i guess i forgot to mention i dont have any kids but someday thats what ill say, still a little young for kids.

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man i was with my cousin the weird thing is we only smoked 5 bowls but man i was to stoned i couldn't see straight so i laid down and he was just laughing his ass off and i was trippin any ways he had grabbed my skin on my elbow and i thought my skin was being ripped off so after all that happened he said that he felt like he was throwing metal snowballs at ducks man i wish i could get that stoned again.

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one is the number and two is the one George Jung

the first thing they will do is tell their friends

you sure thats a good idea?

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honey, i forgot to duck

I had this friend who will chatter and chatter endlessly about her life and past times she got high. Which is cool I just mellow out and listen most of the time.

However one day it seemed as though she'd wait until she got her hands on the joint to start talking.

So I yelled at her "Kayla shut the fuck up, shut it the fuck up, sit down, chill out, and smoke some weed stop telling your god damned stories"

Which doesn't sound funny but I never ever show any kind of argumentative nature or anything like that. She was in shock and everybody started laughing.

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Đσ ωнατ τнough ωίll aиđ наям иоиє.

Damn I got a few of these.. my bud was drivin, pulls out of our lil' party house and falls asleep.. wakes up yelling "AM I AT MY HOUSE YET!?!?!" heh.. then he starts driving normal gets to a fork in the road and goes straight for the sign (in the middle) and drives off of the road.. again he wakes up yelling about being back at his house, funny shit, he had to replace the driver.

alright so was my second time ever smoking ganja and the first time i had smoked it out of a little 1 hitter cig piece thing and only a couple so i barely got a buzz but was kindve just calm. i told my one friend about it and he was having a really rough week in school (this was 8th grade) so he said fuck it lets smoke some weed this weekend and chill out ya know just remove the stress.... So i talked with my one friend who was 18 and told him i could toss him some $ to smoke me and my friend up, he told me to come down on saturday and hed have a suprise for us. When my friend and i got down there he pulled out an 8th of nice headies and then told us to close our eyes. when we opened them there was a 18' bong sitting on the table that he had just bought and said that it was time to break it in. me and my 2 friends sat there and smoked the whole 8th just packing the bong and passing it around, now mind you id never been really high before and neither had my one friend so as you know the first time it takes a long time to kick in. when we really started to feel it we got a massive munchie attack and decided that we absolutely had to go get some pizza. we walked about 50 yards down the block which took forever and finally made it to this pizza shop we always chill at. i remember we walked in high as fucking kites and the guys who own the shop knew it so we sat down in the back right corner of the shop and both got cheesesteaks. while we were sitting there a couple of people came in to order food and my friend and i were both so fucking high that we just kept laughing at them and telling each other there was no way in hell we looked even close to sober and i just remember sitting there stuffing a cheesesteak in my mouth laughing at how ridiculously high we were... good times

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Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow.Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free,Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands,With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves,Let me forget about today until tomorrow.

I almost just shit my pants! Are you kidding that doesn't sound funny? That is a fucking riot!

i got a good story ever though its not a first time. me and my girl are driving back to my house from just picking up 8 rolls and a quarter of some dank. so were driving and smoking bowl after bowl hot boxin my car like a mothafucka. and my dumb ass has to pull some stupid shit. were at a red light and i realize i have to turn left. so light turns green and i turn left from the straight lane. and being in miami we have alot of undercover cops. so just my luck i had turned in front of one of them in a dodge magnum. the car pulls up next to me and it had blacked out tints so i couldent see it was cops, and they start fuckin racing me. so were hauling ass down the road and out of nowhere they slam they brakes and get behind me and then i hear the sirens and see the fukin lights and im thinking great im going to jail today. so i pull over and two cops come to the passenger door and of course we roll the window down and smoke billows out of the car like cheech and chong. the cop is like wtf is wrong with you are you stupid or something and i just stay quiet. so they open the door and they see my girl still holding the packed bowl in her hand and the cop just says give me that. he takes the bowl and slams that shit on the street and says get the fuck out of here i never want to see you again. and i was just fuckin amazed at what just happend. in the end we lost a $60 glow in the dark bowl, but i got away with my 8 rolls, the rest of my weed, and best of all my freedom. after i got home i proceeded to rip the bong until i stopped thinkin about it.

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http://www.rollitup.org/outdoor-grow...or-2009-a.html
C20H25N3O -chemical formula for fun. C12H16N2 -formula for exploration.

I was tokin' with my buddies in a friends backyard (He was out of town at the time and was opposed to smoking. He has since come over to greener pastures.) at about 1:00am in the middle of winter and we got so fucking blazed. We were walking back to my house and we came to this hill and we started walking up it. and we kept walking and walking and walking. It felt like it took an hour to walk up this hill that was about half a block long. When we got to the top my friend who had smoked for the first time that night looks at me with a blank stare and just says, "Holy Shit." Then we all just cracked up, standing in the middle of the street.
I had another one where we were making Taquitos in the microwave and my brother runs upstairs to take a shit. After he is gone for about 30 seconds, we all forget where he is. The three of us in the kitchen all go outside and look for him and then search the house for hat seems like thirty minutes and as we are yelling his name we are all like, "Shit! The taquitos!" We all run back to the kitchen and see that it has been one minute and thirty-two seconds since we noticed my bro was gone and we still have 46 seconds left on the taquitos. Then he comes back from his shit and we're like, "dude, where were you?" and he is like, "I dunno, I decided I didn't have to shit so I just sat on the toilet for like an hour."

Those were the days.

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"I do not consent to any searches."

shiiit i get my mom stoned off her ass all the time. so its the other way around for me lol