I dont even get the stupidness of this joke...

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Sippin codeine cause i gotta killa cough

aw man you answered my joke, let me answer too.... about 6 pounds hahahahahaha

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In the quest for the test to fulfill an achievement, everybody's only loaded just to shoot themselves, when the fact of the matter is they just don't care, to extend a helping hand to anyone else

Cannabis is perfectly healthy and good for you...unless there's a cop or a fed with a weapon and an attitude.

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Wouldn't it be great if it wasn't colder? Then we wouldn't have to wait so long, and wouldn't it be nice to be high forever in the kind of world where we belong?

thers a scorpian over near the river nile in egypt and he wants tocross the river so he asks a friendly lookin frog if he can get a lift across the river on his back the frog reply's "well friend i would gladly give u a lift across the river but u will sting me in the back and i shall die" so the scorpian says back to the frog "that would be terribly stupid of me from i need to get to the other side andif i did sting u on the way across i would also die because i cant swim" so the frog sits back and has a think about this. After awhile the frog decides to give the scorpian a lift across the river about halfway across the river the scopian stings the frog many times, the frog turnsaround nsays u bastard why did u do that now we will both surley die the scorpian reply's "welcome to the middle east bitch"

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"Animals Are Beasts, But Men Are Monsters" ~ Facing the Terror Within

now that my friends, is classic.

hey how come them jahova witnesses always show up when i'm either working or blasted and or both.i try to get them helpin me out and they usually do.just yesterday i was baked so i ended up hooking the dude up with a miringa tree.it turned out i worked with the dude at some point.but i always offer them beer cigarettes joints and ask them if their hungry.i guess they get hip to my bored plight and eventually firgure i'm hopeless and go about their merry way speading the joy. when i first encountered them i thought for there is a pitch or scam gonna happen.but sho nuff they just wanted to leave some litterature and spead the word. hey once a really sexy one starts bangin on my door and at first i thought i died and went to heaven.i took a better look and dicided she was under age, a narc or a transvestite so i put my clothes back on.and got real quiet for awhile til she went away.turned out she was a neighbor that lived close by and she was only 13.well thats just freaky.my first incounter with the witnesses.

4 Little stoners sat in a tree S-M-O-K-I-N-G First comes the toke then comes the weez then comes visions of toast and cheese.

Boudreaux passed the regionals and made it to a poetry contest. His competitor was a Harvard professor.

They were to compose a poem with "timbuktu".

Boudreaux thought "Meh, wat da hell is dat?"

He replied with,

"On through the bayou me and Tim went
until we came upon a nylon tent
In that tent three hookers we knew
I bucked one and Timbuktu"

And this one confuses alot of smokers. Many times my friends are still sitting there waiting for the punch line:

A guy walked into a bar and said, "Owww"

The Power of a Badge.....













DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas , and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay , but do not go in that field over there," as he points out the location.














The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? "














The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.





A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......









With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....




" Your badge. Show him your BADGE ! "