Thread: Gypsy's Picture Depot
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Old 07-04-2009, 06:49 PM
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GypsyBush
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a few quotes I really like...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Al B. Fuct View Post

There's absolutely no sin in being a noob grower. It's totally OK to be a noob! In fact, there's a lot worse to be encountered by those who really are noobs but who think they're w33d b4R0nz.

Everyone is a noob once. It's much better to know you're a noob and learn how to find and apply good information than to think you know what's going on or try to guess your way through using old wives' tales and rumours.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Al B. Fuct View Post

The most frustrating posts to deal with ...

Newbie posts incredibly broad queries like "OK, I want poundage, how do I grow plants? What is soil? Why can't I use halogen motorcycle fog lights to grow poundage?! WHY AREN'T YOU LAZY FUCKIN' BASTARDS ANSWERING MY QUESTIONS, AREN'T YOU HERE TO SERVE ME?!"

Newbies who KNOW they are already weed barons, by virtue of reading a 35 year old growbook, who then go on to enthusiastically offer incredibly bad advice to the newer newbies, leaving the whole schlemozzle to be cleaned up by the REALLY knowledgeable crew, only for the really experienced posters to be told by the somewhat-new-newbies that the advice they've just given is TOTALLY WRONG cos it doesn't match what was said in the 35 year old grow book.

Anyone got any spare birth control pills to feminise my plants?

this next one from... How not to grow dope


Quote:
Originally Posted by Al B. Fuct View Post
  1. Decide while stoned to become a weed baron
  2. Plant leftover bagseeds and go looking for lights
  3. Try to steal neighbor's floodlights, burn fingers, go to plan B after healing up
  4. Buy incandescent halogen lights at OfficeJerks cos they look real bright and one blacklight over at the head shop cos it's purpleyness is cool as fuck and makes the Jimi Hendrix velvet poster glow something wicked
  5. 4 out of 72 seeds sprout, fuckin ace!
  6. All 4 get stretchy, fall over and die
  7. Put the black light a little closer to cheer it up
  8. Smoked the dried out seedling, gave me a headache, so I planted some more bagseeds
  9. Dug out Uncle Bob's marijuana grow book from 1972, marveled at nail-thru-stem technique for improving potency
  10. 9 out of 147 sprout, fuckin ace!
  11. Put a pound of nails in salty water to get em good and rusty
  12. All 9 get stretchy, fall over and die
  13. I figured they wasn't getting enough light, so I stole granny's big ole heat lamp and a couple of headlights from some passing cars (damn they're hard to grab at stoplights)
  14. Planted more seeds, put more bullshit and a couple of dead fish in soil mix this time (hey it worked for the Indians and the Pilgrims)
  15. Neighbours complained about the shitty fish smell, I told them to rack off, so they called the cops, who confiscated all the 'evidence.'
  16. Saw story on Fox News about wicked intarwebs sites about marijuana growing warping kids brains, figured I wasn't warped enough
  17. Found pot growing website, figured I'd do a big favor for all those newbie idiots who'd never planted a seed and show em how to do it
  18. Typed Uncle Bob's entire 1972 Yippie Underground growbook into the pot growing website, waited for praises to flow in
  19. No one said nothing, so I typed it in again IN ALL CAPS SO THEY COULD READ IT BETTER
  20. Decided I'd hang around and learn something, there's this guy who says his friend's uncle's brother in law once knew a guy who grew like POUNDAGE in an old refrigerator
  21. Stole a refrigerator and put all my halogen lights in it along with a 5000 watt security light I found on top of a football stadium
  22. Planted 693 more seeds in old coconut shells and put a half a box of Miracle Gro granules on each one
  23. One sprouted and it screamed at me to kill it before it had to spend another second in that damn fridge
  24. Gave up tryin to be a weed baron
  25. Got stoned again decided to put the Arabs out of biz with a car the will run on leftover Mountain Dew
  26. Broke into a vending machine and stole 900 cans of Mountain Dew
  27. and so on...







Quote:
Originally Posted by Al B. Fuct View Post

Absolutely no one in that thread picked up this poor kid is using an incandescent lamp, which is sorta the problem...



his plant?



"Put my 60 watt dark blue grow bulb rite on top of it. Plant got stretchy, fell over and died. "

Yep, smoke the fork.




Quote:
Originally Posted by Al B. Fuct


I wish you all the very best of luck, the very best of yields and hope that you will take the fight to re-legalise cannabis to the op-ed pages and legislators who perpetuate this oppression, which has bases only in political dogma, not science or commonsense. You will win if you just keep hammering, but I've hammered enough in this format. I will continue to fight this good fight, but just not here.

Keep your lights bright.

Cheers,

-Al B.
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Last edited by GypsyBush; 07-04-2009 at 07:00 PM..
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