Piss test within 7 days, I choose private company and date. Fake piss help

daisy2687

Well-Known Member
I'll keep it short. Just looking for good info here on fake piss or people who have used private drug testers in the past.

I have to take this test for a program I'm in which is connected to my probation. Probation said they cant drug test me so now the owner of the program is on a vendetta against me. He's requiring me to get a test or kick me out (which in turns means I violate my probation)

He made it easy (I hope) though. He doesnt do his own testing so I have to go out and pay for a test and show him the results. This means I can choose any company and of course, I'm using fake piss..

Do they always follow you in to the bathroom? Should I call and straight up ask the company if they do or not? Ya know.. I have a peeing phobia.. ya know..

Anyone with experience doing this? (getting your own DT done and showing whoever the results). I will of course administer the usual remedy of water water water niacin, incase all goes to hell.
 

goten

Well-Known Member
as long as they dont go in the bathroom witcha your good...

BUUUTTT.. if they do...your s.o.l bro.....

i dont know anyone who can clean themselfs out in 7- days...:peace:
 

daisy2687

Well-Known Member
I know I'm not gettin clean... I'm tryin to find the best way so they dont watch me.. Since I can choose where I go I'm hoping theres some kind of chance
 

goten

Well-Known Member
put some clean piss in a condom..

put a safty pin or something on your tighty whiteys...'' not boxers ''

have that condom right under your ball sac..

have your back to them of course

take that pin and poke alittle hole in it..

squezz the piss through the condom so it will sound like a little stream..

when your done , keep the pissy condom in your undies..

you can shower and change when you get home....
 

Pipe Dream

Well-Known Member
well in general when you go to take a drug test at a lab or something for a job they will not watch you. However if your taking a UA for probation it's totally different. By altering or using fake piss it's a crime and that's a violation of your probation. If you drop a positive UA and that's also a crime and a violation of your probation. I would be as safe as possible and cover all my bases so that in the future any UA could be passed even if they watch you. I think whizzinator went out of business and got charges pressed against them or something. Now i have seen similar products but they are sold as adult sex toys that just have the ability to "urinate". Maybe ask your local sex shop if they know anything about them or perhaps order something online and get it expressed to you or something with some synthetic urines. Often there is just enough so having extra is a good idea. I'm not telling you to break the law but that's how I would do it if I did it.:mrgreen: When I was on probation I had random UAs had to suck it up and quit for 2 years.
 

Prot3us1`

Active Member
Just dont squeeze our lgs together and pop the balloon... "shit sorry dude i suffer from premature urination, sometimes i get real excited before a deposit and just blow my load"...

sorry stoned haha

prot

also, most of the thc metabolites are excreted through solid waste rather than urine...make sure you eat your fibre for the next week..you will have a % of the thc in your system in your urine. If you intake really simple, no preservative foods your body will be able to get rid of more thc each day. So while your drinking regimen is keeping thc from sitting in your bladder or kidneys, the fibres getting rid of total saturation...

prot
 

goten

Well-Known Member
Just dont squeeze our lgs together and pop the balloon... "shit sorry dude i suffer from premature urination, sometimes i get real excited before a deposit and just blow my load"...

sorry stoned haha

prot

also, most of the thc metabolites are excreted through solid waste rather than urine...make sure you eat your fibre for the next week..you will have a % of the thc in your system in your urine. If you intake really simple, no preservative foods your body will be able to get rid of more thc each day. So while your drinking regimen is keeping thc from sitting in your bladder or kidneys, the fibres getting rid of total saturation...

prot

condom....not ballon

condoms can handle more pressure....:hump:
 

daisy2687

Well-Known Member
well in general when you go to take a drug test at a lab or something for a job they will not watch you. However if your taking a UA for probation it's totally different. By altering or using fake piss it's a crime and that's a violation of your probation. If you drop a positive UA and that's also a crime and a violation of your probation. I would be as safe as possible and cover all my bases so that in the future any UA could be passed even if they watch you. I think whizzinator went out of business and got charges pressed against them or something. Now i have seen similar products but they are sold as adult sex toys that just have the ability to "urinate". Maybe ask your local sex shop if they know anything about them or perhaps order something online and get it expressed to you or something with some synthetic urines. Often there is just enough so having extra is a good idea. I'm not telling you to break the law but that's how I would do it if I did it.:mrgreen: When I was on probation I had random UAs had to suck it up and quit for 2 years.
Good news is, it's not for probation, nor by probation. It will be done by a private company that I go in to and pay $35 for a drug test faxed to my 'counselor' guy.
 

daisy2687

Well-Known Member
dude. www.testclear.com order one of their "purine" kits. works every time. gotto labcorp - they area a nationwide company, they wont follow you in.
Have you been to labcorp before? I have one literally 6 blocks down the street I just realized.

My headshop has well reviewed fake piss so I think I'm good there (even have friend who used one with success)...
 

woobystein

Active Member
Yea man fake piss is the way to go if you dont have some bastard staring at your pork sword. I just went to a local smoke shop and paid about 30 bucks for a small flask of synthetic urine that you can keep in some compression shorts or some other tight undies when you go in the room to drain your lizard. Shit worked like a charm and the next bowl i smoked was especially delightful with my feeling of triumph over beating the system. good luck!
 

daisy2687

Well-Known Member
I guess for anyone wondering I used QuickFix 5.7, the test was unsupervised (I got to order the test myself), specimen at 96 degrees. Passed.

Love beatin the system
 
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