Friend with a bag of shwag. We smoke some, and it is no good. =[ It tasted horrible and was just nooo good.

A little later im like dude..lets smoke a lil more, and my friend goes, "Nah man! I dont wanna smoke anymore of that squash!" He ment shwag..but oh man it was funny.

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whats it smell like? Smells like Crizzab to me.

Aly: Where the fuck did you go?
Nate: I've been sitting here the whole time.
Aly: Oh...

[While We're All Talking]
Hailey: Wow, that was an awkward silence. (She was serious...)

Nate: Fucking tree kicked me off!

Matt: What the fuck are you doing?
Serena: This ketchup tastes fucking awesome...

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There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting. -Gautama Buddha

"I just realized Jasmine and Aladin are Indian"
"Wow, I just Realized Mulan is asian"

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after seeing a commercial where 2 hot chicks are eating whipped cream:
roommate: "I wish I could find two chicks with whipped cream...(5 second pause) 'cause I'm hungry."

Alyssa: Where the fuck did the pile we just broke up go?
Peter: We smoked it...about an hour ago.

[In a car]
Josh: Watch the fuckin' road! Jesus Christ Maddie, are you drunk?
Maddie: A lil bit. (somehow she managed to slur that)
Josh: Fuck it, pull over, I'm driving!
Maddie: But you're stoned! (again...SLURRED)
Josh: Oh fucking well, it's better than you.
[Pulls over]
[5 mins. later]
Me: Watch the fucking road, Josh!
[Josh pulls over two lanes going 50 mph and screech stops about and inch from a ditch]
Josh: Are any of you whiney bitches sober?
...
Josh: Exactley!
[Guns it]

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There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting. -Gautama Buddha

"no we're not smoking out of this" - me, refering to my pellet gun

5 min later

"I love how the gun that we were using to play the last video game (AWW MAN WHAT THE FUCK!?) exploded" - friend with me in the background, he melted the plastic around the metal barrel while people were smoking out of it.

i have an hour and a half long raw copy of the radio show from that night if anyone wants it

1st time high at work...."man this ho ho taste so gooooood"
or newyears 08 stoned and drunk last ones at the party i go man look at that keg...i think we should put it in a cooler... the keg was emptied into the cooler and ended up in my fridge in coke bottles still fresh 2 days later

my mate iain while severely fucked ha:

"i wouldn't care if my parents died... as long as it was sunny"
was pretty funny at time

i cant remember some other things
we were blowing smoke into bubble through those weird bubble blower tings and frank decided how to measure how good you were:

"people are measured on how big there bubbles are, if there small there a nobody, but if there big they can rule the world"

that was proper funny too haha

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everyday blud

www.myspace.com/rich_owns

was smoking with some people I don't usually smoke with and they were passing the bong to the right. me and my friends always pass to the left. I was so fucked up that every time i hit it I would just pass it right back to john who was on my left

John: Would you stop trying to pass the fucking bong left
Me: I don't usually talk about this but....I'm not an ambipasser. It's a problem I've had since I was a kid. I can't pass right

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Drugs are an amazing thing they taught an entire generation of Americans the metric system

After smoking hella.

me:"Wow everything is so Opek"
Friend:"wtf does Opek mean?"
me:"I dont know I think it means transparent"
Friend:"Wanna go lazer pen houses?"

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