler "One more round"
Son, you have the songs but I have the reservation. ACDC may have sung about the Highway to Hell, but I built it

Space is dropping, but I'll still find room for you
 

jonsnow399

Well-Known Member
Yep so true.
Yesterday I was checking for the expiration date stamped on my ass when I was born. Only could find the Best by date and Made in USA, Ha :bigjoint:

I'm way past the Best by date. LOL

It's a mystery I'm still here. :P
If I had been born 100 years ago I would have been dead at 50. 10 years ago I was becoming tired very easily and out of breath just doing light work. It was July and 95 degrees but I had to put a sweater on. The wife noticed I was losing weight although I was eating plenty. I figured it was just some bug or something. She made me go to the emergency room and they acted like it was no big deal until they ran some tests. When they came back they told me they were admitting me as soon as a room was ready. I said "I'll go home and take care of a few things and come back in the morning. They said if you leave you might not make it back. "You have so little blood in you, that you can have a heart attack at any moment". They admitted me and I asked what was wrong. They said they didn't know until the test were complete but it could be leukemia or bone cancer. Shit! I had to wait til the next day and the doc said "Good news, it isn't leukemia!" Then I said " So that means bone cancer?" "We will find out tomorrow". Turns out it was pernicious anemia and the cure was b12 shots. The morons had me freaking out for two days and never mentioned it could be something so simple.
I was watching an episode of Downton abby and one of the characters had the same symptoms I had and was waiting to hear if it was pernicious anemia. If it was, it was a death sentence at that time. It would have been a slow, terrible death, just wasting away.
 

Ringsixty

Well-Known Member
If I had been born 100 years ago I would have been dead at 50. 10 years ago I was becoming tired very easily and out of breath just doing light work. It was July and 95 degrees but I had to put a sweater on. The wife noticed I was losing weight although I was eating plenty. I figured it was just some bug or something. She made me go to the emergency room and they acted like it was no big deal until they ran some tests. When they came back they told me they were admitting me as soon as a room was ready. I said "I'll go home and take care of a few things and come back in the morning. They said if you leave you might not make it back. "You have so little blood in you, that you can have a heart attack at any moment". They admitted me and I asked what was wrong. They said they didn't know until the test were complete but it could be leukemia or bone cancer. Shit! I had to wait til the next day and the doc said "Good news, it isn't leukemia!" Then I said " So that means bone cancer?" "We will find out tomorrow". Turns out it was pernicious anemia and the cure was b12 shots. The morons had me freaking out for two days and never mentioned it could be something so simple.
I was watching an episode of Downton abby and one of the characters had the same symptoms I had and was waiting to hear if it was pernicious anemia. If it was, it was a death sentence at that time. It would have been a slow, terrible death, just wasting away.
Best wishes for good health:bigjoint:
 

zeddd

Well-Known Member
If I had been born 100 years ago I would have been dead at 50. 10 years ago I was becoming tired very easily and out of breath just doing light work. It was July and 95 degrees but I had to put a sweater on. The wife noticed I was losing weight although I was eating plenty. I figured it was just some bug or something. She made me go to the emergency room and they acted like it was no big deal until they ran some tests. When they came back they told me they were admitting me as soon as a room was ready. I said "I'll go home and take care of a few things and come back in the morning. They said if you leave you might not make it back. "You have so little blood in you, that you can have a heart attack at any moment". They admitted me and I asked what was wrong. They said they didn't know until the test were complete but it could be leukemia or bone cancer. Shit! I had to wait til the next day and the doc said "Good news, it isn't leukemia!" Then I said " So that means bone cancer?" "We will find out tomorrow". Turns out it was pernicious anemia and the cure was b12 shots. The morons had me freaking out for two days and never mentioned it could be something so simple.
I was watching an episode of Downton abby and one of the characters had the same symptoms I had and was waiting to hear if it was pernicious anemia. If it was, it was a death sentence at that time. It would have been a slow, terrible death, just wasting away.
I was gunna say get B12 in ya
 
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