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Be well

There are certain strains of weed that have a powerful calming effect that also help depression. I believe the "Strawberry Cough" strain is one of the best for that sort of thing. Research strains, chances are you'll find one to fit your needs.

Xanax can be good for temporary relief of stress an anxiety, but taking it for long periods of time can create a horrible dependency on it. There's a reason doctor's don't like to prescribe it, it's highly addictive and has a lot of "potential abuse" qualities. If you can, I'd recommend getting off the Xanax as soon as possible.

I'd recommend finding a therapist to talk to. The VA would definitely help you there. While it's tempting to control your symptoms with pills, I think talking out your demons would help. That's just my two cents, just a suggestion. It's hard to talk about shit, especially horrendous and life-altering shit, but if you don't talk about it it eats your insides. If you DO go to a therapist, be open and up front about your marijuana use. You'd be surprised. Make sure you're going to a THERAPIST and not a PSYCHIATRIST. The psych'll dope you up so fast ...

Weed is a wonderful thing, and I hope it's helping you. It's certainly better for you (mentally and physically) than the Xanax. Just hang in there, that's all any of us can do.

I know what anxiety is like...I barely leave my house because of it. I'm telling you what worked for me...herbs, and visualization. For a long time I controlled my mind by getting into a meditative state, envisioning my brain and the anxiety and depression as darkness engulfing it. I would use a white light as a purifier and push it out of my brain. You'd be surprised at the resistance you feel. I did this over and over until things were "clean" and then i washed it in blue light to heal. Yes, it probably sounds like a bunch of new age bullshit, but it kept my dad's leukemia in remission for 15 years. You can do anything with your mind...you just have to train it.

While I agree with your post, I'd like to interject that for some such as myself, therapy is not the way to go. I hate having my head picked, and I'm stubborn as all get out. I want to rely on myself....must be a childhood thing but I hate to be weak. And I believe that your mind is the master control to your body...a lot can be done with it, in terms of healing. However, I dont recommend telling therapists about marijuana use. Theyre not your friend...theyre your therapist...and if for any reason your medical records are subpoenaed, well, there ya go.

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I'm a woman! Not a dude! And! This is a fantasy role playing site! I'm a level two plant slayer!

I have a lot of questions for you, but I need to get showered up. I am STUNNED at the number and types of meds your doc has had you on. Just STUNNED.

Curious, first, what are your diagnoses? Are you prepared to reintroduce any meds if the weed doesn't help you as you'd hoped?

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Ron Paul doesn't deliver babies.
He reads them the Bill of Rights until they crawl their way to freedom!

I was diagnosed with depression and general anxiety disorder. My major problem then (and even now) is motivation. Getting myself to do anything for any reason was hard, and whenever I expressed this they'd either increase my dose or put me on a new med.

I remember the exact moment I got fed up with the pills. I was about to take them and I counted the number of pills in my hand and realized that they were not the path to better health. My current doctor said my last doctor was "irresponsible" for putting me on those meds. It's scary, as you're supposed to trust these people with your lives but I wonder sometimes ... do they even care?

If my depression and anxiety come back with a vengence (read: get to a point where I can't manage on my own), I've conceded to trying something else. But, if I have my way, I'll kiss the pills goodbye forever.

That IS true ... there isn't one thing that's a cure-all for everyone. If there was, nobody'd be depressed anymore. It's good to try different things.

I'm not sure if therapy records count as a medical record, as therapists (once again NOT PSYCHIATRISTS) don't have a license to practice medicine. Some psychs act as therapists as well, but I mean the kind that don't have a PhD at the end of their name.

Visualization and meditation have helped me loads, it's about conditioning your mind to think in a different way. Positive thinking is ALWAYS a good thing!

Hm....then if theyre not a doctor technically...are they bound by the same confidentiality agreement?

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I'm a woman! Not a dude! And! This is a fantasy role playing site! I'm a level two plant slayer!

YEs, Mental health practicioners at all level are bound by confidentiality agreements

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This is a test, just keep on going. Don't worry. We'll get it right. We've done this before.

I really have only one suggestion.
Maybe you guys are already into it. But I'm just trying to help, so here ya go!
This is directed to anyone felling even remotely depressed, or curious.
The advice is to read some books, and actually practice the stuff in them.

A overview of the these books: Stuff that is absent from mainstream culture, but is vital to happiness as well as balance.

Mantak Chia
Awaken Healing Energy Through the Tao
Healing Love Through the Tao: Cultivating Female Sexual Energy
Taoist Secrets of Love: Cultivating Male Sexual Energy
Transforming Stress Into Vitality

Anything by Stewart Swerdlow....
-Blue Blood, True Blood: Conflict and Creation
-The True Reality of Sexuality
-Journey Into Hyperspace

Sangra Ingerman
Shamanic Journeying

Everyone just is in search of Energy...High Energy is happiness, energy leaks lead into depression. Leaks can be physical or metaphysical or psychic... These books will help to seal the leaks. We as humans do not need to search outside ourself for energy source, But when we deplete our energy... usually we have no other choice but to seek EXTERNAL ENERGY. So Either you don't know that you have a inextinguishable INTERNAL ENERGY supply, or you think it is too difficult to achieve. It really comes down to the point of... ARE YOU ACTUALLY READY TO FEEL GOOD AND HAPPY? Or do you still want to keep digging deeper. You cant know peace until you have had suffering.

Again, I can't help you. I can only help you help yourself.
=D Enjoy, Any questions, Ask!

Edit:
As far as the energy stuff goes, when looking at the Two Sexes, Practices really break down into the individual sex at first.
However, Once the energy leaks are sealed it becomes very general, and the two sexes are generally the same.

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that font hurts my brain =|

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