To each his own, phew.

medicineman · #1 02-03-2008, 12:39 PM

2008 Presidential Candidates -- A Test of Character

Which characteristics make an ideal President? Honesty under fire? The ability to skirt controversy? Staring an issue in the face and not flinching under pressure?
Knowing how someone responds to unexpected crisis is important. Surprises happen, and what someone does with a surprise can define and show who they really are. For example, George W. Bush responding to 9/11.
Which of the following characteristics do YOU want in the next US leader?

The Candidates and Their Tendencies

John McCain - Rrrrrrrrrrrriiiiip!! (<-- Click to hear it!!!)

(Shows unabashed support of the current situation and the current administration's policies, regardless of how disgusting they are.)

Rudy Giuliani - Silent but deadly.

(Thought he could slip into the Presidency unnoticed, but now the wafting stink around his anti-intellectualism begins to suffocate.)

Ron Paul - Doesn't actually fart. (It isn't in the constitution.)
(Nor does he actually have a chance - at least not according to the mainstream media)

Hillary Clinton - Ladies don't fart! It must be Bill's fault.
(Its just so easy to live in Bill's shadow. Everything happens because of Bill, or its his fault. Including her popularity.)

Dennis Kucinich - "I may have a hot wife, but sometimes the sizzle isn't worth it!" (<-- Click to hear a hot chick fart!!)
(He may have a hot wife, but is that the most important reason to elect a guy as President?)

Mike Huckabee - Th-Thug-A-Thug-A-SSPLUUUUG (<-- Click it!)
Girl: OMG, I think he sh*t his pants!
Mike: What the shart?!
Bill: I'd get those stains taken out of the fabric right away if I were you!

(Trying so hard to become a "real candidate" he's pushing as hard as possible. Possibly too hard.)

Mitt Romney - "As long as I blow it outside, no-one (not even Joseph Smith) can tell that its me. Hey, look at that nice mountain. "
(As long as he keeps avoiding the major issues and rebutting his opponents, he might even get elected because no-one's sure what he stands for or who else to vote for.)

Barack Obama - " (I'll just blame it on this cow...)" (<-- Click to hear the, uh, cow!!) "Hi everyone, look at my black outfit!"

(Hey, he may have a good idea from time to time. But honestly, who doesn't think its finally time to have a non-white President?)

And After The Election Is Over...

...in just a few short months, one of these candidates will actually become President. Along with their odd, well-evidenced character and patterns of being.
And on that spectacular day, the new President will be able to fart in triumphant celebration (<-- click to hear it!!!), knowing that they somehow managed to get elected anyway!!